Matildapoem - Hello Poetry

Todays a day I wont remember, Tommorows probably the same. Memories burn, Remembering not what you want, But what you think you want. Sorting, categorising, In my mind. Who knows what has happened in my life? Who knows what's happened in todays tommorow? Yesterdays a day I dont remember; Full of fear and sin. Sin a word I always have destested. You believe in God. I never did. As a young child always questioning, What is this all about? Heaven and Hell are both the same. Invented by them, It gives them hope you see I guess I understand, But the word is just another I hate, I guess I understand.

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Aug 19, 2019

Aug 19, 2019 at 8:12 PM UTC

Matildapoem

Todays Sins

Todays a day I wont remember, Tommorows probably the same. Memories burn, Remembering not what you want, But what you think you want. Sorting, categorising, In my mind. Who knows what has happened in my life? Who knows what's happened in todays tommorow? Yesterdays a day I dont remember; Full of fear and sin. Sin a word I always have destested. You believe in God. I never did. As a young child always questioning, What is this all about? Heaven and Hell are both the same. Invented by them, It gives them hope you see I guess I understand, But the word is just another I hate, I guess I understand.

22

Morning, day and night, hopelessly I wonder, Knowing nothing better? Facing other fears? I saw red and I saw silver. when has blunt steel been useful? like a wave of light, there is nothing there is silence. then the guilt draws in, tiptoeing silently, was it worth it? what had I done? there are no riddles no games that was me or was it me

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Aug 12, 2019

Aug 12, 2019 at 5:21 PM UTC

Matildapoem

Morning, Day or Night

Morning, day and night, hopelessly I wonder, Knowing nothing better? Facing other fears? I saw red and I saw silver. when has blunt steel been useful? like a wave of light, there is nothing there is silence. then the guilt draws in, tiptoeing silently, was it worth it? what had I done? there are no riddles no games that was me or was it me

15

we held hands his hand in mine, mine in his we shared a hand we shared a thought we shared our scars it was two in the morning we talked until dawn skin that was textured and drawn as our hands touched we felt no pain cuts and burns strong and fresh deep and new covered our hands we wept that's all we could do

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Aug 8, 2019

Aug 8, 2019 at 5:56 PM UTC

Matildapoem

We Held

we held hands his hand in mine, mine in his we shared a hand we shared a thought we shared our scars it was two in the morning we talked until dawn skin that was textured and drawn as our hands touched we felt no pain cuts and burns strong and fresh deep and new covered our hands we wept that's all we could do

13

I am trapped, Not under lock and key Not in a room with just me. But in a place filled with persons I am muted, their laughter worsens I try to shout I try to cry But I have been solidified. I feel sick Nauseous from my own mind. My brain is the room I am trapped in My thoughts the kin.

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Feb 11, 2019

Feb 11, 2019 at 3:25 PM UTC

Matildapoem

Trapped

I am trapped, Not under lock and key Not in a room with just me. But in a place filled with persons I am muted, their laughter worsens I try to shout I try to cry But I have been solidified. I feel sick Nauseous from my own mind. My brain is the room I am trapped in My thoughts the kin.

11

If there was no fear; I’d be something If there was no suffering; I’d smile If there was no pain; I’d relax. There’s an if everyone wants, a smile everyone wants. There always will be, we know it won't help, we know it won't harm. We know it yet we want It; we want it more than anything in the world. It's not a material thing, It's something else. If someone understood, maybe I could.

0

Feb 11, 2019

Feb 11, 2019 at 3:23 PM UTC

Matildapoem

IF

If there was no fear; I’d be something If there was no suffering; I’d smile If there was no pain; I’d relax. There’s an if everyone wants, a smile everyone wants. There always will be, we know it won't help, we know it won't harm. We know it yet we want It; we want it more than anything in the world. It's not a material thing, It's something else. If someone understood, maybe I could.

8

Melting mechanically into nothingness, hiding behind my own imperfections. Fading inside, no one notices, no one notices. It's ok though I’ll be ok, I always make it through. Channelling pain to make my own pains disappear; looking down at my open palms wine red crescent moons passing across my vision. I look up; It's my secret. Closing my fist; exposing my broken nails. A way of coping? Or a way of avoiding? Having to scream having to cry. In my blurred vision, I look up, but there's no one nothing just white. There's no one, I need someone, there's no one. They say their there for me. They say their here. But when I say, they say I talk too much. When I don’t they ask what’s wrong. A continuous circle. Never ending? Or never beginning?

0

Feb 11, 2019

Feb 11, 2019 at 3:21 PM UTC

Matildapoem

Mechanically

Melting mechanically into nothingness, hiding behind my own imperfections. Fading inside, no one notices, no one notices. It's ok though I’ll be ok, I always make it through. Channelling pain to make my own pains disappear; looking down at my open palms wine red crescent moons passing across my vision. I look up; It's my secret. Closing my fist; exposing my broken nails. A way of coping? Or a way of avoiding? Having to scream having to cry. In my blurred vision, I look up, but there's no one nothing just white. There's no one, I need someone, there's no one. They say their there for me. They say their here. But when I say, they say I talk too much. When I don’t they ask what’s wrong. A continuous circle. Never ending? Or never beginning?

17