Things are never easy for anyone,
and I know you've had more than
you're fair share of misfortune
but I've never heard you complain.
If everyone got what they deserved,
you would've grown up with
blue sky in your eyes
instead of dark clouds in your heart.
You didn't ask for your life
to be filled with death and desertion
but the universe isn't prone to
granting requests anyway.
I've never known anyone who
didn't run away from their problems
but you're still in that sorry old house
so maybe you're the first.
You may not let me in anymore
but you still have your own personal
doormat at the gates to the
back of my mind.
I wonder if you still compare yourself
to the peeling wallpaper or the
rusty hinges on the laundry room door.
I used to think you were crazy
for not being able to see the glint
in your eye that the world tried so hard
to beat out.
Whenever I see you around
I try to make sure it's still there.

Darling I hope you understand
when I say you're as beautiful
and dark as the night
I mean you have stars in your eyes
and freedom in your heart.
I mean you hold the deepest secrets
and only speak the truth.
You embrace the lonely who
wander the streets of your soul
and show love to those
shut out by everyone else.
Even the broken bottles
in the corner of your mind
reflect the glow of the moon
to show someone the light.
There are those who revel
in the bright of day
but there are also those
who only find solace
in the black of night.

Blue mountains rise on the horizon
looking like wistful wishes
and disregarded dreams-
If the purple peaks can
scrape the sun,
then surely so can I.

The white wallpaper
and laced curtains
smell like childhood
and pleasant memories,
and when the sun streams
through open windows
I close my eyes,
breathe in high hopes,
and exhale every worry
from the past six months.

In the valleys I gather
the love I left last summer
and tuck it away in my suitcase.
I'll pull it out on a
dreary Kansas day
to remind myself there's a place
that doesn't leave scars.

In my dreams I'm
running my fingers through
the mountain's trees
and in reality
I'm doing the same.

I think I'm getting bad again
I'm thinking all or nothing again
I think my control is slipping again
I think I might not be able to heal again
I think I might do it all this time
So I can finally feel *nothing