#deciet
i don't hear the whispers anymore
neither do I see the flashing lights.
my bed has become a graveyard,
where my blood is a fountain
and my chest opened
for the flies that drink brown liquor
and spit through rotten teeth
for the worms that deceive their own sisters
ending lives just for grinding teeth.
How have I come to hate myself?
Apr 1, 2025
Apr 1, 2025 at 3:39 AM UTC
When I was younger, it all seemed like play,
I bit my own tongue without knowing the way.
Tarnished my name, got caught in the mess,
Too busy chasing honey to notice the stress.
Chasing the sweet, I missed the bitter bite,
Blind to the venom hiding in plain sight.
In cold moments, I feel the regret,
The honey I chased, the venom I let.
Sep 5, 2024
Sep 5, 2024 at 11:21 AM UTC
Love has different meaning
To different reasoning
With factors and different reason
Love changes too; just like season
Climate change
Could cause damages
To love sacrilege
Love doesn't care
About your fame and wealth
Your pain and tear
Doesn't make love tear
Those that love for reason
Tends to be miserable
When the reason is no more reasonable
Such love ended up treasonable
I love you for
What you've got
And I love you more
For what you're not
Yea, that's true love
I love your style
Your everlasting smile
The way your beauty shine
Could you, please forever be mine
Well, that too
is true love dude
Though true love is scarce,
But saying "no love" is trash
So, I do insist
That true love, really exist
And so does lies and deceit
So, keep exploring
Till you find someone who adore thee
Sometimes you'd love
And won't be loved in return
Sometimes you'd feel loved
Only to find out you're not really loved
Don't give up
It takes some wrong
Some twist and turns
To get to the right point
At the end, you'd find love
Apr 24, 2020
Apr 24, 2020 at 3:58 PM UTC
Pretending to be blind
Is what I’m good at
Acting like I lack insight
Is what I’m better at
But loving you
Is my best act
Aye
Now tell me lies
Tell me I’m the only bae
I would see through the game you play
Make me your profile pics
Ohw! Do I bear the same name as him
Tell me those romantic words
Tell me that I rule your world
Tell me I’m the only one
Tell me! I’m listening ma’am
All those stories tell
Doesn’t ring a bell
Coz there’s no better heck
Than this hell I felt
You play along and fake it
To see if we would make it
And I was writing love songs
About how we’re more strong
Than the hardest metal
Not knowing I’m just a petal
See; I love you
More than life itself
The way I wish to please you
Is dismantling my mental health
Coz nothing hurts more
Than finding out that the one you does love
Is holding on to past
You know how it’d break one’s heart
When you think you’ve found your perfect match
And you discovered that you’re just a backup plan
Or probably in a competition to win her heart over your counterpart
You want to cast her out
But you know how worst you’d become
If she should be gone
And you know I can’t let you go
I am a nincompoop; it’s true
I am a mindless animal with you
I may not be able to give you wings to fly
But at most; I would try
Until my death; I will try
Even if it’s killing me
But maybe someday I will win
Jul 19, 2019
Jul 19, 2019 at 2:44 PM UTC
In the time of darkness,
The light remains.
Perhaps a flicker,
Almost in vain.
The hope it still gives,
The path it shows;
Even on the dawn of new eve,
Where the world nearly froze.
Neither can survive,
While the other dies.
The double-edged sword lives,
Thrives in deceit and lies;
But no one can stop
As the worlds collide.
May 9, 2019
May 9, 2019 at 8:03 PM UTC
The truth does not always come from those you want to hear.
It may come from a cop, struggling to do his job without bias
A doctor, giving pregnancy results to unhappy parents
A judge, putting away countless offenders each day
The hardest jobs in life wear heavy on the soul
How does one discern lies from honesty?
it seems the worst of news, the harshest of criticisms come not from friends, family, but those unknown to you.
Sure, not knowing someone can provide some relief
Allowing us to distance ourselves from who we are speaking to
Maybe it isn't personal at all, and the speaker is the one who is truly struggling
Life is an endless whirlpool of harm or be harmed.
An assembly line, passing one cold word to the next.
Where does it end?
What happens when the line stops?
When someone refuses the natural order and throws the system to the wayside.
Will the world simply cease to exist?
After all, I am telling you the world is still turning.
What if that was a lie?
Is kindness for the sake of kindness honesty?
Or is it just a "white lie" and we are never telling the truth at all..?
These are all questions I seek to answer, but may never find them.
Will you be the lucky one to unmask the truth?
May 2, 2019
May 2, 2019 at 11:48 AM UTC
And I believed him
Truths that held shadowy lies
Such a stupid girl
Dec 17, 2018
Dec 17, 2018 at 11:21 PM UTC
Trust?
How do you trust someone?
How do you take such heavy risk?
Putting your whole world on hold
Banking on someone's good intentions
And their conscience
Even when you know they are human
And we're inately decietful.
Just how?
Right now I'm afriad
Afraid that I'll loose
Loose it all
All that i invested
Invested in a human
Human like me?
This time, I'll chose to trust.
Or should I?
©2018 Busola S. kolade
Nov 28, 2018
Nov 28, 2018 at 7:09 AM UTC
Talk to God but he never listens
So I talk to man who keeps the truth hidden
Life’s true meaning now stings
Birth of infidelity from deceit
Death of loyalty from loss of identity
There’s pain in secrets
Aches in words if we listen
Depth from days of thinking
Could the soul be empty
Lingering and searching
She spoke of my pain
She said she witnessed it for years
My bruised heart that craved for love
The very same one that caught me off guard
Should there be a reason for an act
Or a season to react
What would have been left without the pills
A damaged soul with nothing left to feel
Oct 27, 2018
Oct 27, 2018 at 3:08 AM UTC
You were a cold hearted magician
Skilled in the art of trickery and deciet
It was so easy for you
To carve an illusion of your undying love and compassion
And it is so difficult for me
To still believe
That I was only a passing object of your fascination
The comfort and warmth that I absolutely believed
I could find in you
Was only a figment of my imagination
With your second trick
you made it painfully clear
That I was only one of the many stations
At which you paused
Took a breath
And then left
When your work was done
May 6, 2018
May 6, 2018 at 8:31 AM UTC
Peonies are pink,
your words were unloving,
Much like a rose,
you were deceptive and cunning.
Upon embracing your beauty,
my tender flesh was transfixed,
and as my ichor seeped out,
I began to go limp.
My precious petals wilted
and flit unto the ground.
Back to the earth, for your roots to redound.
All of my love and all of my spirit.
I will leave to you,
my darling.
My dearest. ~
Sep 3, 2017
Sep 3, 2017 at 2:58 PM UTC
I never loved you I loved the attention
To break your heart is my only intention
You smile you laugh you try to talk
But time is just getting closer for me to walk
You say nice things and such sweet lies
But your mouth is rotten and filled with flies
Your lips are soft and sweet
But filled with poisonous deceit
I'm you're Cinderella can't you see?
It's always been me
But your eyes only see pigs
Not the flower amongst the figs
You're peculiar
A new allure
You find your jaw impeccable
But your character: dependable
Your heart is your affliction
With it comes your eviction
You plead to Him to let you stay
You promise you won't walk away
A second chance
Another glance
You see your fathers hand
A marching band
A white beach sand
You gain a new stance
Mirror mirror on the wall
Who's the fairest of them all
The one who carries Him in his heart
Can lead a life with a fresh start
Jul 11, 2017
Jul 11, 2017 at 6:10 PM UTC
My memories deceive me, and my heart bleeds to thoughts of
you, poisoned from the curse that runs deep within my veins.
Do I halter and use the words that I can, to try with you,
another chance?
My memories deceive me, and my mind is headed to a paradox of
life that doesn't bring happiness but only a subtle feeling
of contentment. For in my memories you are with me in a
final, never ending dance.
My memories deceive me, as the bewildering cries from within
awaken the soul that has been bound by chains created from
the sins of my past life, and are made stronger by the sins
of which are my own.
My memories deceive me, as the rumors of your betrail fade
into the shadows but the calling from our hearts reach into
the light, violently, yet no sound have they shown.
My memories deceive me, trying to hold them back, all that
accomplishes is bringing you into my senses once again, but I
go forth to a different land with what could have and should
have been.
My memories deceive me, chased by an altered state of mind
where nothing has gone wrong, no death, no pain, just the
feeling of contentment once again.
My memories, they deceive me and everyone around me, for I do
not see faces, only souls that fade into surroundings. A
paralytic view is what they show, of what should have, could
have been you and me.
My memories deceive me, but could they instead be the truth
that I have been seeking as I try hard to sink them in
deeply...
My memories. My memories, immortal as they come, they open my
eyes, though they burn like facing the sun, in this time I
have begun, to realize my memories. They do not deceive, but
only conceive the past that I have forgotten and shields me
from...you.
Jan 10, 2017
Jan 10, 2017 at 11:14 AM UTC
What if it's took a different course.
Forget all the remorse, pretty lies.
Beauty in disguise, honestly..You don't see me.
Loyalty unfolding into anxiety.
Once these eyes saw beneath the surface.
As a purpose drench in worthless daze .
Running in mazes.. worsen by the condition in illusions of the beat of your heart ... question my ways.. things that portrays that amaze..Guess I should rephrase.
All those pretty words, whole world left unheard .
When it feels like your heart strikes up against your chest, morals to the test.. I know.it's for the best.
Impressions lost.. confessions toss, Colliding obsession.
Dec 24, 2016
Dec 24, 2016 at 9:45 AM UTC
He said that he wasn't good enough for me, and I think that's what set me over the top. Because all my life I have never been good enough for anyone: friends, parents, boys, anyone. And finally I had met someone who I thought didn't take me for granted. Someone who I believed loved me. I thought that he honestly believed he wasn't good enough, which in turn made him the perfect fit. But I was wrong. What he was really saying was that I didn't deserve what he was giving me. I didn't deserve being walked all over, the lies, the secrets. I think he was genuinely saying that I deserved better then what he was ever going to offer me. And after five months I still don't know what to do with that.
Apr 19, 2016
Apr 19, 2016 at 2:38 AM UTC
Maybe if we looked beneath the exterior , the radiant glow
All the pain hidden underneath would begin to show
What secrets she hides,no one Knows
But her grief, her depression continues to grow
A monster tears people apart
Hurting people merely for the art
A twisted tower of destruction
No preparation for your hearts abduction
In disguise do not undermine we
This terror, is this me?
Feb 28, 2016
Feb 28, 2016 at 8:35 PM UTC
After all that she had done to him.
He continued to love her.
Because, he believed that beneath all the vanity, lies and manipulation; She was beautiful.
Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 10:30 AM UTC
She sat cupping a mug
Of cold coffee
Counting the hours
Till he would come back.
She wished she could confront him
She knew of the *****
He kept visiting
And yearned to be more
Desirable and loving
Twisting her
Sterling Silver wedding
Ring
*if she could please him enough then he would stop going to that pimps house for love,*
When he came back; One AM
All ruffled and drunk
She plastered on a Hollywood grin
Whilst taking off his
Perfume scented coat.
*the coat that she had marked and claimed him in*
And as he took her that night
In her best Victoria's Secret
She tried her best to pleasure him
In every way she knew
As she loved him so strongly
surely she was enough for him;his one and only?
In her eyes he deserved the best
For he was her Jack and she his Rose
And thus she prepared herself
For more heartache
Seeing another date
made with her
On his mobile calendar
*No matter how hard she tried or how much she loved him she'd never be good enough for him,*
Jul 25, 2015
Jul 25, 2015 at 5:24 AM UTC
*Let me tell you something.
Something which may seem
Difficult to digest
Or counter-intuitive.
Your enemies are your best friends.
You must be wondering
What the hell?
But seriously your enemies are your best friends.
No one helps you more than your enemies.
They think of you better than anyone.
By being on lookout for
Your slips and weaknesses,
They always keep you focused-
Always at your toes.
They help your realize your true potential.
They bring out the best of you.
They never let you dawdle.
They never deceive you
Or blandish you.
They reveal your loyalties.
Above all
Nothing beats the pleasure of
Beating your enemies.
Don’t all these make them your best friends?*
Mar 28, 2015
Mar 28, 2015 at 3:39 AM UTC
a mirror never lies
the way you look at it in any way
you can never be wise
never could you look away and have different say
what you see ist waht may one get
but never lie the way you look at it
even happy it sees you sad
no matter how good it can show the worse of it
a mirror never lies
what it sees is not the reflection
but the deeper desperation
somthing worse that addiction
it cannot say what you are
but lets you see who you are
say whatever you say but it will show you the way
nomatter how you look at it its you it will show
a mirror never lies that is true
dreams are something you see
dont lie for it will show you the truth
don't argue and it give you answers
amirror never lies to you
for its you who is lying to it
what you see you might notlike
but thats the truth and it hard to fight
never fight what you see in the mirror
for it will just comeback to hunt you
a mirror never lie even if you try
for you are the one lying and not the mirror you face
face the truth no matter what you see
you may be ugly but happy
you may be filthy but clean
its not the reflection who is talking
but its the reflection showing
what you are of it knowing
Jan 10, 2015
Jan 10, 2015 at 12:06 AM UTC
I promised you no pain I'd cause,
Yet tears looked so attractive
on your face.
I swore your love was all I need.
You trusted me with your heart,
your mistake.
Your dresses tattered like your soul,
Being battered by surprise
in my eyes.
How sweet that you once loved me, child.
But betrayal, my true name,
Is sweeter.
Dec 9, 2014
Dec 9, 2014 at 10:34 PM UTC
You've said and I'd have to agree
I'm
selfish,
*Because
I refuse to let you do anything to me,*
Selfish ......
*Why because
I refuse to spread wide & let you
**** me then leave?
You've expressed to others
how*
Selfish
*I can be,
because
I wont give in to your deceit,
I refuse
to allow you any sympathy
when it comes to
your fuckery
your an
infectiousness diseases...*
Selfish
*cause I wont be
subdued with all
the lies and ways
you mistreat me,
all the game playing,
trying to scheme
fake me out,
while you try to
make me lay out
my cards,
ya stupid cheat,
Selfish
because I've told you*
I Wasn't Ready
*I'm calling your bluff,
Your not so tough,
Ya sort of funny papi
Your always trying to knock me,
wishing to cause havoc and bring me down again.*
Selfish
*huh
really?
I'm so*
Selfish
*because I'll put my children
all of them before you,
I've placed my walls back up
wont allow you to climb em
I've changed my mind
more than once it's cause
of something you've done...*
*You've got me rethinking
being up on this pedal-stool
&
I'd rather you stop shaking it
so
I can get down
but you'd rather see me fall.
It's*
Selfish
*of me- right
cause
I'd rather not have to fight,
I don't like being put down,
Specially ya
small jabs
about my mental
the many excuses
you've come to make
time and time again
You've dismissed
my past and all
the bad that's trapped me,
You make fun of me
for having PTSD
& D.I.D.
You've said and I'd have to agree
I'm*
Selfish
*cause I don't want to do this,
I don't need another man's
to abuse,
or for you to
use and beat me
I'd rather be*
selfish
*then to take care of another drunk
or man with any type of addiction,
even if you're addictions me.
I'll be*
selfish
*While
I guard all that's dear to me
You've already
deliberately
tried to cause me so much pain
dressed it up and called it love
but I wasn't fool to your game.*
Selfish
*huh?
Is it because,
I didn't let you in
well not as much
as you'd like me to,
Naw papi
it's because
You
can't just pop into my life
then try to take it over.*
**SORRY MOTHER ******
*You can't mistreatment
and abuse me
than bring me flowers
cards or candy,
You can't rock my body
then dismissively
treat me like
I'm worthless....
But it's me
whose so *******
Selfish.
*I've said it long ago
Oh how he thinks
I'm*
"His Type"
*Well that's not true
because
baby you've made it
so **** clear
that
I'm nothing.
Besides
a *****
a **** & a ****
A *****
even though
You've apologized
each and every time
those
words left your lips,
not right away
but you've done it
&
I refuse to forgive you
over and over
each time you've
repeated ya crimes...*
*No way could
I allow you back
because
you showed you'd
do it
again and again,
and if
BIG ******* IF,
if I allowed it
which I wont-
not anymore and never again
its because
you've said it
right
and
if you cant
remember
well baby
I'll help you
out
its
because
I'm*
SELFISH!
*Always Me Ayeshah ™ ®
K.A.C.L.N ©
All right reserved ®
Copyright 1977 - Present*
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 10:20 AM UTC
In darkness.
He was my light.
I was never enough because I was less,
To him I was never right.
But the worst was at night.
I would cry myself to sleep,
As he never cared about me.
Every tear matched the rhythm of my terrible weep.
You see,
Its called love,
Well at first that's what I felt,
At first its was just a shove,
But then he took out his belt.
Then it was a blur.
I don't remember anymore.
All I can smell is liqueur,
Whilst I lay here,
Sick to my core.
Sep 20, 2014
Sep 20, 2014 at 6:15 PM UTC