#provision
Being in pain doesn’t
make you
a
better
man.
I’d think that you
of all people
would understand.
For the record,
for all the damage that you have
brought upon yourself.
While they testified the evil
you are made of,
you ran away and hid yourself in a room,
locked
up.
For the record,
for all of the venom you
took instead of help.
Lay the lonely
down
to
rest.
Of us all, they were amongst
the worst
and the best.
I just wish that
someone else had reached out,
and you would have
had the courage to take their
hand.
Don’t talk to me.
Don't tell me who you are.
I don’t think I can handle
any
more
scars.
It was never your fault
that they set such
a
high
bar.
I used to think that lonely men
could be saved.
I told it to myself;
it was a fact,
plain as day.
He couldn’t
be,
they couldn’t
be
saved.
May 13
May 13, 2026 at 7:53 AM UTC
Kasabay ng aking pagpikit
Ang pagsilip ko sa panaginip sa aking isipan.
Namumukod tangi ang Iyong kagandahan
At Ikaw ang nag-iisang kumikinang sa aking paningin.
Napapasilip ako
Sa likod ng lahat ng napakagandang palamuti,
Pagkat nariyan pala ang tunay na may-akda ng lahat.
Pagkat sa kabila ng naghihiyawang palakpakan,
Sa kabila ng mga ngiting bumabandera sa aking harapan --
Ang dahilan ng aking kalakasan.
Pagdilat ko'y tila bukang-liwayway na,
Hindi kumupas ang Iyong kagandahan.
Muli kong kinapa ang aking bulsa,
At muling naghagilap ng anumang umiingay sa aking kalupi.
Dahan-dahan kong pinakiramdaman
Ang magaspang na katauhang gawa sa pilak.
At buhat sa pagkakamulat,
Ay dahan-dahan akong pumikit
Na tila ba sumasabay sa unang pagpatak ng ulan.
Nangungusap sa aking konsensya
Ang tinig **** matagal ko nang hanap-hanap.
At sa naudlot na istorya sa entablado'y
Nagpatuloy ang aking paghahanap.
Hinahanap ko kung saan nagmumula
Ang tinig **** humihele sa akin
At nagbibigay galak sa puso kong
Uhaw sa malasakit at pag-ibig na tunay.
Nasaksihan ko ang paglisan ng bawat katauhang
Kailan lamang ay nasa akin ang pagtingin,
Ngunit ang lahat pala sa kanila'y
Syang palamuti at hindi tunay na kabahagi
Ng aking istorya.
Patuloy silang nalusaw
Gaya ng krayolang nilalaro ko sa apoy
Noong ako'y paslit pa lamang.
Na ang akala kong bubuhay sa pinipinta kong larawan
Ay hindi pala sapat sa magandang imaheng
Aking nasasaklawan sa aking imahinasyon.
Kusa silang naglaho na tila ako'y tinakbuhan lamang
At marahan akong napaluhod buhat sa aking kinatatayuan.
Gusto kong magsalita, gusto kong may masambit..
Gusto ko silang pigilan sa paglisan
Pagkat hindi ko ninais na mapag-isa
At patuloy na mangulila sa pagmamahal.
Kung pwede lang na sa gitna ng katahimikang ito'y
Kaya kong marinig ang sarili kong boses.
Kung pwede lang sa gitna ng aking paghihintay at pagsusumamo'y
Wag muna silang kumilos at aking mahanap
Ang tinig na akala kong susundo sa akin
Buhat sa paglimot ko sa aking sarili..
Namukod-tangi ang boses na aking hinahanap,
Naririnig ko na ang Kanyang mga yapak
Na tila ba patungo at palapit na sa akin.
Ngunit hindi ako makagalaw buhat sa pagkakayuko.
Ni hindi ko na masilayan pa kung sino ba ang paparating.
At dahan-dahan pa rin ang pagpadyak
Ng Kanyang sandalyas patungo sa akin.
At habang Siya'y lumalakad,
Ay dahan-dahan ding nagbago ang senaryo
Na aking kinalalagyan.
Narinig ko ang napakalakas na pagpaubaya ng alon,
Ang tunog ng kampanang magaan sa aking pakiramdam,
At ang mga humiheleng tila mga anghel
Na naging mitsa ng pagtatayo ng aking balahibo.
"Nasaan na nga ba ako?" Tanong ko sa aking sarili.
At muli kong narinig ang mga nagpupuring anghel
Na tila ba walang katapusan ang kanilang galak
At ako'y nadadala kung saan.
Hindi ko pa rin mabuksan ang aking mga mata
At wala akong masilayan maliban sa dilim
Na pilit kong nilalabanan at alisan.
Hinahanap ko pa rin ang tinig Nya
At nais kong tanggapin ang bawat salita mula sa Kanyang bibig.
Maya-maya pa'y narinig ko
Ang isang pamilyar na boses na tumawag sa aking, "Anak."
Habang ang aking kamay ay hawak-hawak pa rin
Ang pilak na muli ko sanang itatapon sa balon..
"Anak, halika na.. sabi ng doktor, may donor ka na raw.."
Sambit ng aking ina habang ako'y akap-akap
Sa kanyang mga maiinit na mga bisig.
Kusang tumulo ang aking mga luha
At sya nama'y humagulgol sa saya.
Walang salita ang sinambit naming dalawa,
Ngunit ang kanyang yakap ay humigpit.
At naramdaman ko ang kanyang mga luhang
Dumadampi sa aking balikat at sa aking damit.
At sa mga oras na iyo'y
Ang kanyang yakap ay higit pa sa lahat ng yakap sa mundo
Ang luha nya'y tila ba binabalot ng isang hiwagang
Nagpapakalma sa aking paghihirap.
Ang gaan ng aking pakiramdam,
Ang saya ng aking kalooban.
At doon ko natagpuan ang aking hinahanap,
At sa aking muling pagmulat
Kung saan may liwanag nang maaaninag,
Alam ko kung kanino na ako muling lalapit pa..
Alam ko, hindi ko man nasilayan ang lahat
Ngunit ang pakiramdam na iyo'y
Habambuhay kong nanaisin
At pasasalamatan.
Jan 13, 2021
Jan 13, 2021 at 1:16 AM UTC
Endless bounty,
knows no yield;
in rotting garbage,
or fertile field.
Atop the hill,
daily bread is carved.
While down in the valley,
I wander and starve.
Taking shelter,
in the moors and heath.
I shiver and struggle,
to find comfort or sleep.
Dusk soon fades,
the sky jet-black and stark.
My bed of peat,
dew drops, and marsh.
Morning sun:
scorching and cruel.
I hope for a morsel,
some water or gruel.
I saunter weary,
eyes sunken and hollow.
The world is alive,
the birds chorus I follow.
Spared from the sun,
under a thicket or copse.
Sharp pangs of hunger
choke out all hope
Such a fortune given,
so ill a fate.
Forlorn and wretched,
is forever my state
With strength from the Heavens,
I crawl to your door.
You greet this sad beggar,
with contempt and scorn.
I ask for salvation,
eyes hopeful and glazed.
But I am given no shelter,
nor provision, or grace.
Cast out in the rain,
sodden and cold.
My limbs are weary,
My mind in tumult.
Providence! provide,
Heed my desperate prayer!
Above the stars shine,
my refugee from despair.
I await my death,
If God's grace would bestow;
but I awaken again,
with hunger in tow.
Again I venture,
to your door for fare.
But another has answered,
and pushes back my hair.
Face caked with dirt,
streaked with hot tears,
they run down my cheeks
like raindrops so clear.
My shawl drenched,
my garments of grime.
I'm given bread and milk,
a warm fire and wine.
I am thankful to them, and my Lord,
to have a bed, dry shoes,
fresh clothing, and chores.
New days are ahead!
Such joy and ardor.
No longer do I rest,
in the heath or the moor.
Aug 9, 2020
Aug 9, 2020 at 9:52 AM UTC
I feel my heart strengthening
I feel Your presence
in this quiet place
You matter God
You urge me forwards
You welcome me in
I cry,
"It's so hard to let go!"
You say, "Fly"
but I'm scared of heights?
You say, "Fly"
but what if I fall?
You say, "Not for long,
you will fly,
you will soar."
but I'm scared...
You say, "Rose, have I ever let you down?
Have I ever left you alone?
Other people have,
but I am
God."
Oct 18, 2018
Oct 18, 2018 at 4:21 AM UTC
Broken hands
Broken hearts
Oh, how I come apart
Your presence so sweet
I ache for you
I cry out Your name
"Why is it so hard?"
Among all the clanging
I hear your call
even in the chaos of space
I hear your call
through different voices
I hear you calling me back
"I will provide"
Come back home my sweet daughter
Let me love you
put your faith in me
lean on me
You are known
and
You are heard
Oct 18, 2018
Oct 18, 2018 at 4:05 AM UTC
#*grace on a birch branch
a pair of silky redbreasts
among red buds of spring
no worry about tomorrow
for God feeds them today
and clothes them as kings*#
Dec 6, 2015
Dec 6, 2015 at 5:03 PM UTC
Thank you Lord for the gift of your love, and beauty, your power and your humility especially in the blessed sacrament of the most Holy Eucharist. It is here that you hide both in plain sight and reveal your divinity and humanity in a most profound and personal way. It is here that you meet us and here that you greet us as we fall on our knees to pray. You give us the sun to welcome us at dawn and send angels to guard at the end of the day. There is always something new and timely every time I am before you in this place. And every time I come away with a brand new look at your face. I look forward to the times we have together with such anticipation and afterwards am filled with jubilation! Help me cling to you, help me sing to you. In troubled seasons help me hold fast, and in stressful moments help me to relax. In sadness I ask for peace and the strength to rejoice, when I have a difficult decision help me to discern and make a good choice. We pray to you, we bring all we are to you. Our joys, sorrows, longings, praises and petitions. Give us eyes to see you, ears to hear you, a mind to seek you and a heart to love you. Help us also to see, hear, seek, and love others as you do for all of them and for each of us.
We ask this and all things in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Amen!
Jul 21, 2017
Jul 21, 2017 at 8:18 PM UTC
A Woman Will Wear Her Emotions On Her Sleeve, You Can See Her Feelings On Her Face. So If A Woman Dedicates Herself To Her Man By Providing Him With Loyalty And Trust, The Man In Return Should Give Her The Satisfaction Of Knowing That No Woman Out There Is Capable Of Replacing Her.
Nov 3, 2016
Nov 3, 2016 at 3:09 PM UTC
(Jesus) You Are
You are a light in the darkness and hope in despair
You are a friend when it seems no one else cares
You lift me up when I am down, you are strong when I am weak
When I am scared and alone it is you that I seek
It is you that I run to or sometimes just crawl
When it's too much to bear and I can't carry it all
You take it away or give me grace and strength to endure
Nothing will happen today that you and I can't handle together I am assured
I trust you Lord, but I often doubt
Sometimes I wish you wouldn't whisper, you'd shout
My faith, like young legs, are eager but unsteady
You tell me to take a leap of faith and fly, but I'm not sure I'm ready
You are the wind beneath my wings
You lift me up so I can soar
In you I experience what true joy and peace brings
I live like the mountains grounded yet reaching
Like the mighty trees who drop roots to drink deep of life giving springs
Help me thirst mightily for your teachings and the water of life
You are my healer when I'm injured, a sword to help me fight
You go before me as a shield you're angels guard me through the night
Sometimes I can't understand the wisdom of your plan
I am small and I am only one and I don't know that I can
The future is uncertain and I don't know what's in store
But Jesus be my shepherd and I'll want for nothing more
AMEN
Jun 3, 2016
Jun 3, 2016 at 9:59 PM UTC
You are an angel sent from heaven to us
You are a gift for which we are grateful and by which we're blessed
There is a purpose a plan a place just for you
The world had a need and from the beginning God knew
The perfect time the perfect family to raise you as their own
To look back ta amazing to see how much you've grown
From the little baby girl to the young woman you are today
For all the missions throughout time and for you I dare to pray
That you would know God's providence and provision
The Lord provided us with you and now to the world given
By your love and your light to you they shall be drawn
Hold them close and take them in let them hear your heartsong
You are a gift from heaven sent down upon the earth
To show every man woman and child what a human life is worth
For this and many other reasons I think of you at night
And ask the Lord to hold you close and keep you always in his sight.
Feb 6, 2016
Feb 6, 2016 at 1:39 AM UTC