I joined the occult,
Paid some very hefty dues,
Then they kicked me out.

the god of small things let the lights be green and the hair look perfect and the clothes fit right.
the god of small things smiled at me in the grocery store parking lot and offered to take my cart back for me.
the god of small things left a daisy on my car today, so that I could think of you.
the god of small things said yes when the answer was no and told me to go instead of stay.
the god of small things did not carve mountains with rivers, but did let a stream move over rocks.
the god of small things let me fall asleep in your arms with a lullaby on my lips.
the god of small things said, “this is what we have, and this will be enough.”

Like a thief in the daylight,
I saw you coming,
And you still stole everything I had.

Is it love
If it doesn’t rattle your soul
Demand the world
Break your heart

Is it love
If all it does is whisper
“I will hold you together
While you’re falling apart”

I lost myself and I found myself.
I lost myself and I rebuilt myself.
And when I did not like what I had made, I rebuilt myself again.
I carved out, and uncovered, and restored, and outgrew.
And I, and I, and I.

And I still don’t have it perfect.
I’m still not who’d I’d like to be.
And my shadow still comes out more often than I’d like her to.

But I, and I, and I will continue to try.

You said to plant roots,
But instead I grew wings.
You called me a wild, untamable thing.

We crossed line after line,
Before you threw up a hand.
Betrayal hurts like a punch right after it lands.

You grew thorns on your edges,
Let fear consume like a flood.
I’m not surprised that you finally drew blood.

I won’t plant any roots,
Can’t stay on the ground.
Now that we’re lost, I finally feel found.

You kissed my lips,
As the sea kissed my toes,
I could drown in you both.