#thump
I go to the doctors
just for a checkup,
she puts her hand on my chest to feel my heart.
And at that moment i wonder if she can feel how its broken into a million pieces.
I wonder if she can feel with each thump, another piece breaking off.
I wonder if she can feel all the denial, all the workers in my brain trying to mend those pieces together,
but then it all breaking apart again.
Nov 11, 2024
Nov 11, 2024 at 7:25 PM UTC
Thump
Thump
Thump
Goes the heartbeat
Drip
Drop
Drip
Drop
Drip
Drop
Goes the rain
All the while
I'm sitting
I'm waiting
For the right moment
To say
I i s o
m s y u
- J y
a M
August 24th, 2019
Aug 24, 2019
Aug 24, 2019 at 11:37 PM UTC
thump-thump. thump-thump.
my heart. still beats.
i am. alive.
my blood. still runs.
am i. awake?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump. thump-thump.
thump-thump. thump thump.
my blood. still runs.
i am. alive.
my breath. is quick.
am i. alive?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump. thump-thump.
thump-thump. thump-thump.
my breath. is quick.
i am. alive.
my mind's. racing.
am i. alive?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump. thump-thump.
thump-thump. thump thump.
my mind's. racing.
i am. alive.
my hands. they shake.
am i. alive?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump. thump-thump.
thump-thump. thump-thump.
my hands. they shake.
i am. alive.
i try. to breathe.
am i. alive?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump. thump-thump.
thump-thump. thump-thump.
i try. to breathe.
i am. alive.
i can't. get air.
am i. alive?
or am. i dead?
thump-thump.
thump.
thump.
Apr 11, 2019
Apr 11, 2019 at 10:08 PM UTC
Hearts beat
To the weight of a drum
With a steady beat
Against our palms
You're all I see
In the light of the day
Our pulse thumping
All in one
Apr 2, 2019
Apr 2, 2019 at 7:55 PM UTC
He walks around with a piece of me
And I doubt he even knows
That he carries a fragment of my heart
Wherever it is he goes.
I just wonder if he felt its thump
Or heard its tiny beat
If he’d return it to me carefully
So that I could feel
Complete
Nov 9, 2018
Nov 9, 2018 at 4:51 PM UTC
The ringing, it has been bugging me. Can it please stop?
By the side drawers of the bed, you'll hear a little thump
There's an abrupt pause on my counting, I am not calm
To face the wall of truth, about these delusions in my heart
How many times did this happen again? I am older and is tired
With a mind like mine, common and proud, who would even risk a dime
That in every few people I talk, nobody would listen on how
How the silent pain surrrounds, how it almost makes me laugh
On how I curl into a fetal position, the world, a year apart
It is stupidly pathetic, but I am now a child of lies
A child that has stories, but in deaf ears it dies
For the many times of broken hopes, for a little, I still asked
That maybe I was worth it, maybe. Now it's gone.
Sep 8, 2018
Sep 8, 2018 at 7:02 AM UTC
Warming up like an electric orchestra,
the sound of your dad’s band practice seeped
through the vents from the basement.
Drums vibrated from the floor into my feet,
And we tapped our toes together,
thump thump thump.
Drowning out the 80’s punk, your mom
plays polka in the kitchen, making pasta. I stand
over the sauce stained stove watching the *** of water
sizzle to accordion cries and the idea of clogs. We sway
from side to side. Your hands hang off my hips.
Retreating, back to your blue room, we wait
for the wafting smells of garlic, grilled onions and
peppers to call us for dinner. You pull out your
keyboard, a pen, a pad. Pressing buttons, I hear
synthesizers and song samples through your
headphones. We smile, bobbing our heads in sync,
Bump, bump, bump.
~
Finding myself in a foreign living room,
I am alone. The TV is on mute and a “motivational”
speech muffles through his speakers. There are no
basement bands. No pasta, no polka, or clogs and cries.
Only sounds of silence. I press my feet against the floor.
I can’t hear the bumps, I can’t feel the thumps
Mar 2, 2017
Mar 2, 2017 at 2:18 PM UTC