#restart
don't forget about me
but I don't want to be a scar
don't let me go
but I don't want to be an anchor
am I needed?
am I to be left behind?
I thought I was right
I thought it was friendship
I thought I was past this?
past feeling alone
in a room full of people
I know
don't forget about me
don't let me go
I don't want to restart
again
Feb 27
Feb 27, 2026 at 9:14 PM UTC
It’s better to be fake
Than real.
Yeah, you lose your self,
Your identity,
Your independence,
Your individuality,
But hefty trades,
Sacrifices,
need
To be made
Sometimes.
Because
Code can be rewritten,
Metal can be taken apart
And soldered back together,
Bolts and screws can be
Reattached,
Makeup can be reapplied,
Lies can be retold,
Cheating can be made up for.
It’s much easier to fix
A mistake that
you
Yourself made.
Sep 13, 2025
Sep 13, 2025 at 10:53 PM UTC
Lets feel
'till we all run flat
feel nothing
Take me back
when I could feel
hit the restart button
and it would work.
Jul 3, 2025
Jul 3, 2025 at 1:17 PM UTC
a stop is called
a cold drop to death
and clothe my eyes squint tight
then clear the screen beam into another variant
a ********** (with a new approach)
broaching language
( the previous dud
would never have dared ! )
caring less with vicious rapping
reinvent the day from the perspective
of a new gimmy villain
**** to the experience and bite barking
take two you intolerable people
you intolerable world
the intolerable harking
of the intolerable day
Apr 14, 2025
Apr 14, 2025 at 8:40 PM UTC
i want to cut again
make pretty little lines
i want to take the razor
and make it my demise
i want to cut again
watch the red pour
i want to cut my legs
behind a closed door
see, i used ro cut daily
before my friends found out
i made another promise
"what was that about?"
my parents used to yell at me
my friends used to try
the worst reaction that i got
was seeing Moonbeam cry
i want to cut again
now that moon is gone
i want to hurt again
its really been too long.
Feb 9, 2025
Feb 9, 2025 at 10:30 PM UTC
Trying so hard to get over the past
Left me in a hole far too deep
And now I must face the reality
I never wanted to see
Drowned myself in clouds of smoke
And the pain never seemed to leave
But Im finally reaching the point
Where I am returning to being me
Feb 10, 2024
Feb 10, 2024 at 11:08 PM UTC
Why do I restart my life once a year?
Restrict myself from growing,
Whenever conflict appears
I'm not passionate about anything
Restarting is easier than keeping on.
Even though I just want to be done
I start over
Feb 8, 2024
Feb 8, 2024 at 7:50 AM UTC
that deadened fingernail
first damaged long ago
not quite a lifetime but
time enough
to feel that way
is showing signs of regrowth
partially shrouded but visible
beneath the lingering ruin
the fingertip was caught
ensnared and pressed
more firmly than
could be endured
though care was provided
the bruising ran deep
and undermined any chance
of this body's repair
unexpectedly
and unimaginable
in spite of this layer
of lamented keratin
there stretched forth
a sudden burgeoning
a crescent of cuticle
and lunula
telling of the strength
of the fingernail to come
Jan 2, 2024
Jan 2, 2024 at 7:20 AM UTC
I am that woman
who takes a few steps and then
stands still in the wind
on her face, my skin
feels the world
new, the cherry trees
this walk to the store
on the corner around the corner
cars parked next to the sidewalk
are so much more than the view
of the windows all around, the gardens
chimneys and clouds, the wind
on my face, my heart
touched, pounding
in my throat, three times
I take a deep breath, only then
do I walk along the traffic
away from the cherry trees
to the store on the corner
around the corner
Dec 31, 2022
Dec 31, 2022 at 3:27 AM UTC
Am I supposed to feel like sunrise,
Or smell of freshly cut grass?
Am I supposed smile with my teeth
like white doves in unlocked cages?
Is this supposed to give me hope
Like a baby’s first breath?
And emptying the vacuum?
All I feel is ugly and desperate
Like a mushroom
sprouting from cow ****
Or the fitted sheet
I never put on my bed
I fear if I go back to the beginning
I won’t ever be
Homemade Apple crumble
Lipstick stained skin
Or my favourite Jane Austen book
Not ever again
Sep 26, 2022
Sep 26, 2022 at 2:10 PM UTC
I have been walking in a dark cave
for quite a long time,
Never felt more caged and jailed,
as if I've committed a heinous crime.
Defeated and bruised
from the gold rush,
I heard songs of victory
in your calm and hush.
Little did I know,
I was just passing through,
forgetting all the woes and blues,
I walk towards my gold mine,
Threw all of my lights on the line,
Left my knives by the door, risking my life.
And little did you know,
you wouldn't just walk with me
through the dark,
but would even dance with me
right on my mark.
When I felt like I was
in an eternal night,
you came marching along,
my valiant knight.
Now we walk hand-in-hand,
I can see the light from our land.
Waiting for us there is our *** of gold.
I have all the riches in the world
from your kisses and by your hold.
Jun 8, 2022
Jun 8, 2022 at 10:03 AM UTC
A Broken heart
Has many paths
Many stories that don't part
The shattered pieces
Connecting to another
Value and lessons increases
Getting glued back together
Only to take a chance at love again
Being soft as a feather
Each crack
All different
Some just a deep black
Like an abyss
Too much to attack
To a healing path
That starts with a long hot bath
To take time alone
In order to hone
Your true self in the unknown
A Broken heart is beautiful
That to you, yourself it's suitable
A Broken heart is strong
For all that's been done
Still moves along
A Broken heart is always growing
Not always flowing
But getting through life slowly
A Broken heart
That can't help but to restart
Jan 30, 2022
Jan 30, 2022 at 10:42 PM UTC
How many poems have I writ?
And how easy has the process been?
To think and to conjure from my brain
Unto the printed page,
Ideas and concepts flowing
in a seamless joyous
Tide of vocabulary and
Profusion
Until a while ago.
When everything.
Just.
Stopped.
So what is it?
What is this ******* thing
That circumvents my joy
And my creativity?
Where is it skulking?
Coward! Come forth,
Be fought!
But it would not
Did not
And I did not write,
My pen was silent
But not my creativity,
Until I met some strangers
Who became immediate
Fast friends and true,
I opened up
And ideas flew,
Turns out
The block was that no one actually
Asked me to write,
No one and especially not me!
Well these new friends did,
And the blockage,
In that instant,
Died
And went
And so this verse,
Poor though it be,
And first in quite a while,
Has indeed
Snuck out
Under
The wire
Oct 27, 2021
Oct 27, 2021 at 5:07 AM UTC
Prophecies in the scrying mirror
Something had gone totally awry
I'd taken the wrong prong in the fork
And have been obsessively wondering why
My dreams and intentions were simple
Build a galaxy and life with my love
But he was just a crow painted white
The peaceful milky shade of a dove
This dream must come to a flat line
A ****** from within must ensue
This secret depressions gone on too long
A rewiring and new outlook is due
Aug 3, 2021
Aug 3, 2021 at 12:17 PM UTC
Take your place amongst the brave ones
The take-a-chance ones
The get-up-despite
and try-it-again ones.
Take your place amongst the daughters and sons
living post-lockdown
and let's run.
Mar 27, 2021
Mar 27, 2021 at 8:49 AM UTC
Ito ang umagang
Nanaisin kong huminto muna ang Araw nang saglit.
Kung pwede bang manatili muna Sya
At ako'y hayaang pagmasdan
Ang kanyang kariktan.
Nais kong bumilad sa sinag ng Araw
At magpasakop sa Liwanag Nyang taglay.
Nais kong malusaw ang bawat kamalian,
Ang bawat pagkukunwari.
Pagkat ayoko na..
Ayoko nang magpanggap pa..
Na kaya kong mag-isa
Mag-isa na wala ang mga kamay Nya --
Ang mga gabay Nya.
Na maging sa gabi'y
Nasisilayan ko pa rin
Ang kanyang anino sa aking pagpikit,
Ang nakasisilaw Niyang Liwanag
Na nagiging mitsa ng aking pagluhod.
Gusto kong huminto ang Araw,
At ako'y makita Nya..
Kahit isang iglap..
Kahit isang saglit lang..
Kung pwede lang,
Wag Mo akong iwan
Na sa gabi'y
Ikaw ang magbigay Ilaw sa aking landas
At ako'y Iyong yakapin
Habang ang Iyong sinag
Ang magsisilbing lakas
Sa bawat pagbangon ko sa Umaga.
Sayo ako magsisimula,
At ayokong ito'y magwakas
Na para bang hinahayaan ko lamang
Na malimot ko ang lahat --
Ang lahat ng mga misteryong
Iyong ipinakita na,
Iyong ipanaranas na.
Ayokong dumating sa katapusan
Na ako'y walang muang
Na Ikaw ang aking Simula..
Ayokong magtagpo tayo
Sa gitna ng aking mga kamalian --
Mga kamaliang hindi ko itinama
Kahit na pinagbuksan Mo na ako
Sa panibagong Umaga.
Kung ang bawat araw na lumilipas
Ay siya ring mga pahina ng aking buhay,
Bakit pa..
Bakit ko pa hahayaang
Dilim ang magsilbing umaga?
Kung Ikaw naman ang tunay na Simula ng lahat..
Kung landas ko nama'y
Kayang-kaya **** bigyang liwanag
At lahat ng masasaklawan ng aking mga mata
Ay simbolo ng Iyong paghahari.
Lilikumin Mo ang lahat
Gamit ang Iyong Liwanag.
Ang Iyong mga Salita'y
Hindi na mangungusap pa,
Ngunit Ikaw na mismo ang darating.
At buhat sa Iyong bibig,
Ang lahat ay handa nang makinig..
Nang buong puso..
Na may tunay na pagpapasakop.
At ang lahat ng mga naggising
Buhat sa pagkakahimbing
At mga bangungot na tila walang katapusan
Ay sabay-sabay na babangon
At lalakad sa Liwanag na Iyong hain.
Masisilayan ko rin ang mga ngiti
Ng pagpupunyagi at tagumpay
Na walang balot ng anumang pagkukunwari,
Walang tampo't galit.
Kung saan hubad ang lahat
Ngunit tanggap Mo
Ang bawat kamalian.
Ang Iyong paghuhusga ay darating --
Darating nang patas;
Patas at pawang katotohanan.
Ang lahat ay darating sa katapusan,
At Sayo ay handang magpaubaya.
Ang lahat ng mga nabago ng Iyong Liwanag
Ay kusang sisibol at uusbong
Nang may papuri
At hindi parang mga paupos na kandila
Na nauubusan rin ng lakas.
Ngunit sila'y tila mga tanim
Na Iyong dinidiligan sa bawat araw --
Mga ginintuang araw
Na hindi gaya ngayong kukupas din..
Balang araw, ang lahat ng salitang
Mamumutawi sa bawat labi'y
May iisang sigaw
May iisang palamuti na ibabandera
At susuko sa Iyong kabutihan.
Ang bawat nilalang
Ay mabinihag sa Iyong kaluwalhatian
At hindi na..
Hindi na mauubusan pa ng Liwanag,
Ikaw mismo ang magkukusang
Punasan ang mga matang lumuluha,
Lumuluha buhat sa paghihintay..
Pagkat nariyan ka na..
Nariyan na ang Iyong kaligtasan.
Ikaw, sa bawat oras
Sa bawat sandali'y
Ikaw pa rin ang maging dahilan
Ng pagtibok ng aking puso
Ang magiging sigaw
Ng aking napapaos na lalamunan.
Ikaw ang maging dahilan..
Ng aking pagtaas ng kamay
At sa ere'y hindi Mo ako iiwan,
Ni hindi Mo ako kinalimutan..
Ikaw, ang Araw at Gabi..
Sayo ang aking papuri!
Jan 11, 2021
Jan 11, 2021 at 11:29 PM UTC
At your life
Analyze mistakes
Shake off your guilt
Reality is the truth
Wishing to start new
with your baggage
Or lift yourself up
With the experienced You
It's never too late
(c)near_lane7
Nov 13, 2020
Nov 13, 2020 at 6:56 AM UTC
It has been such a Long time since our last incarnation such like reassembly.
We’ve been scrubbing our United States
and leasing places
as scarification and other humans‘ faces
of stories,
to bless or gargle foreign.
We’ve been to the Neptune’s Fountain to find Young Man Hogan’s bench situated within all those loners’ speedy extroversion,
and catch the Saint Petersburg bell that hitchhiked the church there
to make a glimpse of urbanism and the world’s history replaced
by just one journal
and one fella’s pencil
swerving greatly.
Still,
the words are still trying,
flexing,
to fit their whole ends
into shoes they should have taken off
already, a long time ago,
and that‘s this somewhere
where we could say:
crossroads decide their fruition.
And it comes to realisation:
faces,
screens,
bruises,
droppings,
chilling entries,
work,
how I remade the word “naked”of one thousand and one nights
under my tiny silky
cloak
-
it has been nothing but a play
for the day when I’ll write,
and the Life,
that will take on my own skin
one way or another.
One paper corner will meet with the other.
Departures are all eventually just fun geese’s bump in another flight of a night.
Nov 9, 2020
Nov 9, 2020 at 11:01 AM UTC
"hello, what is your name?"
the familiar vibration in my ears
that creeps its way into my blood
a buzz
a hum
constant
beneath my skin
when days were louder
like the crash of pots and pans
in my grandmother's house
where the ceiling was littered with butterflies
like the static from empty radio stations
akin to that of crunching snow
and the harsh grating of metal
they are the memories dipped in sepia
and overexposed flashes of light
dripping as they walk on
leaving footprints
a silhouette
it is the fear of our wrinkling hands that drive us closer to the edge
to the end
as the sun and moon rewind in a never ending cycle
a loop
right before a leap of faith
towards that never ending youth
the desperate sliver of summer at the end of a blurry december's haze
when nothing is recognisable
a restart
"hello, what is your name?"
Nov 8, 2020
Nov 8, 2020 at 12:56 AM UTC
The thin glistening needle threads
back and forth,
back and forth.
As the black thread slowly tangles in a knot
It twists and turns through each circle,
creating a lump in the center,
stoping the artist in their track,
forcing them to ponder on the black thread.
Should they continue?
Or should they stop,
cut the string and restart,
unwind new thread,
And strain their eyes again?
Sep 28, 2020
Sep 28, 2020 at 12:30 AM UTC
all of a sudden
its her vivid memories
that started to fade
like a photograph
captured in a camera
in grayscale effect
{ l.m.l.b }
Sep 24, 2020
Sep 24, 2020 at 11:00 AM UTC
i just ate dinner
now i'm a new person
can we start over?
nice to meet you.
Aug 8, 2020
Aug 8, 2020 at 11:32 PM UTC
Today
I am reminded that I am hated
That I am never good enough
That my past mistakes will forever haunt me
That repenting is a waste of time
That I will forever be judged by my sins
Tomorrow
I shall remind myself that I am loved more
That I am good enough
That I learned from my past mistakes
That repenting brings me closer to God
That I will instead be judged by how much I learned from my sins
Jun 28, 2020
Jun 28, 2020 at 10:29 AM UTC