Sweat dripping down my neck,
Can I touch you please?

Salt water solves everything:
Sweat,
Tears,
And the ocean blue.

Everyone's hug
Leaves a different shaped imprint on my soul.

Without darkness,
The shadows on the wall,
My friends,
Die.

The rope is there,
Just reach a little farther dear.

Life seems brighter,
Clearer,
From the bottom of the ocean.

65 miles away
Text
Longing
Tears
Not enough to stay...

Stop darling,
Don't cut out your heart,
You need that.

Don't be scared
Even the moon has a dark side.

I am the daughter
Father Time makes life difficult for.

I like who I
Am when I
Am with
You.

My love for you is like the ocean tides.
No matter how many times it gets sent away when the shore needs to be alone for a while,
My love will always be there to come back and wash over you.

I have a confession.
I don't know very much about trains. Actually, very little at all.
I know that they have a beginning and an end, and a whole lot of middle.
Kind of like life.
Trains can take you places,
From here to there
From old to new
From start to finish
But cars can do that. Planes can too.
So why do we take trains? They take so much longer.
Except, maybe that is the whole point; the real reason.
Time is never in abundance, and we are always rushing from one chore or job to the next with no time to take a break or rest or reflect or breathe.
Sitting on a train, with nowhere to go and no control over what time you arrive at your destination, you are forced to be calm.
To just sit, and perhaps even enjoy the moment.
In reality, this is what our goal in life should be: to take pleasure in the journey.

I have another confession.
I really want to ask you to take this train with me.
I want to enjoy this journey with you, ignoring the start and forgetting how soon or abrupt the ending could be.
I want to look at the scenery and talk about pretty things and drink yummy coffee and play footsie under the table.
For the first time in my life I want to be uncertain. I don't want to know when or where or how this will end.
I think there is a part of me that already knows where our next stop is, but I can't get the image of laughing with you out of my head.
Baby, let's just see where this thing takes us.
All I know is that you get my wheels turning and my heart racing.
All I know is our beginning and our end.

*But darling, won't you fill me in on that whole lot of middle?

When I close my eyes, your blue ones stare back at me.

When I dare to breathe, I can still feel the weight of your chest crushing mine.

When I shiver in the middle of the night, I remember the rush of your skin.

When something makes my heart beat fast, I'm brought back to the times you got my heart to break out of my ribcage.

Please get out of my dreams.

I can't stand the comforting smell of your cheek.

Science says that every seven years, each cell in your body is completely new.

Nowadays I'm afraid that I will never be able to claw every last trace of you out of my veins.

My prince held his
Breath and the
Door for
Me.

Does flying to Cloud
Nine count as
"falling" in
love?

BANG
Another heart shattered by broken promises
BANG
One more bone fractured by a life unraveling in alcohol
BANG
A bullet wound from piercing insults and accusations goes untended
BANG
Another nation torn apart by differences and misunderstandings
BANG
The chair slips out from beneath his feet and another broken heart is forgotten
BANG
One more shot of ****** is traveling through her veins like spider webs that suffocate her sorrows
BANG
Another child soldier dragged into battle, bloodied and scarred on the outside as well as within
BANG
Gun violence takes another victim, an irrelevant child sent to the grave
BANG
The familiar sound of all this unjustifiable **** hitting the wall.
The sound of prison gates closing too late.
The sound of a life ended too early.
The sound of another moment lost.
BANG
The only noise capable of encompassing the sight and sound and feeling of "gone"

Who keeps reloading the gun?

Sometimes loneliness holds my hand.
Sometimes the road stretches far beyond what my imagination can fathom.
Sometimes the distance and the heartache is too much to hold.
Sometimes the worry and the danger drives me insane.
Sometimes time is on our side.
Right now it seems not to be.
But sometimes time is all you have with a person, and it is the most valuable and precious thing.

This time, for one dance in the moonlight, it would be worth it.

The curl of my toes in my shoes.
The crinkle in my nose within the mass of freckles.
The rush of blood to my blushing face.
My heart beating like a hummingbird.
Aching scars on my wrists like monkey bars.
All these walls built up around my soul,
I'm not tall enough to reach over.
I'm not loud enough to get through.

But he heard.
He had a ladder and a PA system.
He had a bandage for my scars.
Kind words for my heartbeat, slowing it down to live in the moment.

That's all you really need, just a moment in time.
A moment to connect.
A moment to care.
A moment to love,
A moment to notice.

It's the little things that matter,
What build up in fragments until you get a whole, mismatched person.
He is six feet tall and made up of compassion.
A firefighter who is afraid of burning.
A healer who doesn't like needles.
A train enthusiast and a man of survival.

I whispered his name into sunflowers, his eyes are full of galaxies.
I would get lost in them forever if I could.
Travel among the stars with the boy who heard.

The boy who stayed.

The community St. Florian, protector
From fires, lit
One inside
Me.

Listen to me.
Don't just stare at the empty space above my head, don't let your mind wander, and don't you dare be talking to that voice inside your head. Listen to me. Listen to what I am saying, not that voice. Those are the people that we need to hold accountable for the judgements and dark thoughts, the little devil on your left shoulder that stabbed the right angel to death years ago.
Your mind is a machine gun shooting holes in all of your ideas, all of your dreams, and all of your will power. We shoot down the wings of self-confidence that would have flown us to heights of the impossible.
Have I lost you yet? Are you still out there? How far are you receding back into the depths of your mind? Listen to what I am saying.
Let your fishing pole of will power cast its line into your blood stream. Let it flow down your veins, heart starts pumping again, warmth spreads into your toes until you catch your soul. Reel it in, breathe it in, let it come to the surface and taste the light. Reel in your line to your ear drums, feel the rhythm of your life and your purpose. I mean it when I say to listen to me with your heart and soul.
Now that your soul has travelled this far, fished out of the dark and guarded recesses of your body, I beg you. Wear your heart on your sleeve. Anchor it down with a safety pin of hope and faith, the things that keep you from giving up.
If you are still listening to me, then please, take it just a little leap further and believe me.
Believe me when I tell you that you are worthy. Believe me when I tell you that you have importance. Believe me when I tell you that every action you take, down to the smallest passing smile, makes a difference.
If you are still listening to me, believe me that you are beautiful to your core. I know you are. I can see your gorgeous soul pinned there to your sleeve.
The most important thing that I want you to believe, need you to believe, is that you are loved. You have no right to deny this statement when I tell you, right now, that I love each and every one of you. All of your flaws and mistakes and pains and joys and passions. Whenever you share a little part of your life with me, it makes mine worthwhile.
YOU are worthwhile.
Listen to me when I tell you: always listen to yourself.

Crashing, fighting, surviving, breathing
sun shining. It
Could be
Worse.

Two sides of a
canyon splitting below.
Where are
you?

Bonded by pride
Not your average community
The problem is the resistance in our mind
Inevitable immersion
Rats won't stay put
Pursue your passion
Discovery, adventure, escape
All you can do is find a quiet place within
The getaway
In a cup of tea
Where creativity has no limits.

Our story
Still being told
It's like backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Memories in the wind
Hair whipped around on a swing
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

You saying yes
Me saying no
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Sneaking into your room
First kiss of harmony
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Miscommunication
Broken hearts and yelling
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Three months
Distance and silent agony
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Apologies
Finally alive, breathing
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Inseparable
Those three words spoken
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Perfection too strong
Second guessing commitment
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

But I will take you
However you come to me
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

True love felt
Never dies, it's forever
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

I will always wait
Your heart is worth it
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Because there is no one else
Who knows me, loves me
Backwards and forwards
Then forwards and backwards

Like you.

You make my calloused feet feel pretty.
Like the bruises on my knees are war wounds.
As if the ladders of scars on my wrists are tiger stripes.
The freckles on my nose feel **** when you lean in for an Eskimo kiss.
Sixty-five miles away and one memory of you makes me feel beautiful. For once.

Let me tell you my life story.
I was left. But in some ways what I mean to say is that I turned left on that dead end road that our knees shake just thinking about.
I am not alone on this journey if you believe my words. The moon’s shadow holds me at night. The sun’s rays kiss my skin on days that are even ravaged by rain.
But the rain isn’t my enemy. The rain is a savior, a second chance, the miracle cure that washes away all of the pain in the world. My rain boots are my guides, sloshing through every challenge that dares an attempt to drown me.
No, I am not alone.
The wind whispers love poems into the shell of my ear. The rough sand scrapes away the imperfections between my toes until all that is left is wisdom. And love for the hard things in life.
Because it is the wave that knocked me over that taught me how to stand.
It is the bully on the playground who taught me that my Wonder Woman cape really does fit my shoulders.
And it is the heartache and the pain that punched me in the stomach that taught me how much I love air.
The words on the leather pages of dusty books leap into my arms and scream, “the past may be permanent, but it is written down just for you to breathe in their lessons.”
You see, no beautiful moment is ever lost. They are merely built upon until they are skyscrapers tall enough for every suicidal person to escape ever reaching the ground.
I have heard stories about reaching for cloud nine, but that isn’t what I want. Flying isn’t the dream that caresses my shaking body when the midnight air turns cold.
No, I aspire to go higher than that, to shoot way past the moon to those stars that have always been flickering just to prove that the darkness takes over sometimes. And that is okay.
Without the darkness those stars would never shine.
Life is made out of sugar and can crumble at any touch but I will never be afraid to stick out my tongue and taste it.
I may have been left, but that doesn’t mean that my decision wasn’t right.
Because now, forever I can say that the universe is painted on the back of my hand. And I can tell you that I know myself like every drop of color that has mingled with my skin cells.
I may have been left, but at the same time I was given to the matrix that harmonizes this world.
I now know that sometimes, we are just as naïve as the caterpillars who have no idea what life has in store for them.

Throughout a lifetime one can meet thousands of people.
Some merely slip by on your radar; others may have a profound impact on your perspective of the world. Some will hurt you, some will support you, some you will fall in love with, and others will be your saviors. But what all of those thousands of people have in common is that they will teach you some sort of lesson.
How to trust. How to move on. How to love yourself. And how to throw yourself into the chaos of this imperfect world just to seek out something beautiful. This life is all about connections and interactions, finding chemical reactions with some people and atomic explosions with others.
But beauty and pure love can be hard to find. Every person is fighting their own battle, to the point of exuding cynicism, distrust and even aggression.
I myself have no trouble retreating into my mind and stepping on eggshells just to avoid conflict or pain, even to the point of missing out on all of the passion felt by people.

Across the oceans so far from home
Anxious to see what comes your way
Overwhelmed by a culture you've never known
Mustering up courage to face a new day

Foreign eyes present a mystery
Searching every corner for kindness
Desperate desires to run and flee
But this opportunity you cannot miss

Teamwork and bonding
In bright faces you find comfort
A new place for more loving
It doesn't feel like work

Sweat blood and tears
Open arms so welcoming
No longer any fears
It feels so good to be helping

A new perspective on what it means to be alive
How can a people with so little give so much?
Pura Vida a motto to keep love in the light
Now forever your heart will be touched

Butterfly kisses in the morning rain
Make you want to do it all over again
These Ticos' kind hearts will never bring pain
Merely the fullest life and no need for shame

Many of Earth's citizens don't know how to live well
Peace and love is not a flowing thought
War and hunger gets caught in the swell
Struggling when the meaning of life is forgot

So when the sky is crying
And the world feels strange
Place your enlightened ear to your shell
And rise as a leader to be the change.

I need you
Like shoes need laces
July needs June
And words need pages

I love you
Like peanuts love jelly
Piglet loves Pooh
And Lucy loves bellies

You keep me safe
You keep me warm
You fix me up
When my heart is torn

Without you I am lost
With you I shine
I know your love comes with a cost
I can’t believe that you are mine

I take your love for granted
How can I tell you that I care
Even when my life goes slanted
It means the world to have you there

You make a house a home
You can bring joy to all life
The most beautiful woman known
You take away my strife

Always in my heart
I will love you forever
Never too far apart
When I can have you as my mother.

The ground is wet
The sun is gone
The worst is still to come

Because in this life
We are alone
To endure the pain and death

But maybe now
The sun will show
Its face for all to see

I hope that soon
The warmth will come
Reach out to try to save me.

Every day we walk the line
Live or die
Laugh or Cry

One little slip
Your world goes flying
In what direction
You’re deciding

We make the decision day to day
Hide behind the pain or have your way
Walk the line and try to balance
Pray that you don’t fall.

Half the time we’re blind
We never truly see
So wrapped up in the mist of darkness
To ever know we’re free

To make our own choices
And live up the day
So caught up in the bad
We just swing life away

So lift up the veil
Try and see the light
Be part of this world
And look past the night.

I sit and watch you with tears in my eyes
Nothing I can do for you, I can’t tell you why
You sit in sadness and say you love her, you miss her
And I know nothing I do will ever be enough for you.
All she gave you was not what you deserved
Yet you wish you got more, you’re so blind to me
As I sit on the sidelines with no voice of my heart
I want to give you the things that you need
Be anything that you ask me to be
You say I’m so perfect, so flawless, so beautiful
Then why won’t you choose me?
You sit and cry at the past
While I’m here wanting to be your future
But that doesn’t matter to you
Because she was all you ever needed.
I sit and cry at night, it’s too much to bare
To love with all my heart when you’re not there
I want to give you everything that I have
But I know that I’ll never be what you want.
This doesn’t matter anyway, like I have a chance
Like you would care for me and ask for a dance
But I’ll be here anyway incase you need a shoulder
I’ll stick around and just act like your soldier
Because that’s all I’ll ever be to you.
I’ve found my fairytale, you’re my prince charming
But the only flaw to this story is I’m not your princess.
I’ve stopped wishing on stars
They won’t work anymore
It’ll just keep reminding me of what I can never have.
If you ever wanted me too, well isn’t that a laugh
And I try to make you happy every day
However you want.
The people writing the saying missed out the part that says
It will hurt
Because love truly is the slowest form of suicide.
It hurts to make you happy
Because I know I’m not needed, not wanted
But never again shall I find another quite like you.

She sits on the pavement
And nobody knows
That all she needs is to let it go
So as people pass by
See the tears in her eyes
They will never know why they flowed

She cried for herself and the love she’s missed out on
She cried for the night when the clouds hid the moon
She cried for her innocence lost in the battle of life
And the soldiers who can’t clean their wounds

Now the tears fall heavier
As she’s drenched in thought
Who cries for the ones that the world forgot?

She cried for the love that’s been drained from the world
She cried for the times she’s been blinded
She cried for the little things that won’t be remembered
And the decisions that won’t be decided

Can the world not see what’s happening?
The terrors that are haunting the night?
Does the world not want to see peace again?
Why do we continue the fight?

She cried for the wars that’ll never be over
She cried for the child who’s heart lost its light
She cried for the forgotten four-leaf clover
And the people who’ve lost faith in life

Her heart has been severed
Sliced by the world’s sorrows
Now who thinks themselves lucky
To see the darkened tomorrow?

She cried for the times she’d ran and not walked
She cried for those who can’t dance in the rain
She cried for the leaders who just couldn’t talk
And the stars that won’t be seen again

Now the light becomes dim as she closes her eyes
All the tears she’s cried, the forgotten lies
Maybe one day we can all cut these ties
Maybe one day, together we’ll cry.

In a life so full of imperfections
It’s hard to see the wonders
Of a world in a rush to see the next light
We need to stop before it’s smothered

Have you ever watched a flower bloom
Or seen a vanilla twilight?
Or stopped to see the leaves turn gold
And a smile light someone’s eyes

Tell me have you ever counted the stars in the sky
Just to see if some were missing?
Or sat beside a riverbank to watch the water glistening

You’d better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Live in the moment
Before it becomes your past

Pick up a penny and walk through the rain
Indulge in a culture you’ve never heard named
Take some risks and try something new
Because you never know what could complete you

Laugh freely and love a lot
Do something daring and never get caught
Believe in your family and lean on your friends
You needn’t be alone to make amends

Pay attention to the little things
Because they could become huge
Take this life slowly
And shoot for the moon.

If we want the world to be at peace
In faith we must hold the most profane acts
Look to the sun and over tallest peeks
Accept each other and sew all the cracks

End the segregation that tears us apart
Let inequality fade to the distance
Have our inner beauty become an art
And we’ll have an end to this resistance

The people who start wars never fight them
And those who grow our food never eat it
Children stuck inside of all this mayhem
Are trying to find reasons not to quit

With the balance of life so out of place
What sort of troubles are we soon to face?

White flowers and purple flowers
Grow the same way
So why can’t every man
Live their own life each day?

We all work and love and suffer
The same
No one should die because of
Something insane

Your religion is wrong
Your skin the wrong colour
But no one can change themselves
To be another

Living and breathing
Should never be a crime
Because sooner or later
We all run out of time

Whether we are black, white
Skinny, or tall
No one has the ability
To break through it all

Everyone has the right
To live on this earth
So let’s pick these broken flowers
Up off the dirt.

Best of friends so close to each other
Two peas in a pod no need for cover
Trust completely without hesitation
Can love each other without vacation

Waking up, life’s here again
It’s not just us, you have more friends
I sit like a candle in the wind
One blow from you and I’m caving in

Days are passing, no word from you
And I thought we were stuck like glue
I’m here for comfort, I see your sorrows
Staring at you, wanting a different tomorrow

Now I can’t get you out of my mind
But you can’t seem to find the time
To think of me, am I doing fine?
Would you notice if I cried inside?

When we hug I can feel your affection
Look in your eyes and I see a connection
But I listen close, there is nothing to hear
All I can smell is fear

Fear of losing you, are we still friends?
From you I can’t tell, so I’ll just pretend
Things are going great, a magical wonderland
I don’t understand why you let go of my hand

I saw you today, the desire was all mine
I’ll sit watching my phone and wait for the chime
No message so far, all you give me is silence
Walking in the dark, I pray for no violence

Was I holding so tight you slipped through my fingers?
My vulnerability I showed you, now the dark angel lingers
I loved you more than everybody combined
But you showed me that you were never mine

Now I can’t get you out of my mind
But you can’t seem to find the time
To think of me, am I doing fine?
No, not since you left me crying inside.

She could walk like this forever
Away from all the hurt
Telling truths and cutting ties
Her lone feet slapping the dirt

This is not the life she wanted
Denial oozing in her wake
With no love her heart is haunted
All she feels is fake

But she can see a light in the tunnel
She prays it’s not a train
With these monsters on her heal
She runs for it again

Life was kind this time it seems
There was no train to run her over
Instead stood a boy with eyes that gleamed
Holding a four leaf clover

The heavens smiled as he took her hand
The pain just melted away
This bliss took her to a faraway land
But she’ll have to return some day

Her problems haven’t vanished
They sit watching her like vultures
When she’s all alone she panics
The pressure forcing her down from her shoulders

Her boy is a ray of sunshine
Blocking out the rain
But the sun always goes down sometime
In the darkness she’s afraid

Eyes stare from all directions
Accusations seem to linger
Her life is not her own anymore
With so many pointing fingers

Her heart was shattered years ago
Raw emotions just hers to keep
Just because her wounds don’t show
Doesn’t mean they don’t go deep

Splintered glass strewn across the floor
Tender feet won’t dare to step
Her golden boy is heroic though
She couldn’t bare it if he wept

Her soul’s made up of jagged pieces
Merely smoothed by her fake smiles
Those who get close can feel the grazes
To stop the pain they’d have to walk miles

Living would be unbearable
If the boy was ever scratched
Being broken’s already terrible
Hurting him’s like touching a match

How could someone so beautiful
Be in love with one so tainted?
He’s innocent and wonderful
For herself she’s filled with hatred

The fear is closing in now
She starts doing what she does best
Running away without making a sound
Tears falling she leaves all the rest

Exhausted and panting she collapsed on the floor
Her wounded heart closed from the onslaught of swords
She turns a tear-streaked face to the closed door
Trying not to think of what she’ll miss even more.

Swirling colours all around
The wind whipping through your hair
Normal words don’t make a sound
Nobody knows that you are there

Empty shells across the beach
Lonely critters have no home
Subconscious voices you need to teach
No place or person to call your own

It’s like walking down a winding road
Where the end never gets nearer
Like staring through a looking glass
Where your vision doesn’t get clearer

The point of life is lost now
Vanished completely from sight
Moving on you don’t know how
Your goal was lost in light

Depressed is not the word
Emotions a jumbled stew
Screaming loud you cannot be heard
Wishing badly you could be new

Smiling doesn’t come easily
You lift your spirit with might
Your stomach’s turning queasily
As you wade through judgment’s night

Inside your heart is screaming
Locked in a battered cage
With no voice your thoughts are reeling
Hard eyes expressing unspoken rage

Eventually life feels normal
The same pictures over and over
Emotions so quiet stuck in a spiral
No desire to leave the corner

Feeling like a butterfly with cut off wings
A bruised apple left to rot
Feeling like a bird with no ability to sing
A desperate case that the world forgot

If you run as fast as you can forever
At some point you’re sure to fall
No love for once, it seems like never
You just can’t break through it all

That light in the distance is growing brighter
But up close it’s just a train
When it hits you you’re no longer a fighter
No will to stand up again

Please no more dandelions and stars
Wishing never works
All at once just emptiness and scars
You can’t escape the hurt

The world is colder, you’re growing older
People play you like a game
You’ve given up, curled in a corner
No strength to try life again.

Tough skin
But soft heart
Strong bones
But fragile parts
Who could expect anything less?

Kind smile
Selfless acts
Would run for miles
To have my back
You will forever deserve the best

I will be your shoulder
When all you need is to cry
And I’ll be your resource
When your love runs dry
Because all my giving is worth it
To see that laughter in your eyes

You are the macaroni to my cheese
And the peanut butter to my jam
Rip me open if you please
Nothing will lose you my hand

I would walk 500 miles
Just to fall down at your door
And hack away their devilish smiles
Just to see your face once more

There’s nothing that could keep me away from you
I would fight them tooth and claw
Because there is nothing I would rather do
Than love you for all that you are.

Breathe in one
Exhale two
Breathe in three
Exhale four

Breathe in love
Exhale hate
Breathe in healing
Exhale pain

Find your center
Calm your mind
Things don't go right
All the time

Learn to let go
Don't suffocate
Go with the flow
And don't deflate

The world is ever changing
There's nothing you can grasp
So why bother crying
When you can't erase the past

If something is painful
Stop right away
But there's no stopping the rainfall
On your sunny day

So grab your Wellington boots
We're gonna get drippy
But there's nothing that can't be solved
With some dancing and skipping

Free yourself
Bad times don't last
Be yourself
Before today's your last

Breathe in happy
Exhale stress
Breathe in beauty
Exhale ugliness

Breathe in one
Exhale two
Breathe in three
Exhale four

I never want this moment to end
This moment that feels like a god send
This moment that makes me feel complete bliss
Like nothing in the world is amiss
Yet the world rotates on and on
And sooner or later that moment is gone

Time marches forward never stopping never slowing
Innocent wishing flowers get caught in the fray
But love is fearless and love is strong
Like stars in the heavens it won't ever fade away.

Stars so high are winking at me
Swimming in the velvet sky
Thoughts like constellations with unknown meaning
The endlessness sparkling in your eyes

Guidance falling from above
Shooting stars that point the way
Galaxies wrapping you up in their love
Dreaming so the beauty stays

Too far to reach the glistening heavens
Hold your breath now start to try
Stripped now of internal weapons
Ragged skies release and cry

Get lost in dreams and distant thoughts
Spiral tumble down Saturn's rings
Take the risk and shoot for stars
A lullaby now the moon man sings.

Boy, you are my anchor.
You keep me from getting washed out into the raging sea we call life.
You keep me safely grounded to a place I can call home.
If home is where the heart is, then my heart is at the bottom of the ocean.
Close to you.
Linked to my anchor.
But boy, anchors partake in shipwrecks.
Sometimes you hold me under until I drown.
Weighted down by this heavy heart of mine that at times you refuse to bare with me.
At the bottom of the ocean I am naked, raw, suffocating.
But when I look up and see all of the crashing waves and angry currents above me as I sit
in these quiet depths,
I realize that you were always my savior.
Under the pressure of it all, at least I can feel.
The ocean knows all pain, welcoming my salty tears like glistening jewels to be buried as legends.
The story of us will travel with me forever as I sail the seven seas.
One thing I can't deny though boy,
is that even when the winds and the waves push and pull me,
like an anchor you never change.

You will always take my breath away.

Be bed is my home.
Don't they always say that home is where the heart is? Okay, so my bed may not house my friends and my family, or my school and social life. But this is the place where my heart rests. Calming the pounding beat after a wonderful time, and nursing the wounds of a time not quite as kind. This 6-foot mattress is the shelter where my heart can expand, releasing what society expects to be hidden.
Some people may think that this is an ugly home. Believe me, these four corners have contained more heartbreak than even Shakespeare dared to write about, and more pain than a heartfelt hug could gather in its arms. But home isn't where you should be judged.
Sometimes when I can't sleep at night, I stretch my fingers and I stretch my toes and I spread out as far as I can over the bed sheets just to get the reassurance that I fit somewhere. At least in my world I do.
This is the world that has cultivated dreams, nurturing them every night, and then has the decency to put them to rest after they have been battered and bruised. A place not only for beginnings, but for endings too.
My bed has seen the best of me and the worst of me. In fact, it has seen all of me and still stays faithfully in the corner of my room.
Home is where you can laugh hysterically until you cry, **** your pillow, let the blood drip freely from your pain, and then cry yourself to sleep.
No one likes to admit it, but this is the heart. All of the ugliness and the pain and the ecstasy and the love, sometimes all at once.
To experience the world and embrace life at its seams, we need to wear our hearts safely pinned to our sleeves. And when that safety pin gives out under the weight of fear and disillusionment, my pillow will always be there to cushion the fall.
Even if you aren't.