a new year for you
old fashioned
i'll lay my head in the lap of you
and think of years past
and these years,
they pass
stand by as we grow
into
new

give me
the night
to lay in
i'll wrap my arms
around the hours
until i swallow the age in
ageless or aimless
are we now?
i can't keep my head in this
so instead
i gaze out
and fade in
bow out
because the body is tired
of repercussions
give me anything
to feel sentimental
over
and i'll adore it
like i've never known
love
before

darling
you are no longer
my darling
because you've a head full of other
darlings
yet, you still won't admit it
you'd rather lie next to my side
and sleep in lies
but why don't you lay next your truths
instead?

G R I D

mark it up
laugh it off
it's a toss
this game of once overs
i've run over
the scenarios many times
in my mind
long afternoon of hours
daydreaming of you
and how soulless our song together is
it's not that we don't have intent
it's just the combination of two sad lines
don't make one thing right
and i want to be ready for once
to look something in the eye
and believe in it
and you know
with your love
i never could
and you never wanted me to

i look at you
in a different
way
even your face has changed
how could it not?
morphed into something aimless
just for the sake of tainting
blonde dream
you died in streaks
wondering where it was you left
faith in
burial
now it's seen
even the sky
mourns you

4th of july. you haunted me but now i thank you. you gave me what no other Holiday could. you showed me truth. you showed me ruin. you made this heart of gold turn into stone and then back into flesh. ready for something good, ready for something new.

we will never see eye to eye
you, on the other side of this country
could never be mine
and rightfully so, i do not want you
it's taken me a long time
to get there
to feel a void
to not let my mind get to there
nowadays,
it stays
still
so still
like i've always wanted it to