#exhausting
The world turns dark / I grow tired / the world continues to rotate / the grass grows long
alongside my hair / rain blesses the cracked earth / grocery stores fill up and empty rhythmically
/ the clock keeps ticking / people die / babies see the world for the first time / my existence
beside it all / with the beating of my heart / the swoosh of my skirts / the clatter of boots on
concrete / with the music in my headphones / the scratch of my pencil on paper / the world
grows weary / I grow weary alongside it / I am learning to breathe slowly / learning when to
step back from the noise / when to crawl into bed / when to go to church / when to reach out to a
friend / when to let a thought pass / when to embrace it gently / when to love / when to be in
community / when to be alone /
I am still here.
May 19
May 19, 2026 at 8:17 PM UTC
A burning candle,
Burning to show it's alive.
So many audiences to handle,
Surviving is a job, 9 to 5.
Like a lonely flower
Getting so much rain.
Staircase never going up, too much plain.
Like a tea cup with a broken bottom,
A faded, worn-out folder.
Ashes float like cotton,
Unsent letters getting dusted.
Shattered bulb, long time blasted.
Life, silent eyes never lie,
Mouth which gets dry.
Each morning is a loss of the meaning of the word “try.”
Justice always hidden,
Where moonlight fades into painful sobs.
Sunshine never lands,
Where the curtain is bland,
Forced closed with a trembling hand .
Like a pair of tired eyes,
Where sleep is a hum.
Music makes thoughts dizzy and numb,
No dream to escape.
Close your sobs with tape.
Like a wooden mirror,
Which has no beauty to show.
Without sunshine, no longer glow.
A burden… stone forever unlifted.
No beauty, a bland mind,
A seeker of a little kind.
Existing is exhausting,
Where pain meets the sky.
Language of pain anxious to fly.
Apr 3
Apr 3, 2026 at 11:46 AM UTC
flat space rest
days end
prone gymnastics
bed of nails
Apr 3
Apr 3, 2026 at 9:32 AM UTC
(our mutual horoscope)
We’re in Mercury retrograde
it’s a chance to reexamine your heart
expect some miscommunication
cause we’re outside of comfort zones
expect a flood of new emotions
situations can get out of control
you might lose some inhibition
so check your intuition
Mercury’s moving very slowly,
I advise you to do the same
see, mercury focuses on details
while pisces takes a more creative view
when you put the two together
the juxtaposing energy’s confusing
you can feel extreme nostalgia
which could swamp your boundaries
So seek the least amount of damage
let water be your sanctuary
question other people’s stressful projections
take a beat from irritations
and be careful around your exes
connect with people who have your back
protect the things you want to foster
cause this going to be exhausting
.
.
A song for this:
Bloom Baby Bloom by Wolf Alice [E]
The Whole of the Moon by The Waterboys
Mar 11
Mar 11, 2026 at 1:37 PM UTC
Lately my life feels like
A road leading nowhere
And that's exhausting...
May 29, 2025
May 29, 2025 at 2:09 PM UTC
Every day, the fatigue that plagues my body gets closer to my brain. And, I can't help but wonder. When it gets there, will everything I've worked for be in vain? No! I can't think like that. Not when I'm so close to my dreams. But how can you fight exhaustion when everything exhausts you?
Aug 17, 2022
Aug 17, 2022 at 8:37 PM UTC
This story that began with hope I hope will end with hope
Feels hopeless
I gave up looking for answers, now I hope to find a way to cope
Denied access
The last ounce of hope left left when I decided to revisit dope
Again, I retrogress
This cat and mouse between hope and despair is an exhausting trope
I'm breathless
Dark thoughts fill the space left by hope, time to hide the rope
Chased by darkness
I don't even know exactly what sparked this
But I'm sure to end up heartless regardless
That's just me being honest
©2024
May 24, 2024
May 24, 2024 at 1:11 PM UTC
I know that what I've done so far
Has really helped people.
But sometimes, I wish I didn't care so much. Sometimes, I would give anything to be numb. Because it's so exhausting being a castle of glass. I can't sleep. I can't breathe. Because every day, I feel myself getting one step closer to the catalyst. The thing that makes me ready to take everything I've built and burn it down. Because in the end, does any of it really matter?
Sep 20, 2021
Sep 20, 2021 at 7:58 PM UTC
What is the deal with boundaries
When it comes to the things we love,
Why is it inexhaustible and all-consuming-
how do we make it stop?
Aug 29, 2021
Aug 29, 2021 at 2:39 AM UTC
Almost out of energy.
Almost out of time.
Almost out of patience.
Almost out of rhymes.
Almost out of love.
Almost out of space.
Almost ready to give up
and leave this wretched place.
But every time I feel I'm ready to say goodbye,
I think about all the people
I'd have to leave behind.
I think about all the memories
that would be erased.
Some good. Others bad.
I think about all the adventures
I'd never get to have.
Life can be exhausting. Painful.
So I can understand why you'd want it to end.
But take it from me.
You never know what you'll miss.
You never know who will miss you.
And you never know
What's just around the river bend.
Jun 28, 2021
Jun 28, 2021 at 9:45 PM UTC
And just like before,
I accept and take the crumbs,
Out of a love that I should be getting all.
May 3, 2021
May 3, 2021 at 12:15 AM UTC
Holidays are usually exciting.
But for people who are depressed,
Holidays can be exhausting. Excruciating.
They can be so stressed
Trying to wear a happy face,
They might have a hard time
Eating anything on their plate.
So, if you feel this way,
I have a challenge for you.
It's called operation happier holidays.
Instead of protecting them,
Tell your loved ones if you're not okay.
They may be upset, confused, or even angry at first.
But almost everyone secretly wishes
For their loved ones to be happy and healthy. So do it for them.
But do it for yourself too.
Because you deserve to be happy.
Dec 19, 2020
Dec 19, 2020 at 6:48 PM UTC
either come closer or stay away
having you in between is very exhausting
Jul 7, 2020
Jul 7, 2020 at 3:50 AM UTC
I miss the way you look at me
When I’m doing nothing but breathing
The way your lips find mine
Under every single red light
The way it takes hours just to say goodnight
When I was too nervous to hold you like I wanted to
Because I was afraid of what it might make me want to do
And I could write about how I’m terrified, because I am
But all I can think about is how happy I feel when you’re holding my hand
How you told me you’d be mine as long as I wanted you
Like you see a day coming when my “I love you” won’t be true
But right now there’s nothing I want more than to kiss you like I’m meant to
To trace your lips with my fingertips, just admiring the view
I want to lay with my head on your chest
Your hands moving over my skin like no one else is in the room
I remember your hair, how it gets red in the summer
And what it looks like dripping wet just out of the shower
You mean a lot to me I hope you know
And I didn’t know what to do with how sad I felt driving home
Knowing you won’t be there and I still won’t see you for a month
Knowing you’re asleep, 953 miles from me
Missing you is exhausting
Apr 6, 2020
Apr 6, 2020 at 3:58 PM UTC
Keeping my head high up in the clouds
Because it's too exhausting being just another face in a faceless crowd
Jan 11, 2020
Jan 11, 2020 at 7:52 PM UTC
Need to get out of bed
It's a chore
A fight in itself
But only
Cause you're scared
Don't worry
I'll help you out of bed
Each day
More taxing than the previous
I can't stand
The way it is either
But do we have many choices?
So just get up
Become entwined with my joy
Don't be scared
It'll be alright
Harsh times will soon get replaced
With days where
You want to get out of bed
Feb 23, 2020
Feb 23, 2020 at 1:42 PM UTC
Maybe I’m naive
Or maybe all the things I wish for can be achieved
The hate I have for you is shifty, I could never hate you completely
There are times when I get crazy but five minutes into it I get lazy
I don’t have the energy to keep the ******** up, you might see it as half empty but I see a half full cup.
In all honesty the drama makes me choke and at the end of the night I hope we can laugh it off like a joke.
Some would say I’m too forgiving yet unrelenting.
I have a soft heart but please don’t let me start.
I don’t like myself when I’m angry, there’s so much more love can free
Anger puts you in a cage, nothing drags you down more than rage
Love let’s you breathe, pushes you to be the best you can be.
When I look at you I see passed the mean charade, and see you for what you are.
The man I fell in love with, the sweet gentle lover. You haven’t been that man for so long now, he seems like a myth.
You have so much hateful **** to say, I wish I could just shut you up when I tell you it’ll be okay
Mar 13, 2019
Mar 13, 2019 at 4:52 AM UTC
I gave you all of my trust,
and what I got in return was a slap to the face.
You convinced me that you were fine taking things at my pace.
You convinced me to go back to your place.
Where my soft skin with your soft fingers you would trace.
You happily took me in your embrace.
And now I can’t seem to erase...
your face.
Sep 20, 2018
Sep 20, 2018 at 4:25 PM UTC
I try to find something but nothing's there.
I try to talk but my mouth's stitched.
I try to walk but I have no feet.
I try to crawl but I have no energy.
I try to move but I'm boneless meat.
I try to feel but I am machine.
And no one notices.
Or worse... No one cares.
Jun 2, 2018
Jun 2, 2018 at 11:25 PM UTC
I may tire of words,
but they will never tire of me
echoing in my head
they exhaust me
they release me
they hurt me
they heal me
Words are all I need.
Apr 4, 2018
Apr 4, 2018 at 6:46 PM UTC
The true virtue's chaos.
Chaos is a fascinating state,
Even better, as a state, chaos is everything.
A glimpse of hope that human solves the chaos,
but then it's gone...
You can't control and it feels exhausting.
Feeling of losing control, humanity tries to solve chaos,
Create an order.
Obviously not possible, it leaves a negative feeling.
Inner squeezing as if you got pulled by a strange hand into a
dark abyss.
It shackles ,your spirit, squashes everything out of your
pinches your bones till you hate it but then.
The only notion, admit. The only alternative, love the chaos.
Humanity tries to make and keep everything in boundaries.
These are fruits. These are vegetables.
Gas ***** up in the sky are stars.
They are students and the audult people
on the right side are teacher.
In the the end they are citizen,
human, animal, creature,
energy maybe an assemblage of molecules, atoms.
But when a new thing comes that does not fit in,
A new boundary will be created and more and more...
Humanity can't control that anymore, too many.
An apple is a fruit, honey is an artisan good, not for me...
The counteracts against chaos creates even greater chaos!
I love, but sometimes my darling makes people drive made,
Humanity is not ready to face the chaos in another way.
Chaos creates disorientation and orientation.
My inner me donned to a shackle, slowly squeezed, and
sag confusingly in nothing but everything.
A vessel made out of clay with a rough surface and a crumbling facade.
A powerful stream of happiness embraces every servant of chaos.
Jan 5, 2018
Jan 5, 2018 at 10:05 AM UTC
the most
absurdly
exhausting
of all labours
is the distasteful art
of pretending to be
someone
else
Dec 9, 2017
Dec 9, 2017 at 12:15 PM UTC