They say music is the path to the soul
Through it, you can see
You can see into the deepest corners of yourself
But why
When I see it
Do I want to die?
What can I not remember
What have I shut out
Why does it haunt me
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 3:49 PM UTC
I haven't been happy for a long time
4 years? 8 years? I've lost count
I'm scared that
when I do find it
if I find it
I won't recognise it
and then it'll carry on
forever
Dec 8, 2018
Dec 8, 2018 at 7:06 PM UTC
I see it sometimes
in a dream at night
in a dream at day
I see how good it could be
could've
been.
its
happy
I'm not sure what happy is, but what else could it be?
I see it in my dreams
pure happiness, held tightly in my grasp.
it's so alluring
so
captivating
but why
when it's at its best
must I always
always
ruin it
end it in tears
not just destroy it
but make it a nightmare
i think to myself, why do I always have nightmares and not dreams?
but
is it so?
or
do I turn my dreams into nightmares
always
Nov 25, 2018
Nov 25, 2018 at 9:33 PM UTC
sometimes I see it
the other side
sometimes its like I'm really there
one of them
but
why do I wake up from the dream
when this nightmare
has gone on
for so long
Nov 21, 2018
Nov 21, 2018 at 12:22 PM UTC
I'm cold
so cold
How long has this blizzard been?
I'm freezing
I can't feel anything anymore
Will I ever feel again?
Why am I so cold?
Why can't others see it?
or is it normal
If it's normal to feel this ice in my heart
Then I don't want it anymore
Nov 14, 2018
Nov 14, 2018 at 2:14 PM UTC
Tossing & turning towards the dying light
Tears on the pillow
Desperate calls were made
Empty words were shared
I tied a scarf around my neck
Pull it harder and let it go
Nov 9, 2018
Nov 9, 2018 at 1:03 PM UTC
At first, I thought being alone was bad
because
it's embarrassing.
But when I'm home
on my own,
there is something else.
Something else that I hate
about being alone.
And every time I'm on my own,
I recognize it.
Its been with me
for a long time.
Nov 8, 2018
Nov 8, 2018 at 3:58 PM UTC
You know those fake arguments you have in the shower?
Anxiety is like that.
Except it's all the time.
And you always lose the argument.
Nov 7, 2018
Nov 7, 2018 at 6:04 PM UTC
We all have a monster inside
some choose to wield it, keeping it on a tight leash
some keep it locked up, and throw out the key
some choose to embrace it
some are able to fight it
but some didn't win the fight
some are tormented by it
hunted buy it
but
nobody can outrun the monster
nobody can hide from it
It will always find you, no matter what you think you can do.
Nov 6, 2018
Nov 6, 2018 at 7:26 PM UTC
Here I am, at my computer
My desk is a mess
empty cans
empty bottles
empty pill cases
empty lighters
My life is like my desk
empty
a mess
and without any hope of being tidied up.
Nov 6, 2018
Nov 6, 2018 at 7:14 PM UTC