#ashamed
talk to the rivers about you
the trees listen to my worries
i feel most at peace with birds chirping
i mention you to the snowflakes
which lace my jacket
i feel so ashamed and distracted
come here and listen in
my heart beats increasing
come there and finish it
slash my body down again
i cannot keep clinging
suspended, wavering
i cannot contain it
expression, savouring
Jan 1
Jan 1, 2026 at 12:15 PM UTC
You call my name
with a tongue sharpened by hope,
your smile refusing to fade
leaving traces wherever you wander.
I collapse to my knees,
the weight of my shoulders
crushing the marrow of me,
yet you remain,
hands steady,
offering a tomorrow
I never dared to touch.
You hold a mirror to my soul,
banishing the shadows
that fasten themselves
to every doubt I carry.
You never ask for anything
but the fragile currency of my time.
How could your birth carve
such a fault line through me?
I am nothing but scars,
echoes of yesterday
repeated until they bleed.
How can I accept your smile,
when I see myself as waste,
a husk,
a ruin?
Yet still,
you gather my yesterdays
and pledge them back to me,
remade,
as though even broken things
can be worthy of light.
Sep 6, 2025
Sep 6, 2025 at 11:42 PM UTC
She laughs at my jokes
She holds my hand
She likes my presence
She talks to me
She smiles at me
She does all the things
That you used to do
She's a wonderful being
But I am a horrible person
Because I still wish it was you
Aug 6, 2025
Aug 6, 2025 at 10:09 AM UTC
I am ashamed to live today!
There’s too much malodorous mud!
I want to create, to win, to love!
But how’s it possible?
The evil’s crowned!
I look out the window and see the sky.
I go out the yard and hear the groan.
It’s up in the air, ashamedly, clumsy.
It understands that the final is known.
I am ashamed for this crippled truth.
The fact, that seemed like a nonsense yesterday,
Is now a reality where we have to be.
I don't want to live here!
Just noway!
Noway!
Apr 24, 2025
Apr 24, 2025 at 4:28 PM UTC
If it’s only a joke why does it sting?
If it’s only a joke why do you make it personal?
A joke shouldn’t be something used as a hateful thing.
Jokes are supposed to be something we can look back on and laugh at;
Not be ashamed because we were made insecure by a few words.
Make it make sense
Jokes are supposed to be lighthearted and something for a laugh.
Not to make people feel ashamed.
“Oh! Remember when you started-“
It’s not a joke.
We’re not laughing.
But you are.
It’s not a joke so stop saying it after an insult because it’s not a joke.
Apr 3, 2025
Apr 3, 2025 at 10:48 PM UTC
and what did i become in a moment—
not an entity i ever wanted to be.
and don’t you understand
i just don’t
have it in myself anymore
to mean nothing
to those that mean everything to me.
i became someone i hate
i wait outside, on your porch,
trying to trap light through my fingers.
i wish no one had to love,
had to tiptoe around themselves,
had to transform into what they never wanted.
i wish i never desired
to be meaningful to others.
the world would be much easier.
i don’t feel understood,
i just feel empty—
like everyone else is living but
i cannot
fit the oxygen mask
around my mouth in time.
in a cruel world,
i made myself the cruelest
and how do i reconcile with that?
what else can i give,
offer up until there is just a
shadow left?
i don’t know who to be anymore
and i just need to be guided,
hand in hand.
i’m young and the world
has left me lost
and i am nothing of
what i’ve always
wanted to be.
i am nothing;
i lose that feeling until it is
back on my porch,
trying to trap light through its fingers
and i always let it in.
Mar 20, 2025
Mar 20, 2025 at 9:35 PM UTC
Two weeks ago I met the most perfect boy.
I decided to shoot my shot,
and I made my ball in.
Im not ready to truly say I love him,
but I already know I do.
I know because his cologne lingers in my hair,
I know because I can ask him anything without feeling ashamed.
I know because I don't even feel jealous.
From the day that I saw him,
I knew we had a connection.
From the day that I saw him,
I knew something had begun.
Jan 28, 2025
Jan 28, 2025 at 12:39 AM UTC
Maybe my heart
was born too small
for the love
it carries...
That's why it
shares it
just to
give itself
breathing
space
Jan 13, 2025
Jan 13, 2025 at 4:10 AM UTC
don't blame me, it's not my fault.
you're afraid of the decisions you have to make.
you're obsessed with what isn't yours to take.
you're tired of the confidence you have to fake.
you're ashamed of the way that you break.
stand in your place, and don't blame.
Jul 24, 2021
Jul 24, 2021 at 4:19 AM UTC
I can still feel the way your arms wrapped around my waist as you hugged me in the kitchen looking down at me with the biggest smile on your face
But- I can also recall the feeling of how cold it was when you pulled them away so your friends wouldn't see us.
I wondered why you were ashamed of us
But- now I realize that you were just scared of being in love.
Aug 24, 2020
Aug 24, 2020 at 1:50 PM UTC
I won't have you howl,
"Gentle giant". They ask how,
I stand, your let down.
Jun 29, 2020
Jun 29, 2020 at 11:44 AM UTC
Ashamed as I was
For where I was born
Ashamed as I was
For where I belonged
Because everything here
Was just so dark
That the Ray of hope
Never meet our faces.
Ashamed as I was
For everything here
Because everything
Far off is meant to be gold.
Traditional is to be ashamed off.
Westernise is to be proud off
Because after all
Everything that glitters from outside
Has to contain a diamond inside
Jun 25, 2020
Jun 25, 2020 at 2:45 AM UTC
Don't look at your scars and be ashamed.
Look at them as a reminder that you are strong,
and that what you're going through will get better.
Don't be ashamed of your scars, as they do not define you;
things are sent to test us, to push us to our limits, but don't give up.
Just remember whatever you're feeling now will soon be gone.
Your worries will be lifted, and you'll be thankful that you got to see the sun rise another day.
Jun 9, 2020
Jun 9, 2020 at 2:48 PM UTC
I flew above the horizon
Soar high with the eagles
Flew up high to cross the great sea
With my magnificent wings
I joined the clouds on the skies
I flapped and flapped tirelessly
To reach the paradise
On which I can almost see.
The eagles gracefully flew over the mighty mountain
They reached the other side
They have entered their destination
A beautiful paradise.
It is my turn to ascend like them
I charged, pushed myself higher
But I lost my grace, I hit a tree
I fell down to the dirt
I tried to rise from the ground but I can't
Tried all my might but my wings are broken
I can no longer fly
I can no longer land on paradise.
Jun 2, 2020
Jun 2, 2020 at 11:24 AM UTC
I have been braver
Fool ashamed to be frightened
What shouldn't matter
Apr 11, 2020
Apr 11, 2020 at 2:02 AM UTC
When you feel like crying, but no tears come out.
That's nothing like what I'm feeling right now.
I've sobbed for longer than I thought I could,
And feel much worse than I thought I would.
I feel so broken and so ashamed,
I wish I could be whole again.
Mar 21, 2020
Mar 21, 2020 at 4:45 PM UTC
i want to tattoo daisies and desires
on the worn duvet of clouds
on a mellow autumn day
i might float home
with the bees and ladybugs
to stay dry and to build
art that will never be seen
Jan 10, 2020
Jan 10, 2020 at 6:54 PM UTC
These are wounds
piled on my desk.
They bleed for
attention and ink.
These are nameless,
kept away from view.
******* children,
of my quill.
Urchins in rags,
unkept and unfinished.
They haunt my dwelling,
as beggars do.
They are dismembered,
without proper structure.
Perhaps faceless,
void of identity.
Give them names,
would equate their freedom.
Label them,
and they shall see the sun.
Or not,
and leave them,
as they are.
Untitled.
Dec 13, 2019
Dec 13, 2019 at 8:50 AM UTC
Maybe there’s something between us.
A fire that we kindle but try to put out as if we are ashamed,
Blinded by the light.
But as that fire grows larger,
It becomes harder to control.
At some point,
We must accept the warmth that the flames bring us.
Nov 13, 2019
Nov 13, 2019 at 1:54 AM UTC