The burn.
The cough.
The taste.
The high.
You could call me a supporter of the Devil’s Lettuce, aka M a r i j u a n a.

They always tell you when you’re younger how drugs **** and aren’t attractive, but why are they so tasty and appealing then?

Every person has a different
back story- why they drink, why they do drugs, why they decide to walk to class
instead of taking the bus.

Big or small, there are reasons behind each action
a person makes.

My words are not sincere
Please don’t fear.
I’m speaking how I am in the moment; Not permanently.

I’m not negative. I’m not suicidal. I’m not an alcoholic or addict.

I’m reality, remember? And no one wants me,
So I might as well join in on the lies
What all goes into putting on a mask when will we reveal
Who we are and what we want
No more games
No more lies
Reality.

My words are not sincere
Please don’t fear.
I’m speaking how I am in the moment; Not permanently.

I’m not negative. I’m not suicidal. I’m not an alcoholic or addict.

I’m reality, remember? And no one wants me,
So I might as well join in on the lies
What all goes into putting on a mask when will we reveal
Who we are and what we want
No more games
No more lies
Reality.

Isn’t it funny how we value pointless objects
Baby Blankets
Rattles
Shoes
Coins
Why
?
Because
We’re all so empty inside
We need something substantial to grasp
To quench our thirst
That’s why you see liquor stores almost as frequent as McDonald’s
We all need a distraction from this living hell
And objects are starting to fail us
Alcohol, you’re up.

Leaving home is bittersweet
But where is home?
Minnesota? Illinois?
Minneapolis? Aurora?
­ Where do I belong
Where am I happy
At peace.
Resting finally.
Till the next storm hits.

Music calms the nerves of anxiety
But alcohol hits the spot
A sweet shot of whiskey
Or the sour punch of *****
My troubles fade away
As my perception of reality does too Happiness fills my life
Eyes glisten with love
Short breaths escape
My locked mouth open
I am verbal now
Unlocked till sober
When the alcoholic dream
Is sadly over.

Family? Never heard of her.
Abuse of drugs and stimulants
Why?
To escape the pain
Because now the pain has become pleasure
So who am I?
Numb.