When she first walked through the door
She was a Ghanaian priestess
A titan
Large and mythical and unbelievable
Her eyes held mystery
Deeper than poetry
And her walk
More grace than a royal procession
I can’t believe she looked at me

She sat detached from the lights
The crowd, the noise, the libations
Her presence was louder
I felt every inch of separation
Wanting distance to shrink
Wanting her eyes to question me
I can’t believe I talked to her

Weak prose and memorized verse
Why hadn’t I written something new
Of dreams with answers
Words that could entice her sight
Instead I opened a window
And shared a simple view
I really wanted to bust down a door
Or demolish a wall
Or flatten a building
As sacred space for her feet
I can’t believe I got her number

Insightful reels and pics
Over analytical data
Assumption of interests and realms occupied
I think she rose from the ocean’s depths
To swallow the earth whole
Or rebirth it
All this from 10 minutes
How exactly do light years condense
Into such time
I can’t believe she said yes to a date

Ears swoon at her voice
Tongue delights in sushi rolls
Heart pounds at something
I am unable to admit
I wish for more time to sip her tea
To savor her umami
I go in for the hug and omit my lust
I can’t believe I didn’t go for the kiss
I can’t believe I didn’t go for the kiss
I can’t believe she said yes to a second date

In a foreign house
with more comfort than my own
Fung shei challenging chaotic thoughts
Chaotic thoughts racing through her unknowns
A touch to feed her laugh
A look to feed my longing
My lips to her lips
In a time outside of time
When chaos and order dance together
I can’t believe I’m falling
I can’t believe I’m falling
I can’t believe I’m falling
But my stomach knows this feeling
And my heart knows this pace

I can’t believe I found her
In another lifetime
She can’t believe I ever left

the classroom has no doors or windows
  no walls or boards

in the 13th grade there was an unboxing
to unlearn
tossed the rubric and curriculum aside
to make way for words unwritten
     have you ever found clarity in the unknown
     discovered validation in the void
darkness has taught me insight
way better than any book or person
amidst trembling and shaking limbs
there was a steady hand
guiding
    with more wrinkles than time
         winding
  with more curves than straight lines

I have talked to my ancestors
listened to the texture of wisdom
through their frequency
528 Hz   -   that's love
      outside of checked boxes
      and conditionals
if you surrender to feeling fully
then you will know   -   that's love
and the heart can hold
just as much memory as the brain
  if you're open to receiving

body,   every body
will tell you of the risk
of running toward freedom
spirit,   every spirit
will tell you of the reward
of not staying stuck
   a universal student
I have a couple answers now
           but still no definitive statements
I am in the timeline I'm creating
and yet
             I am so much more than a point
the finite is a container for the infinite

this classroom has no walls or windows
no doors or boards
this teacher                no face

the buddha is in everything
    and that's love

Logic tries to guide me
I slip on fallacies
                                                                                   Intuition releases me
                                                                                   I float unsure

this is all I can do to stop the words
the anticipation of something great
      or disappointing
I hope the former

my stomach is a pit
that deepens with each  l  o  o  s  e  breath
diaphragm creates space for love
and pain
unsure of which will last longer

I cannot see your face
but I can picture your desire
it is mirrored in my eyes
clears a home in my mouth
though unspoken

I want to part your lips and slip you a secret
   I want you more than my form can hold

can we melt together
is this too much to ask for the first time
if so              I can stop the words
   (their expression, at least
not their existence)