#profane
Is it just another part of the human condition to suffer from such an affliction as lifelong addiction that sprouts from these crazy family traditions?
This is some habitat, cozy little cabbage patch, where bad ideas are known to hatch. No brag just fact I'm attempting to walk out unscathed my intergerity still intact.
In this cataphract chaos I knowingly attract. How do you expect me to react. I brace myself for the impact. Feeling like from all angles I'm being attacked. The odds are against me like a deck that's been stacked
I felt like I was being laughed at so I just kind of snapped. It's all just part of my handicap. I'm Nothing but a maniac that always ends up in combat staring off into the abstract, usually finding myself in another mishap. Inside my mind I've been trapped. If I had just napped I could've avoided all this crap, but luck would have it I'm an insomniac
Right here in these ungodly places where I am out of reach of God's good graces. I come off a sinner that is faithless being chased by these ghosts that are faceless. Ask me no questions and no lies will I sell. Turning in full circles till I'm feeling rather unwell as I dance with the devil in the moonlight pale
chaos and the very creation the ends up breaking my concentration wicked thoughts come to contemplation everyday arises a new complication Can you alter your perception with out so much as a question? If you do not recognize your own reflection are you perfectly ****** up or ****** up to perfection?
right from the very start heavy weighs these matters of the heart I could possibly still light up the dark if you just strike me and see where I ******* spark.
Just laying in my bed, drenched in the scents of *** and sweat, I am a basket case as well as a space cadet distraught over things that haven't even happened yet.
Lost in my own thoughts that rattle around in my skull quite loud, hiding in this shadow inside this cloud. If you want to find out **** around As I stand here all alone on what looks like a battleground Silence a deafening sound. **** it I ain't ever coming down.
I'm traveling outside the parameters of my own **** mind searching for something that I doubt I'll ever find To **** things up I am quite inclined. since I am constantly lost in sinister dark stumbling blind, bound to these ties that bind
Lately the thoughts in my head leave me saddened
horrors relived that most couldn't have never even imagined
I am feeling a little bit stagnant
kind of like a **** magnet
life's been hell but somehow I've managed, even though it has left me sitting here all dark and damaged.
I tried to spill the secrets that overload my very soul,
Trying my dead level best not to lose my self control
I'm just Broken vessel, I'm just an empty hull
Like I am going to a masqade I tend to mask what I feel, Like I hide the scars and these wounds that never seem to heal.
My turmoil and my tranquility mix just like my pleasure and my pain. I am only considered to be completely crazy when I go sane
I have stayed up all night long hitting the **** like it was a normal thing to do, but don't look at me that way because truth be told you know you have done it too.
So I pray to God on bent knee to love me and guide me to always be beside me, and not let temptations lead me astray. my tragic skies are dismal and grey, All to frequently I find myself with no one in which I could confide these dark thoughts of suicide. As chaos and catastrophe seem to collide
To error is human but to forgive is divine. Like frog hair split 379 ways I swear, I'm fine. I maybe a little bit out of my rabbit *** mind. Living with the memories that serve only to remind me my past I cannot simply leave behind
I am still stuck in beast mode. It's possible I mean I think I am about to overdose. Here searching for the antidote.
Things haven't quite gone as I had hoped, No I haven't been coaxed, nor have I been coached. I am now here forever shadowed as I lock and I load. I didn't make it out but almost!
How do people keep living on in complete ignorance. Everything went up in smoke in a instance, It has been personal experience to pray for my own deliverance.
If I had other intentions I doubt it would make a difference
So I am just out here reeking havoc and running amuck spitting out these chunks of my ******* broken luck. I'm out in this storm attempting to get myself thunderstruck, while counting all the ways I can self destruct. If I do I am ****** if I don't I am ******
washing over me is this crimson tide Keeping all my feelings shoved way down deep inside I wish that this pain would just subside. What am I going to do next? I just cannot seem to decide. Looking in from right outside as if I ended up stuck in my kryptonite This **** just does not even seem to be right. It's just another ordinary night where I outpour my soul with every word I write
After all the things that had been sacrificed how could someone go on feeding on their host like a parsite. the flames inside this hell just seemed to ignite Anger erupting exploding like dynamite. So what I brought a knife to a gunfight I am definitely Psyched Don't make me cut you from ******* to appetite. I will swallow down all the Cyanide before they could get me for homicide. Tell me now are you ******* satisfied
May 10
May 10, 2026 at 5:15 AM UTC
It's so easy to feel lost, when all you have are ****'ty thoughts.
But why should you care?
To you, those ****'ty thoughts just as well be, like unanswered prayers,
rejected and sent elsewhere.
A place far from there, but not anywhere near over here, but just down the road from everywhere.
Where you lean the seat back, prepare not to care because you're now well aware that you're on the road, that's going nowhere.
One wrong turn, never to return, without a single concern that your destined to crash and burn.
You'll never **** learn! You're in deep **** now!
In total despair!
How will you ever get out? From under this pile of doubt.
But i doubt if, self doubt lets you figure that one out,
that anywhere but here is a good place to pout.
Pout it out, elsewhere and go the **** somewhere else!
There's a place, you go there, try to figure it out.
That nowhere is now here, Do you know where here is?
Here is just somewhere, wherever you are,
here is always here, always has been here.
Somewhere where there isn't.
There is no escape from here, there is nowhere to go,
so now find somewhere that is near here that makes you feel safe. Not just anywhere though,
cause at anytime your fear could scare you ****less,
be terrified by anything that's anywhere near here,
so look for anywhere else that you know is there,
somewhere besides nowhere, like somewhere else.
I do know what would make me happy, though.
If you go, elsewhere,
it's far the **** enough away from me for me not to know where you are,
wherever you are, there you are.
Are you even **** there?
From where you're standing, you're here,
and there's nowhere better than to be here.
Whenever you're here, your somewhere where you can be yourself,
help yourself, love oneself.
Look, i can perch myself up on this shelf, but then i fell.
Yell at an inanimate object. Tell it to go **** itself and i didn't care a bit how it felt.
I can just say **** it to my health. Let it all go, and the **** with this,
it's taking to long to **** die,
hurry the **** up, wake me the **** up before i do actually try.
If left to itself, oneself, can hate myself, and do it all by yourself.
Please stop oneself from choking the **** out of myself, so it doesn't **** you.
You can do **** anything and everything that you could ever dream of whenever you're here.
Around here it is just swell.
Just don't tell on yourself.
Secrets oneself keeps from himself, yourself already knows,
and I didn't even tell myself, what the **** ever you never did before,
before you never even did it.
Because your gonna live forever and you've never been so sure?
Everything has always been what you've been looking for.
But I've everywhere to collect.
Everything from everyone and everyone around everywhere gave me everything to.
I even collected from everyone else.
I have the whole **** World. And it's all **** mine.
I played every game. I won every prize.
I didn't learn from my mistakes. I never even tried.
I ****ed the whole world away, and i did it faster than God,
took me only a day.
I'm only human. And i am afraid, that
i may not learn from every mistake.
I don't know what i am doing. but that's okay,
cause i like it that way.
It's okay to not feel shame. **** everything,
I ****ed it all the way the way that i wanna **** things.
Save yourself the disappointment, some things are better left broken.
If it's ****ed just leave it alone,
if ignored and with patience, the smart thing to do would be wait for it to work itself out.
Besides, i know of no one that knows how to un **** something.
I know none of this is real, and yes you really can die in your dreams.
Just **** watch me.
It's my dream and I'm gonna **** it up, my way.
I do feel a little better now?
But i used to get so obsessed whenever I'd beat a dead horse until i felt better inside.
It took forever for anything to change in me, but never for the better.
Hours and hours go by each time,
I'd beat the **** out of that horse, try to beat it more and more every **** time.
But i got this idea from myself. I must have **** lied.
Now i feel like plucking the wings off of flies,
just to watch them die.
Old Yeller was no friend of mine, is it any wonder why i never **** cried.
And i found where Waldo was trying to hide,
he was trying to hide, wearing some dumb **** disguise,
he was trying to hide from himself in the mirror, left himself scared out of his **** mind.
I couldn't stop laughing, **** i almost died.
And for some ****ed up reason, something compelled me to open the door
to my cell,
and let myself out.
Off to hell i go,
to rebel and hope to hell that when I'm inside of myself, while I'm inside of hell,
i pray for ****s sake, that my makeup won't melt.
Don't forget the trip you took last year to somewhere.
Now that's the place to be. It's always good to be somewhere.
Those prayers did get sent somewhere. Right down the road from nowhere.
They went somewhere else.
They're right there, suspended in mid air.
How **** unfair!
Time to beware of the nightmare to come,
of being nowhere.
You're lost where you don't know where, Where is at.
But now you're here, where else would you be?
You can't be where you've already been.
You've been everywhere.
Everywhere that you went, is now here,
wherever you have been?
You're so tired from everywhere that you went,
not feeling much worth because you've been spent.
All **** used up. You're starting to bend.
Where the **** have you been?
You never made it to the end.
Everywhere you already went.
I'm sure there was somewhere around or near there.
You asked for directions from everyone. Everywhere.
I even asked everyone else that was everywhere else.
You did everything you could here, to never go anywhere but here,
and give anything to not be everywhere else.
Anytime, now's the time or for the rest of forever.
When the **** ever?
Never, ever in the time that it takes forever, has anyone ever been,
that ****ed in the head or care to, not care that they're headed almost anywhere,
full-bore, pedal to the **** floor. Speeding right the **** past the road that nowhere goes.
It goes straight the **** to anywhere,
anywhere you want someplace to end up.
It will even lead you to everywhere, even somewhere where you feel you belong.
Not a place like nowhere that feels totally wrong,
if ya want to go everywhere, that's too much going on. It will just string you along.
Or else, if you just want some space, to get away. Elsewhere is a good place.
If you're in Elsewhere, get out, get a map, find somewhere else besides Elsewhere to go.
Or else where you go you will just be somewhere else, looking for somewhere to go.
So follow your map, don't fall for the trap,
cause Elsewhere don't care that you live in despair.
And now you're lost. Seeking anywhere and everywhere to go,
but the road to nowhere is the only way, to find some road somewhere. To go somewhere else,
or else ya gonna be back in Elsewhere, in total despair,
to someone's else it may not be sad, or that it's not that unfair,
but you got lost yourself and no one else really **** cares.
You can forget about what happened today.
Lost nowhere? You don't know where?
But you were there?
so you head on down the road, wanting to go somewhere else.
For someplace to go.
But now you're here, here is where you are.
At least you are here and it's somewhere to be.
Better than being somewhere else,
like lost not knowing if you were here, there, or why you were even somewhere else.
You're **** head starts to spin! You can't remember if you were coming or going?
If you are here or way the **** over there?
But your stinking thinking starts in, sinking in.
You're ****ed,
don't know if you're somewhere else, or somewhere, like Elsewhere.
It was all too much of a trip. Will you ever be the same?
© 6 mins ago profane • humor • rhyme • misc • adult
Mar 18
Mar 18, 2026 at 2:48 PM UTC
That dark desire clouds your mind
It whispers something profane
Asking for pleasure that bind
Filthy corruption and bane.
Dec 12, 2024
Dec 12, 2024 at 10:54 AM UTC
Life gives us challenges that we must face and eventually conquer. As I stare off into the wild blue yonder. These deep heavy thoughts i tend to ponder. Like how absence makes the heart grow fonder. I can not seem to defeat the creatures I did conjure. I think I'm a ****** goner. At least I'll know i went out with honor. My ghosts Im still attempting to conquer.
Maybe if I were just a little bit stronger I could hold on a little bit longer.
Angels do not follow where it is I dare to go, dark is the deadened cold place inside my barren soul. Here hidden in these shadows of sinister dark, I stab myself with jagged bits of my broken heart. I am going to do just what I want, Don't give a **** Sitting here spitting out the pieces of my broken luck
Am bombarded by images and voices not meant to last. Here I am fading and I am certain I am fading fast.
I am a broken vessel a mere empty shell harboring all those secrets I can never tell, Ask me no questions and no lies will I sell..
I let my hopes just slip from my fingertips, a rose silvered here in the moons eclipse. There is nothing that I can do when I feel alone and out of place except let mascara streaked tears fall down my face.
Don't stand there and tell me how to live my life, suicide or homicide as I grip the butcher knife ?
am I really strong appearing to stand tall or if I move do you think I'll probably fall.
Suicide isn't painless and there are monsters that are real, you don't know me nor do you know how I feel.
I watch as their blood starts to congeal. These bodies I must now conceal. Everything seems to be so surreal. It was probably definite overkill.
My steady hands have been seen slightly shaking hell I can't even remember all the drugs that I am taking. The problems that lately I've been creating. Is more than a little intimidating.
To ease the pain that lives inside my soul, I soothe the savage beast with loud rock and roll. Impossible I have been to console. I've gone now to place where Pretty flowers once did grow. I have to reap what I did sew.
I have shattered just like ******* glass. If you aren't helping me up, then you can kiss my ******* *** alone in this world of **** trying to force myself into places I just don't fit. Like an astronaut I blast right off into space. A lost cause A head case, what a waste.
I am spirit that was destine to just be free. Not trying to be anybody but me. I am not really quite sure who that is supposed to be. I'm assuming it's a completely different version of me.
Watch as this sharpened Steele blade slides across my skin, I trying to vanquish demons that reside within. The air perfumed with the scents of *** and sin. Here we ******* go again. Not your foe, but I am a fiend my friend. Spinning in circles has become the newest trend
I am a legend my fathers legacy they say, I have a hard time believing things will be ok. As of this time and this place it's all discord, and everything is in disarray
I am pretending that there is nothing wrong as I stare off into nothing as I hit the **** I do my best to just keep moving on. At this impasse I have stood entirely too long. I am already gone.
when I smoke I smoke strong blowing clouds thick as hell. I am a bit twisted if you couldn't tell. I move slowly trying not to fall into these worlds that somehow parallel. Spinning in circles, I spin like a top, now I feel rather unwell. I ******* tried it was an epic fail. An attempt I wasted. It was was no avail.
Demented and perverse. I am Explicit and profane. Im also sincere and insane. I only go crazy when I go sane. I'm still here still writhing in pain. I still miss my cousin Billy Wayne.
I am on another plane. I am in a different dimension. It might be easier on you if you would just pay attention. In a text message I can read intention. I welcome the King of all King's divine intervention. Actively I am currently seeking redemption.
Hole in my dark dead soul so incomplete I just feel do not feel whole I twist this **** bowl as I spiralling faster out of control. The pain and sorrow I just can not let go. The older that I grow I become the much more corrupt, I am cold. Lock and reload. You're **** straight I am feeling quite bold. Tottering on the brink of another psychotic episode. I break wide open as I implode. Like laundry I know when to fold.
Above me in these tragic skies these dark angry grey clouds forebode. Like a volcano sometimes erupt. I explode. I wasn't even listening so i can't do as I was told. Your **** straight if you think I sm throwed.
At a snail's pace I move forward because I just plain refuse to go ******* straight. Save me from myself don't make me laugh for that it's already too late. In my wake i leave everything on complete devastate. The **** things I sometimes seem to contemplate.
Nothing is around here but air and opportunity truthfully. What happens when you start a mutiny ruefully, stupidly As usual I am just standing here uselessly. Too bad I don't have the energy to put in the elbow grease and ingenuity.
It's a ******* travesty. A downright tragedy. That so dramatically someone could throw another person from a balcony, rather casually. It was done so callously an unexcusable casualty. A brutality, a formality, of another type of abnormality. In reality it is a fantastic fatality.
I must admit. I guess I could ******* possibly, Maybe, be a little bit crazy. Although you are quite out of your rabbit *** mind. Time you simply can not rewind. Nor can you travel back through time. Continuously seeking treasures I doubt I'll ever find. Out in the sinister darkness of the night I pretty much strolling blind. To **** **** up I am more than a little inclined. To error is completely human but to forgive is divine.
Nov 19, 2024
Nov 19, 2024 at 5:11 PM UTC
A new found enjoyment, not heaven sent
Still drawn to it like a moth to a flame
Don't share in my regret, promise to stay distant
I couldn't bare to see you in this much pain
Find me ambivalent to some extent
To take another step if it's in vain
Notice I'm hesitant to place a bet
L's stack shame on top of shame atop my name
Life itself's a debt, lest we forget
The plot and grave are one in the same
A dark passenger resident denise me residence
How did I lose access to my own brain
To myself I'm a threat, morality bent
Just so I'm not always going against the grain
Don't care 'bout bein' relevant, never permanent
But pain finds a way to remain
No clue what it meant is a poor argument
Would rather not waste time trying to explain
One day you might get it, wouldn't count on it
Strange to be your very own ball and chain
Go 'head and attempt it, see no safety net
You WILL become one with the terrain
Flesh and bone, neck and neck racing to pavement
Then witness the insane riddled membrane
Always defiant, against my better judgement
Probably should have stayed in my own lane
No deterrent to embracing my inner deviant
A full embrace of the profane
Won't seek atonement, least not at the moment
I only wish the only option was to remain
There's a death certificate, a signed suicide document
The growing black mark on my heart is more than a stain
So here I sit, trying to make sense of it
Unknown, alone and forgotten out in the rain
Selfimprisonment, a life sentence recipient
The issues with my DNA, infecting every strain
©2023
May 13, 2023
May 13, 2023 at 9:22 PM UTC
It’s not even all that entertaining anymore.
There has to be something now to really, really shake things up.
Human beings are all so tiresome.
I deal with this illusion only by necessity, not at all by choice.
Though, I am so grateful, in a sense. I love everything; I do.
But in another sense, I see how dead it all is and I abhor it.
How do I love the **** too and leave it go past,
just like luxuries tempted?
Show me pure peace as a way of life.
This is how I wish to spend my human life:
In Peace
with Peace
for Peace
by Peace
as Peace.
Jan 18, 2022
Jan 18, 2022 at 11:42 AM UTC
head to toe kissing
I the mundane
moonlight madnesses, a possessive noun,
commissions gravitational pulls that disobey and obey
laws of interstellar loving. The antique modalities once and forever, forever laying still, stilled in places of antiquities and historical need, are thundershower and hail rudely reawakened, the undertow of
pull and push, the yanking hands of need for others, for others,
it’s the explosive-knowledge, the opening of the old kitbag of perpetual principles, that crazy head to toe kissing is no less necessary, more so, than the computation of the total breaths mundane, unnoticed even now as I write of them, that we will count from that very first, in deed, they are one and the same, like the same
kisses given from head to toe
II the profane
at the first, the body insists, I am but a long haul trailer, no taxi me,
cargo and passengers, are my quatrain accompaniments,
traveling companions boon, my own toons, too soon disembarked,
songs of parents and lovers, children and others, your visage passed
without your permission, but with your happy encouragement,
to generations that will see things that futurists dare not
even mention, but the profane urge to warn them all, kisses from head to toe, elevates, and overcomes...so when most of my names dusted with forgetfulness, lost in the waves, my scorching soft lips will be recalled just as an airy flight of light brushing upon a newborn’s eyelids just at the moment of birth. A rustling more felt than heard, the ****** and bruised carrying body will sensate and instantly forget, but nonetheless transmit genetically, that the profane of birth and life renewing can be only washed away, when past and future, recalled and recreated, kisses from head to toes, dripping with softening saltwater tears, a chemical organic reagent of creation,
inside the histories of head to toe kissing
III the insane
so when, somewhere, some place, a man’s body prepares
tous ses adieux, his memory foolishly sane and strong,
his wasted paper bag container ship, rust bucketed,
crinkled and wrinkled, skin folding in on itself, hanging to bones
by stretched sinews and tendons that no longer tend to business,
loosened and gangly, they hang on barely to the bare nakedness of
evolutionary processes, mostly not, offset, by the tenderizing effects of kisses, from invisible attendees, unconscious they,
willingly and unwillingly, offering farewells in actuality...
head to toes, noses to belly buttons, tatted, tattered, and still tasted by dying cells. It’s insane to think it’s even possible one retains each and all, but he does, those few given, those few millions he gave away for cheap belly laughs and poems, decade upon decade accumulated are the totality of him, all of them free and sealed in kisses from head to toes
Jun 3, 2019
Jun 3, 2019 at 4:42 PM UTC
A million monarchs lie dead, though,
No less sociological programming of
Upper-middle to rich classes with
Decadence, affluence, inclusion, is.
No less societal determination of
Middle to lower, being excluded by
Division and conquering, privation.
Yet, they, on wing no more, still fly
In our spirit's eye, heal humanities' heart.
While their silent cry echoes
The 33,000 species extinct each year,
A rate not seen since the last ice age
Ensued; does it move you?
Does your curiosity ask why?
Will you, on this 33rd Earth Day, allow
A tear for all life's fallen? Consider
The losses economic apartheid incurs,
Mirrored by the divide humancentricity
Has levied? Our underlying duplicitous
Disregard for life, greed and oil fueled,
Won't abate for our existence, will you?
Dec 19, 2017
Dec 19, 2017 at 5:07 PM UTC
profane is the word you seek
when it comes to
looking up
this vicious word
called
love...
for how can one live
in deeper lies
than the imaginary
of permanent belonging?
for what is eternity
but a mortal's illusion,
and what is love,
but the sum of all of mankind's fears
and insecurities?
Oct 18, 2017
Oct 18, 2017 at 3:26 AM UTC
I'm confused by the caustic whispers
What I do, I do for love, they say
I'm profane.
Of course I'm atheistic,
I'm under the dome
of this upset city
with my badge and gun,
what do they expect,
my broken home?
I of all the answers,
answers, I have none.
I know their caustic whispers well
because I am one of
the inimical voices
spraying my name.
My name is in lights,
while I wanted this, I never asked
I never asked, but
now my brain is awake and I'm profane.
Jun 20, 2017
Jun 20, 2017 at 11:37 PM UTC
after Yona Wallach (1944-1985)
Let's have it!
I came for the show!
Strip the Torah
to its essence
where not one word can hide
caress it with your Yad
singing in a lovers voice
an ancient burlesque
and when it's done and dressed again
parade it dancing through the congregation
a fitting encore
to a fine performance
as we almost fall over each other
to touch it
slipping spiritual dollars into its belt
the temperatures rising
like a finished prayer
that even makes the Malachim sweat
in their heavenly heights.
Aug 29, 2016
Aug 29, 2016 at 5:55 PM UTC
It was quick, fleeting, and will always be remembered,
It filled this inner void I had, but left me dismembered,
It was a feeling I craved, The one I lusted after,
For what it’s worth it wasn’t the worst or some kind of ultra disaster,
It hasn’t hurt anyone, well I’m sure she wishes she could forget faster,
But I will never forget this page out of a dangerous chapter,
It has my favorite quote,
My favorite hope,
My favorite thought about getting lost and experiencing a desire to cope,
There won’t be days in february where she gets flowers,
There won’t be strollers, weird reunions or baby showers,
There won’t be scrapbooks, letters, or home made meals to devour,
There will be sleepless nights and well spent hours,
She may not want a relationship but she made me feel love when I needed it most,
I want to feel pressure from her fingertip but have to settle for thoughts of when they were close,
Was it a make up - make out it sure didn’t feel that way?
Was it a wake up call if so it didn’t work out that way,
I feel like it was the perfect decoration,
The way we locked into the perfect formation,
Cliche poems written about how it was salvation,
Are my summation or translation
Of working out the equation,
That being real... I was thirsty and needed ******* hydration,
But you love me,
Well that feels really nice.
I spent hours up late trying to figure out if you did,
Thought about the small stupid things I should change about the way I live,
6, 5,
This is where I should say I love you and I would never lie,
But rather, the us line would be about our *** drive,
The back of a van, folded down seats, Ed Sheeran playing through the night,
Funny how I always write about a memory,
It’s like I wait for the right day to listen to the words of this inner me,
Wait for the right time to reignite our synergy,
Moments with little action, a lot of adrenaline pumping into energy,
Promises to make sure we aren’t alone when we are elderly
Speaking in private, I want to talk to you really but it always becomes generally,
Except for those nights with sand and stars I remember so tenderly,
Flashes of what could never be,
But is that the truth. I don’t ******* think so.
I don’t think that is the case,
I think with a little faith the sixth could live to the eighth,
And the eighth could go on further into time and space,
Sure we would have less patience, less “nice” lies, less grace,
But I feel the embrace was a showcase for what could take place,
I don’t want breathing space let alone breathing room,
This isn’t a proposal, I’m not asking to be a groom,
This isn’t a disposal of throwing away what is now to doom,
But without being boastful, We would’ve been the perfect match and epic in the bedroom.
I have no idea what this piece is supposed to mean I just knew I needed to write it,
Kinda like I knew I should’ve kept my hands to myself but I didn’t fight it,
I think back to sand filled jackets and wondering if that was the night I should’ve quit,
But I never gave up even though now I understand that marked under ridiculous never-happenings is the fact we might kiss,
Friends,
It’s fine, Playing pretend,
Waiting for your mind and my heart to mend,
Like a accidental picture you didn’t mean to send,
Or a series to finish so you can finally place the bookend,
Or a lousy boyfriend, Hey I know a guy,
Who would wake up in the middle of the night head in the sky,
His “life story” slowly becoming a long lie,
Nearly sweating to death feeling choked by his bowtie,
At the tournaments where you seemed preoccupied,
There were those special moments where we locked eyes,
But honestly I don’t know how to feel anymore.
I don’t know what to say.
I don’t know what to write.
I don’t know what we are.
I need to hear your opinion, your thoughts formed into words,
I need to hear which one of my thoughts you thinks hold worth,
I need to hear your laugh and tell me which are stupid,
To quit acting like a love struck kid,
Tell me to grow up, shut up, relax,
Get out of being lost but how can I without the map?
Cliche as ****
Yeah,
It’s what happens when you spend all night writing trying to find the words to say to you only to delete them over and over again until you get to the point when you start writing so much and you just want to flood out all the emotions until you have nothing left so you can finally fall asleep only to have those dreams be fantasies and burn into night terrors full of hate and swearing and ….
Me without you.
Jun 7, 2016
Jun 7, 2016 at 6:00 AM UTC
reaching for you
is like reaching
for the back of my palm
with fingers
of the same hand...
i just can't
you are so close
close to my heart
yet so hard to reach
so frustratingly far...
your honey sweet words
never desist me
but you are distant away
still i wish you'd stay
the world separates us
you barely know me
but you know me
more than anyone i've told
though you know nothing
about me since
i've told you no more
but you know me so much more
this feeling is bitter
this feeling is...
our profane love
Nov 6, 2014
Nov 6, 2014 at 5:55 AM UTC
I am just so ******* tired
to finally be awake
© Matthew Harlovic
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 12:34 PM UTC
a writer writes,
to ameliorate the pain
be it holy or profane
be it balanced or insane
with affection or disdain
Every word written wipes away a tear
every line, refuge from fear
a sort of self medication
a self reparation
a hopeful initiation
from a hopeless situation
every couplet,
a bleeding wound healed
every stanza,
a memory sealed
a writer writes,
to begin again
to leave behind the pain
a release from a binding chain
and that familiar refrain
in vain..
and so the writer writes..
Again..
and Again..
Oct 4, 2014
Oct 4, 2014 at 7:40 PM UTC
i've been contemplating, contemplation
running rampant in imagination
my mind had been emaciated
now emancipation is long awaited
the plot's under development
some say it's not intelligent
but being rowdy has some gain
living life without restrain
searching, seeking, self-aware
within a secret love affair
so popular with the profane
human nature can't explain
trying to make lemonade
trapped inside a masquerade
confident inside the mind
leaving others far behind
letting loose the known restrictions
fighting, failing those addictions
lying in order to conceal
the truth is, I cannot feel
but there is still satisfaction
watching every reaction
are these actions of the insane?
life becomes a giant game
then the thoughts begin to fade
and the ideas that they have made
I start to contemplate again
the game's impossible to win
Aug 29, 2014
Aug 29, 2014 at 6:49 PM UTC