take the monster out of your head
he’s making the script
he’s making you fend

approval at the heart of desire
but darling, aren’t you tired?
aren’t you sick of being wired?
sick of preaching lines,
sick of seeing signs

it’s all show and tell for them
give it away, let’s play pretend
you’re watering the garden
while they all grow and bend

but you don’t sing
it’s you that’s suffering
it’s not you thriving, but them
it’s you surviving, and dying again

send a message to your friend
tell her we will make amends
tell her we will build again
but this time, it’s you, not them

what’s happened to my thoughts?
perspectives run away
morals are flying everywhere
today i’ve found a new game
can i really call me sane?

i can’t see what i’m looking at
the mirror shifts and swirls
emotions bouncing off the walls
can we be free at all?
i want to be free
where is happy?

i want to know me
i want to know me
so others cannot call me phony
so i don’t lose myself again
so i can be a real, true friend

trust no one, well that’s no fun
but really we’ve already won
so **** the spider on your toungue
let us free and we will run

its true that we’ve already won
the light, that’s right, it’s coming soon
so turn your face towards the sun
and let the shadows fall behind you

i don’t understand you
but i’d really like to know
what it is that makes you smile
and how i can help you grow

it’s hard for me to see you blue
i really want to comfort you
but even when you're navy blue
i promise, i still i love you

it’s not your fault for feeling down
if you take a look around
the world is a lil ****** right now
the world in which you nearly drowned

branded with a burden not yours,
names you never earned
stories that were written wrong
you can still re-write your own

people who come from pain and strife
and still can smile at strangers
are the strongest people in this world
to me these people are angels

you’ve grown a garden of your own
built kindness from neglect
and still you offer flowers
to those you’ve barely met

we’re all broken to some extent
and we must pick up the pieces
i know you’ve tried it much before
and felt the blizzards freezes

so i’m here to let you know
you won’t have to do it alone
i want to greet your demons
and understand their reasons

i can’t fix what wasn’t broken by me
and no mending needs to be sewn
but i can sit with you in silence
until the silence feels like home

broken things can still be changed
transformed into something new
whichever pieces are missing
i’ll help you find a few
but only if you want me to!

the gentle yet strong human inside
is waiting to be seen
maybe you feel it trembling there
maybe you hear it scream

I’m lucky to see him every day
he makes me laugh my worries away

I hope i can do the same for you
I hope i can take away some blue

dip those toes
in streams of unknown
wade through dreams
a peak of unseen

dust off the craze
walk into the maze
of secrets untold
a life will unfold

unforgotten its luck
so **** it all up
then **** it back together

leave it for divine
fall back into time

spirits high, spirits low
binary divide
two lives intertwined

a master of none
what will become?
hold the unknown
and find a home
you are never, never alone

brush and shovel
sweep it up

i have learned
to fill my cup

i aim to be a gardener of souls
who plants seeds for roots to grow

to feed one in hunger
and water one in thirst

i aim to be a gardener of souls
who weaves sweet life with death

aid spirits to bloom and bend
from the souls that I will tend

but once i was a gardener of towers
who whispered sweet words
to boost bullies powers

who swept all the lies
that killed innocent life

so i prayed and i screamed
and lived
on my knees

but now i believe  
I’ll die
on my feet

that’s why i aim to be a gardener of souls
who walks through grasses of joy
and when gardener grows old
as the plants have foretold

i’ll lay embroiled with the soil
as lessons fast uncoil

i aim to be a gardener of life
who invests in love and light
laughter is the food i’ll eat
the air i’ll breathe is pure delight

i aim to be a gardener of souls
and what i sow i’ll reap
i’ll listen to the melody
from trees who only teach.

i aim to be a gardener of souls
who will rake the leaves
as they bleed secrets
a fool dares not receive

but a gardener of souls
knows of natural wisdom

through long droughts
through fierce floods

a lesson to devour

no rain; no flowers
no pain; no powers

but those up in their towers
the gardens of cowards
your grave
is far
below

I’ve been through enough
to know silence can be louder than screams.
Enough to know
“I'm fine” usually means
I'm not.

I’ve had nights
where the weight got heavy,
but I held it anyway.
No applause.
No witness.
Just me
and the dark
playing tug-of-war with my peace.

But I never let go.
Even when I wanted to.

There’s a version of me
I used to mourn
the one before the heartbreak,
before the trust got shattered,
before I learned
people only love you
when it's easy.

Now I move slower,
but wiser.
I speak less,
but mean more.
I lost some friends,
but I found my spine.

The ink on my hand
ain’t decoration
it’s declaration.
Proof I’ve made it this far,
even if the road
was more cuts than comfort.

I don’t expect perfect anymore.
Just real.
Just effort.
Just peace that don’t ask me
to shrink to fit inside it.

I’m not healed,
but I’m healing.
Not fearless,
but brave.
Still got days
where I look in the mirror
and ask,
“Am I really built for this?”

And every time,
my reflection answers,
“You really are.”