#deppression
when can I be happy
not the fake smile on my face
not the tight lipped I'm fine
not covering the scars on my shoulders
when can I be happy
truly happy
May 14
May 14, 2026 at 12:56 AM UTC
My bunny died today
yet I did not cry
I remember grampa's funeral
Except when I cried
They say I am "Strong"
I say I am broken
Because "Strong'
Is wrong
"Strong"
means I was born like this
I was not born
I was molded
I was sculpted
My bunny died today
I think I already died
Apr 26
Apr 26, 2026 at 7:11 AM UTC
Blood cracked lips
Nervous habits
One more drink
Burning my throat
Lost in limbo
Reliving my past
Feb 22
Feb 22, 2026 at 9:53 PM UTC
Dear Little Girl
Dear Little Girl
The girl who is tired all the time
You will grow up and become a great person
The ups and downs will go but your friendships will stay
Life will continue to be stressful but you will live your life to the fullest
Dear Little Girl,
Life will be eventful you will succeed.
You will be made fun of but don't let that stop you from enjoying your life.
The people will change and so will you
Your life is going to be like a roller coaster
Ups and downs will stay but you will change the way you see yourself
Dear Little Girl,
To the girl who is stuck in her head, you will learn to escape what your brain says.
To the girl who is struggling with body image, you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are
To the little girl who once looked to princesses and princes and said I want that type of love, you will get one, one day I promise you that.
Dear Little Girl
You will be okay
Jan 29
Jan 29, 2026 at 2:38 PM UTC
Why do I hate myself?
Is it the way my laugh bursts too loud,
Shaking the quiet around me,
Or my nose, too large, too certain,
Sitting at the center of my face
Like it owns the room?
I count every flaw as if they are prayers,
Whispered endlessly into the void,
Hoping someone, anyone,
Will tell me it’s enough.
But the mirror only echoes back
The same questions,
And I am left with my own voice,
Sharp and unrelenting:
Why do I hate myself?
Everything about me?
Nov 10, 2025
Nov 10, 2025 at 9:55 PM UTC
why do i always have to fall in love with the people who will never love me
May 17, 2025
May 17, 2025 at 11:20 PM UTC
I tear and rip at my lips, leaving them raw and bleeding
Looking bloodied and messy
No one wants to kiss a pair of lips that look like mine
I yank and tug at my nails, leaving them short and bleeding
Looking bloodied and messy
No one wants to hold a pair of hands that look like mine
I love and lose, a consistent cycle
My brains bounces back, my heart taking the fall, cracking a little more with each loss, leaving it broken and bleeding
Looking bloodied and messy
No one wants to love a heart that looks like mine
I pull and pick at all the seams throughout my body
I unravel myself and sew it back together again
I break and fix, a consistent cycle
But I take the toll, displayed by the scares throughout my body, leaving me broken and bleeding
Looking bloodied and messy
No one wants to love a person who looks like me
Oct 3, 2024
Oct 3, 2024 at 2:57 PM UTC
When I'm sad,
pain trickles down my chest,
from my heart,
to my sleeve
and paints it all red.
Mar 21, 2021
Mar 21, 2021 at 10:44 AM UTC
The classroom was filled with laughter and joy,
And dancing young teens
All i could feel though was jealousy and hatred
I hate them for being so happy when my world is so dark
I hate them for being able to socialize and make friends
I hate them for being gorgeous and tall and skinny
I hate them for everything that i'm not
It makes me mad knowing its not there wronging it's the universe
Feb 5, 2021
Feb 5, 2021 at 11:52 AM UTC
He was kind and sweet
He made the promises
That girls like me admired
I was naive and innocent
Was neglected from those in my life
Desperate for attention and praise
I believed and trusted him
Days went by and he changed
He started to manipulate me
Promises of fulfillness broken
Made me feel worthless
And like i had no worth
Soon i looked in the mirror
And only saw what he saw in me
I looked in the mirror and did not recognize
who i was anymore
Dec 15, 2020
Dec 15, 2020 at 11:20 PM UTC
Loving you was my self harm,
your words like a blade upon my skin,
making marks on my memories,
and tearing me apart by each cut.
So I became addicted to the high
but now with you gone,
I recreate the memories on my wrist-
but its not the same self-inflicted.
And I lied that day,
I said I did not love you,
but loving you was killing me
and losing you is my recovery.
Dec 12, 2020
Dec 12, 2020 at 1:44 PM UTC
When I'm down the sun never
seeks the sky.
Just a dullness
that hovers beyond the grasp
of my need to rise above
my pain...
I only needed that ray to hit upon my
sighs...
I need to not hurt like
before, I cant keep this smile aloft..
It's falling like a shooting star,
bruised when it hit the ground
never again found.
I'm dwindling like the stars caught
between the dawn and nightfall.
But never
a light flickering before its
radiance is just an echo like me..
You'll find me, that star that fell,
but never wished upon.
Just cold never seen,
here but missed,
as I fell from a moment of height
to a place where I'm low and alone.
Sep 25, 2020
Sep 25, 2020 at 7:46 PM UTC
I tell her:
My little girl,
These days are intense
And alone.
And I know when you
Open that gate,
You do not recognise your home.
My little girl,
I know your mind is dark,
I know there are traces of a plague
Infecting your heart,
I know you want a fresh new start-
But put down the knife
And let wounds mend
And pains blend,
And see this life
To its natural end.
Sep 7, 2020
Sep 7, 2020 at 6:27 PM UTC
Why am I like this?
It shouldn't be this way
Am I really alone
Or is it my brain just forcing me back
Back in time
To the dark
To this inescapable prison
Where have I gone
Where are you
Whoever you are
I can't do this myself
I just keep falling
No one realizes
I'm slowly failing life
The longer I go the more I fail
Slowly crumbling with every step
Failure is second nature now
It hurts but I can't get around it
I can't stop it now
I'm gone
Doomed to this world of darkness
Of failure
Will my brain ever let me go
Or do I need someone?
Jan 8, 2020
Jan 8, 2020 at 10:16 AM UTC
The sadly wind is blowing
With the silent sky
The clouds are coming
Rythem of rains are falling
I'm lonely
With alone....
With the bone....
.
.
.
My heart is breaking
So tired of crying
Lord...i'm calling
Lord...i'm calling
I need Your help.....
I need Your help....
Nov 13, 2019
Nov 13, 2019 at 4:11 AM UTC
Morning, day and night,
hopelessly I wonder,
Knowing nothing better?
Facing other fears?
I saw red and I saw silver.
when has blunt steel been useful?
like a wave of light,
there is nothing
there is silence.
then the guilt draws in, tiptoeing silently,
was it worth it?
what had I done?
there are no riddles no games
that was me
or was it me
Aug 12, 2019
Aug 12, 2019 at 5:21 PM UTC
Never let a pebble
Become a boulder.
For troubles should never
Accumulate to the point
Where you are lighter
Than the weight of your woes.
Jun 8, 2019
Jun 8, 2019 at 11:34 AM UTC
Will I feel this weight on my heart forevor?
Cause it eats me alive everyday.
I physically feel it pushing down on my heart and sinking it down to my stomach.
Will it ever be as light as feather?
Cause sometimes i get butterflies in my stomach.
I feel them flapping their wings and raising my heart back into place.
I feel so happy it brings a smirk to my face.
But it never quite gets there.
No matter how light it may feel,
the weight is always there.
Its everywhere.
Feb 17, 2019
Feb 17, 2019 at 6:22 PM UTC
I see it sometimes
in a dream at night
in a dream at day
I see how good it could be
could've
been.
its
happy
I'm not sure what happy is, but what else could it be?
I see it in my dreams
pure happiness, held tightly in my grasp.
it's so alluring
so
captivating
but why
when it's at its best
must I always
always
ruin it
end it in tears
not just destroy it
but make it a nightmare
i think to myself, why do I always have nightmares and not dreams?
but
is it so?
or
do I turn my dreams into nightmares
always
Nov 25, 2018
Nov 25, 2018 at 9:33 PM UTC
I met her eyes they showed a series of lies
what she hides is behind her smile
never to show never to see until only her can be set free
She is drowning but there is no water
People asked her how shes been
she said "I'm healing sins"
She carries the chains around her neck
Tangled and mess a reminder she is a wreck
The rivers are the agents of the sea
thoughts flow like the river sent into words
hard to express but easily felt
Her screams of silence never heard
what is dear to her its nothing no more
Only desire is to be set free
Oct 22, 2018
Oct 22, 2018 at 10:37 PM UTC
They ask me who I want to be
I ask them what is wrong with me?
They say to be like others are
You can't become a faulty star
There's no way that you'll get that far
Be a doctor, be a nurse
Be a dentist, drive a hearse
A poet? please, you can't do worse
You can't make money just with verse
They ask me how I sympathize
With tear-stained faces, bloodshot eyes
Those who struggle with goodbyes
And quiet ones who analyze
Or far too much, apologize
They ask me how I am so wise
I say that I just talk to them
Find the lovely, hidden gem
But first, I say, I don't condemn
You are you and I am me
That is all we have to be
If we strive to be much more
We fight our own internal war
Don't be something for another's sake
Learn to dream when you're awake
Remember you're your own snowflake
They ask me
What makes you happy?
I answer short of patience
And just a little snappy
I say that sometimes nothing can
Like leaping out of fire
Just to land in the pan
I feel just as permanent
As lines in the sand
Hurting on the inside
I just don't understand
And other times I feel fine
As if the sun remembered
How to shine
It's like depression just forgot
How to poison every thought
Or pull my fragile heartstrings taut
And shatter every dream I sought
But I don't say this all out loud
In front of one big jeering crowd
Or with friends or all alone
Or even when I'm safe at home
I look into their eyes and say
Don't worry, friend, I'll be okay
Aug 27, 2018
Aug 27, 2018 at 1:35 PM UTC
Afraid and Anxious of
Being something I'm not
Conscious about everything
Dying to be
Everything I want but wheres the
Fun in that.
Go out and
Have fun.
Its strange how I changed.
Jeers where the sound track of my life.
Knowing that many have been cheering
Lamenting of the days I should have fought.
Mountains where not made to
Nor overcome. That what I thought I have this
OBSESSION of
Painting my way by asking allot of Questions that I shouldn't have ask.
Race that I shouldn't have joined cause I'm
Sedentary. I'm afraid to move.
Timid and Nervous. Fear is
Ubiquitous for everyone, but its Victory over me is for sure. but
Wait its not the end because I'm the stranger of
Xenization, forever travelling alone
Yearning to be with somebody. This is the end and the start
Zero, yes I started with an A&Z is the end cause I always feel
WORTHLESS.
Apr 27, 2018
Apr 27, 2018 at 4:51 PM UTC