T - Hello Poetry

T Jan 2013

Buzzed

The buzzing starts,
Like incessant bugs
Toying with my ears;
They zip and fly about my head
And my beauty falls away in small clumps
Which then lands on my shoulders and at my feet
Until I am wading in my femininity

The buzzing stops,
The bugs leave
And my head now bare
Glows like some beacon
That illuminates my flaws

I have been stripped of my shield,
My insecurities lay defenseless in the open;
I am ugly

Then I am lighter,
Nothing to weigh me down,
My safety blanket
Had been smothering me
Now, I can breathe

And I breathe in,
Sweep up my insecurities
And face myself
My feminine self
My raw self
My real self

And I see beauty

Shaving my head was the best thing I've ever done for myself.

T Jan 2013

More Than a Dream

I must confirm my existence
I grasp and hug and pinch and feel
Anything I can get my hands on
Just to prove it's real

Everything is vibrant with
Breath
In and out
Right and left
The colours expand
Contract
Disappear
Come back

It's all too surreal
Must be my imagination
A little of this and that
A total compilation
Of everything
That was and is
All that's bad
And all my bliss

Life's too short
To not just be
There's so much to do
And so much to see
And everything
Is so **** right
I'm terrified
That at the end of the night

*I'll wake up

T Jan 2013

First Snow

Oh the words evade me
Like snowflakes that melt at my touch
So many to grab
And yet they won't ever find my palm
Or my lips
And so I spin in circles
Open mouthed
Waiting for that moment
When I taste the labor or the clouds
And the way you make me feel

T Jan 2013

2 A.M.

I'm pretty sure you could
feel my heart
beating
through my coat
as we stood outside my house in that long
embrace

The air was
brisk
and our breath poured out like
mist
from our smiles

You leaned down to
kiss me
And twas so well received
I hugged you tighter
A silent plead for you to never
leave

So we stood there
A little mangled from the
night
Kissing ourselves silly
Because it felt so
right

T Jan 2013

A Visit

There are some days
when you can see the Moon
in broad daylight
It's a ghost of it's usual self,
peeking out from some invisible pocket of baby blue velvet
I don't know why it does this
and I'm sure there is a scientific answer to explain
but I don't want to know that
I would rather go about thinking
that maybe the moon gets lonely and comes out to visit with the Sun
Their shifts are always clashing
and it's pretty hard to keep a relationship when you're working nights and they work days
The Sun and the Moon work to balance the Earth
Pretty demanding work
I bet they miss each other
I find that you can only see the Moon
on really beautiful days
Maybe it's because that rare visit
is making the Sun very happy
Or maybe it's chance

T Jan 2013

Master Plan

I just don't think you'll understand
That this was never
part of my plan

I was to get over him
only to later get under him
And you weren't ever supposed to show interest

But you did
And for the life of me
I can not see
why

You knew I was warped and distraught
But you dropped everything and caught
me on my way down

That's actually not true
I hit the ground long before you
even unpacked

But you helped me up
And gave a ****
And proceeded to pay for dinner

Now here we are
I've come quite far
And I'm not sure if you've noticed

That I've fallen for you
my intentions now true
I know that plans can change

I've learned a lot in the last year.

T Jan 2013

New Years In June

Do three hundred and sixty five days have to pass
Before I can start anew?
Things are changing
And my time is waning
No longer can I wait
To erase mistakes and wipe out hate
That has marred my inner self
So help me to grab right now
And hold it as my own
I've seen my ways
In older days
And am horrified at best
So as a favor
Be my savior?
It'd be best if you said yes
All I ask is this
Be my New Years kiss
In June