#going
meditations freeing balm
light breaking through the night
the opening of ancient doors.
May 11
May 11, 2026 at 7:30 AM UTC
failure sat beside me
more times than success ever did
it watched me quit
watched me doubt myself
watched me stare at people winning
while I was still figuring out how not to fall apart
and for a long time
I thought failure was the ending
but endings don’t usually teach this much
because every loss
left something behind
discipline
patience
hunger
proof that I survived another day I wanted to give up on
people only clap for the victory
they don’t see the nights
where you rebuild yourself quietly
with nobody watching
failure isn’t the opposite of success
it’s the road that leads to it
every scar on my confidence
became evidence
that I kept going anyway
so if you’re losing right now
good
that means you’re still in the fight
still learning
still becoming someone stronger than yesterday
and one day
the same thing that almost broke you
will become the reason you never stopped
— xx10m
May 7
May 7, 2026 at 2:18 PM UTC
pickleball plans upended
played out on a world stage
a first lady refuses to hold hands
in the name of romance
but comes to the rescue
as the old **** goes down steps
May 7
May 7, 2026 at 7:18 AM UTC
I'm exhausted
Going nowhere
Re-reading the same page
Not in place I thought I would be
By the time I was this age
I need to change course somehow
Break from past decisions I chose
I'm more comfortable in the chaos
Than unfamiliarity of repose
I lie awake in bed every night
Plan being better the next day
Going circles until I collapse
No one has shown me a different way
May 5
May 5, 2026 at 7:35 AM UTC
left field is good now and then
as is thinking out the box considering circles and spheres hold such a grand place in all creation.
Apr 20
Apr 20, 2026 at 10:01 AM UTC
'a friend in need is a friend indeed'-
if you can be bothered to extend a good deed
-that is
Apr 13
Apr 13, 2026 at 8:18 AM UTC
going nowhere by going everywhere
a small planet spinning around a star
perpetual motion in relative stillness
Mar 20
Mar 20, 2026 at 8:57 AM UTC
the brain can ache
complaining like a child
'give me my sugar'
or I will send you insane.
Mar 18
Mar 18, 2026 at 10:06 AM UTC
numbed by numbers
credit cards and wishes
numbed by numbers
just not adding up
wishes are wistful
-can cost the earth
Mar 6
Mar 6, 2026 at 6:43 AM UTC
You didn’t notice, did you?
You didn’t notice when you pretended to be asleep in the car just to have your mother carry you up to bed for the last time.
You didn’t notice when you ran to the door and yelled “daddy’s home!” after work and he picked you up and spun you around for the last time.
You didn’t notice when the rain washed away your chalk drawings off the sidewalk and you never went back out to colour hopscotch again.
You didn’t notice when you dried off after you danced in the rain and jumped in the puddles, you started caring about your hair and makeup getting ruined and you never went back out.
You didn’t notice that you hung up those plastic play phones and never opened one again, you had a real one now and it wasn’t a toy, but an addiction.
You didn’t notice that you put on your shoes after playing in the ball pit and you never took them off again.
You didn’t notice when you ate ice cream for the last time without counting calories in your head.
You didn’t notice when you had your last fight with your sister about who got the passenger seat before you started arguing over who got to drive the car.
You didn’t notice when you stopped believing in Santa Claus, as the magic of Christmas was replaced with material wishlists.
You didn’t notice when you stopped believing in the monster under your bed, as it started to come out in the reflection in the mirror.
You didn’t notice when you went to field day for the last time. When you got your last participation trophy.
When you kicked your brother's seat on a road trip for the last time.
When you had your last play date with your barbies.
When you had the last Disney movie night with your parents.
You didn’t notice that grandparents don’t last forever.
You didn’t notice that your childhood cat wasn’t eternal.
You didn’t notice that your parents were growing up, too.
You didn’t notice, did you?
You didn’t notice that you grew up.
But you notice it now, don’t you?
You notice it every time you look in the mirror.
And you were shocked because your reflection doesn’t look familiar.
You look older, you look tired.
You look like it's been centuries since you’ve let your imagination run wild.
You look like you don’t even remember what it's like to be a child.
And you notice it every time you look back at pictures.
And you notice that you are at the age that little you were always wishing for.
And you notice how you never thought you’d make it this far.
Adulthood was a fantasy, as the games you would play.
But here you are.
And you notice it now, don’t you?
Time goes by too fast.
Feb 27
Feb 27, 2026 at 3:14 PM UTC
****** downward
gravity wins
elasticity of skin
loosening
hangdog expressions
howling at the Moon
gravity never lets up
forever spiraling.
Feb 27
Feb 27, 2026 at 7:36 AM UTC
i go back
and back and back
always going back
one step forward
five steps back
almost a month is as clean as it gets
i guess
back
and back
tick
tock
like clockwork
Nov 17, 2025
Nov 17, 2025 at 7:29 PM UTC
Dissolving in Ecstasy
I take leave
facing Awareness alert
showing flowery way Homewards
diffuse rainbows riding fast
a whispering shoreline
blood becomes water
bones skin nails hair lips
Spirit sailing soars
I lived a full life of laughter
all praise to God’s Great Love
weep not for me
now or evermore !
~~~~~~~~~~~
Oct 9, 2025
Oct 9, 2025 at 1:54 PM UTC
Let the world end
That has never said hello to me.
I've finally begun
To realize I missed the beginning.
Late to the show.
Life was late to my birthday.
It's now 11:59,
And no angels show themselves.
These seconds burying
Me like dirt, like tar, I'm just waiting
For the last crumb
Of daylight to say, Adieu.
Sep 25, 2025
Sep 25, 2025 at 7:55 PM UTC
No matter what they say,
don’t stop.
It might be madness,
it might be painful,
but just keep swimming,
just keep swimming.
Aug 28, 2025
Aug 28, 2025 at 6:52 AM UTC
Talk to me about sadness
I want to tell you
But i ask you
To fill space
Fill me with you
For soon i will
Go, More words to suspend
Speak so i can swim
In the low light cavern of your mind
In the riptide of your tongue
Without hearing
Only seeing your shape shifting mouth
I am no longer leaving
I am staying
I am staying
Here
With you
As your tongue spins time like a bobbin
I rest
In the aimless needle
Knowing my spot on the quilt
There is a comfort in seeing my trace
My thread
Threads parallel to yours
In this moment
We are infinite
On this quilt
Entangled
Least i have something to remind me
Something to keep you close to me
I want to tell you
What?
scared of my own feelings
When i cant find their cowardly bodies
I let you keep talking
And you do, you keep us here, you keep me
close to the hearth in your heart
Until
Its done
Im walking away
And You're walking away
I don't look but i assume you are
Threads leaving the quilt just as they pierced it
Undone
through the blurry windshield of my pupils
Wind peeling the drops from my eyes
As i peddle away
Away from the end
Away from leaving
Away from death
Away from myself
Away from
You
Talk to me about sadness
So at least i'll know what to expect when i leave you
Will you do me that favor?
Aug 9, 2025
Aug 9, 2025 at 10:01 AM UTC
For anyone who needs to hear it
For anyone who cries at night
For anyone who who dries their tears
On saying "I'm alright"
For anyone who's in their head
And thinks they're not enough
Who worries about their body size
And ever finding love
The world is going to beat you down
To teach you to stand back up
But just because the world is cruel
It doesn't mean give up
You're so much more than your struggles
You're stronger than your grief
You're more beautiful than you'll ever know
So stand up... Use your feet
Walk right through that fire
Stand so you'll be seen
The world needs to see you glow
But just in case bring burn cream
Jun 29, 2025
Jun 29, 2025 at 12:00 AM UTC
I've come an awfully long way,
But of course I'm not done going.
Someday you'll prove yourself,
Never let them falter your way.
Mar 19, 2025
Mar 19, 2025 at 8:42 PM UTC
You won't get to where you're going,
if you don't actually go.
Jul 10, 2024
Jul 10, 2024 at 9:17 AM UTC
The first thought emerging in morning mind:
"World blind to suffering"
Is winding road going where I desire?
Question I'm reluctantly uttering
Dec 11, 2023
Dec 11, 2023 at 5:15 AM UTC
Whatever you do, remember you were, you will be, and you are
Great.
May 4, 2022
May 4, 2022 at 4:46 PM UTC
At times one has to go sideways before they can go forward
when attempting to reach that place they’re heading toward.
________________________
Jan 31, 2022
Jan 31, 2022 at 5:39 AM UTC