All alone in a crowded room.
Eyes,
So many eyes,
Staring at me through the glass.
Isolating me
Until I exist solely in my own reality –
Alone,
With so many watching.

Poison,
An icy substance.
I cannot feel my fingers,
But I know they are still there.
I'm watching them twitch,
And for once we have something in common-
We're both watching me.

Vision blurring,
I no longer see clearly.
But I see your face,
Standing out amongst all the strangers.
You cannot stop staring.

Something's changed in me.
What have they done?
Oh God, what was in that vial?
Why did you passively stand by and watch?
Watch me –
I'm succumbing to the experiment.


My spine is breaking.
I do not feel it,
I am numb,
But my view has shifted.
Now I see the ceiling.
Tiles, shifting?
I can no longer name the colors.
Muscles tearing.
What shape is my body in now?
Can you tell me?
I know you know,
I feel your eyes watching me.

I'm screaming,
Though I cannot hear,
My eardrums popped long ago.
I'm bleeding,
I cannot figure out where.
I'm choking,
I'm suffocating.
So much blood.
How can you watch me die?

My last thoughts,
That I'm crazy.
My last thoughts,
That I'm out of control.
My last thoughts,
That you watched me
Lose
*Control.

I rise,
compelled by your stare.
Those sparkling blue eyes,
the most beautiful things I have ever seen,
command my every move.
Anchored to the ground by the strain of my toes,
I could easily rise higher,
floating away in a giggling bliss.

You make quick work of the space between us,
dispelling the nothingness that tries to keep us apart.
A trail permanently burns into my skin
where your hands had traveled before resting on my hips.
The warmth of your body,
fueled by a quickening pulse,
becomes my new life source.
No longer will I need to breathe
with you breathing,
existing,
for the both of us.

I rise,
compelled by your stare.
You step in,
drawn to my confidence.
You and I,
*collide.

I whisper it over and over again –
your name.
Under my breath,
as I repeat it like a secret,
the syllables tickle my tongue,
linger on my lips,
then hover in the air around me,
warming both my insides and my limbs,
enveloping me in a cloud of magic,
making me whole again.

My tongue expertly navigates the rising and falling sounds of your name.
It is similar to mine,
eerily so,
with a sweet twist that never fails to plaster a smile to my face.
My lips form the letters of your surname at a leisurely pace,
indulging in the pleasing way it fits in my mouth,
cradling the sounds,
wishing for them to remain mine forever.

I whisper your name wherever I go,
carrying you through each part of my life.
But when I'm alone,
your name echoes off the walls,
electrifying the air with the addition of two new words,
a loaded gun,
uttered before your thrilling name,
I and love
a collection of beautiful syllables that I can no longer contain.

The soft texture tickled her toes
And she was quick to replace her bare foot,
Searching for a place free of the
Delicate petals
That fell from her hands.

Twelve more fragile futures fell to the ground,
Collecting in an indecisive heap
Whose beautiful, red hues
Played tricks with the sun,
Filling her head with illusions
That all will be alright.

She slashed at the other flowers
Standing tall and proud around her,
Dancing with the wind
To heart stopping lyrics
Sung in a language she could not understand.
Tearing them up from the roots,
She cursed their peaceful attitude
And cold, heartless souls
That continued to exude radiance
As they teased her fragile heart,
Dishing out good and bad news
With a lovely toss of their golden center.

It began to rain on their flawless figures,
Yellow drops burning imperfect circles
Through the otherwise perfect surface of their petals.
For minutes, it continued to pour on the flowers,
The large bottle held in the girl's trembling hand,
Marked kerosene,
Seemed to never run dry,
Drowning the roots in a deadly poison.

"He loves me not!"
She shouted,
Tossing the bottle aside,
Only after showering herself in the
Polluted rain,
Becoming momentarily fixated on the way she reflected the light
With dozens of drops clinging to her skin.

The lighter was ruby red,
Just like the petals who told of such a gloomy future.
She had purchased it at the drug store because of its color,
Her reflection bathed in red hid her uneven skin tone,
Making her for the first time an image of beauty.  

Flames took to the parched earth
Like a teenage girl to dreams of happily ever after.
Petals turned to ashes
And skin to a yellow, melted liquid,
Which fueled the inferno better than the yellow rain.

Blistered fingers still held the lighter,
The only thing visible in the dark,
Smoky air.
She clung to the image of her reflection,
Staring at the face that had never been loved,
And never would be,
Long after flames took her sight.

I want to write beautiful words on your skin.
Tattoo them with ink mixed with berries and blood.
I want to whisper my love in sweet, gasping breaths.
The words will seep deep and etch forever my name.
I'll make a mark in your life,
You'll be forever divine,
Forever mine.

Let's get drunk off each other,
My breath reeking of wine,
Yours smoky and sweet.
I'll pull you along on a leash made of roses
Picked straight from the garden,
Thorns dripping with love, a deadly red poison
A sticky, crimson substance addictive and ****.
I'll make a mark in your life,
You'll be forever divine,
Forever mine.

Close your eyes and count to ten,
Trust me not to take your life.
I'm learning a language known only to us,
Each gasp, breath, and jagged promise
Creating a rhythm of love lost to others.
I wish to place a finger on your lips
Trace your face and kiss your jaw.
Just like the blind learning to see,
I'm creating a map for a world just for me.
I'll make a mark in your life,
You'll be forever divine,
Forever mine.

I love you more than words can ever say
As I'm swaying to the music that I know will never die.
Take my hand,
One last dance,
Until eternity fades away,
You and I were never meant to separate.

Sing a tune,
A whistle high,
A melody oh so low,
Slowly turning, twisting, to the beat.
As time ticks away
We shall never age
You and I free forever
Like the notes that can never seem to stay in-between the lines.

The moment passed long go
Where we could go our separate ways.
Now you and I remain intertwined.
One beat that's true
One breath that fades
Changing with the tempo of our love.
One life to live
One voice to sing
One never ending melody
One world that's wrapped around our poisoned ring finger.

The sunsets on the fading day
It's crushing weight to hide the light
Yet we still shine through the inky night
Waiting for the world to end.

Her fingers shook as she pulled up her dress.
Nail polish,
A ninety-nine cent ‘Reckless Red’,
Provided startling contrast to
Her deathly pale skin
Covered with gooseflesh.

“I’m not sure,”
She whispered,
Her voice hardly audible to the man
Standing above her.
Her thumb drew circles over a patch of unmarked,
Smooth skin.
She added a little pressure,
Giving color.
It didn’t take much to feel her bone.
She was such a delicate woman,
No, child,
And her skin was paper-thin,
Her body free of fat.

A new set of fingers joined hers.
His touch sure and gentle,
Obviously aware of her nerves,
Trying somehow to reassure her
And succeeding.
He had closely clipped nails,
Filed with tender care
Into a smooth curve.  

Letting go of conscious thought,
She allowed her body to relax into the chair.
Intense, focused lighting caused sweat to bead on her skin,
Her body sticking to the fake leather.
Soon her voice erased all further nerves
As she trusted the stranger with her life story,
Which he sketched onto her skin,
Adding his own take of ‘The End’.

Her fingers shook as she traced her journey.
Nail polish,
A ninety-nine cent ‘Reckless Red,’
Complemented the inked stars
Which said more than words ever could
About what she overcame.