even with the full display of shine from sun
this town feels like english rain
i ate a cold sandwich today that was too much for yesterdays lunch
i am not sure where this is going
only knew that i had to get something down.
i've been feeling as though life is a ride,
and mine has become one that goes around in a circle
and never gets quite exciting.
the freedom after the break has now lost it's allure
and i am stuck in a habit that i just cant shake
i miss her, and when i say that,
i miss the feeling of thinking you've found something you've been looking for, i should stop looking
good things come to those who wait, great things come to those who fail
and the most wonderful things can happen when you've fallen flat on your face and you can get up and laugh about it.
i'm not sure if dreams come true, however life is no nightmare
find things you love and hold onto them, if following your heart is the worst thing you ever do i envy you

I'm glad you moved. I'm glad you're a child
I'm glad you're so crazy
and blind.

I'm glad you visit my friends and not yours
I'm glad to hear stories of your actions,
they make me laugh.

I'm glad you open your legs for anyone now,
I'm glad you barely let me in at all,
I' glad I made so many excuses for you,
I thought you were like me
I'm glad you're not.

I'm glad we don't work together,
I;m glad i never moved in, I'm glad we had so many good times
and I'm glad you threw them all away,
I really am.

I'm glad we didn't talk when you came to town,
I'm glad you hate this place,
I'm glad your parents are enabling, because you will never change,
you're a ******* and I'm glad I'll never see you ever ******* again you *****.

i never remember the words to songs i write
so i hope that doesn't happen this time,
you said some space and time might help,
but you reneged, you can't have me for the rest of your life.

Seeing your friends around town after you ran away to Syracuse inconveniences the whole **** night, no matter how hammered of tempted i may have been i went home with you each ******* time,
if you think that i was ******* around,
you are wrong,
and if you think i'm happy now,
you aren't far off.

i'm getting back to myself, though i'll probably rot in hell
i can feel a real smile across my face,
wake each day without any hate
i sure don't really miss you in any way
today.

i had my hopes up, i shouldn't go there
guess i'll just go home after these two beers,
so when did this start, two nights in a row,
i shouldn't check my messages, i'm ******* going home alone
i know its tuesday, i know its wednesday
how can i complain, wait i just want to get laid.

i know i blacked out the night i met you,
there was something that made me quite attracted to you
people keep saying you are such a crazy *****,
how much they want to see blood pour from your face,
i just want to see the way you move between the sheets,
and the face you'll make while you're taking all of me

this is a ghost town, if it wasn't i wouldn't feel so let down
just know you already blew it, by the time you hear these words it's too late
could have had a real fun fling, i just wish you learned the hard way

i haven't taken time to write this down,
you lived in my head for a while,
i tried all the things i could think of,
a ******* isn't what you are at all
but its what i have become.

on my own i can do the right thing
taking care of the love that raised me
that's where i belong, with father and mother, you'll probably never read this at all.
i have been away from them so long now, i am failing to exist
somehow i've turned inside out,
i am not who you wanted.

i'm a drunk and a liar, i'm afraid of the future,
i am not the man you deserve, this was not meant to be, no fairy tail or Disney, i'm failing to exist.

now its time for starting over, it's just the tip of the iceberg,
i hope you get what you wanted, it just better be what you need
you'll wear a white dress and a smile,
i'll be depressed by the sight, though later i'll smile
i've started to exist!

used to hate to be alone, i love to be alone
walking at night, check over my shoulder
i feel that weight off, no longer hold her
hoped to be in love, but you never really were ready
though i cant see how, no longer live with the burden.

i want to be at home.
i need to be at home,
you think i am cheating
yell at me while i work, cry the only times we've spoken
i should be alone, you go find the man you've needed,
i am not your one,
i am not your one.

i should be at home.
i need to be at home,
you can see this.
mother and my pop
my mother and my pop, could really use their son
let me be the man you loved
i trusted my heart, you trusted yours too
i am not for you, i'm sorry if you feel mistreated.
yes i was in love, i was just a boy you needed.

i hate to be in love, i need to be at home
still waiting for the one who can see it.

i used to sleep on my stomach when it was upset,
now i smoke these cigarettes to fill the void of a little boy destroyed,
you say we are friends though no response to text messages,
statuses of shut up, your words are all hogwash its true,
i don't love any woman by you,
though the search continues and i've tried other venues,
the only place i should be is your room.

i put my heart in an ice box because of you,
our love was once fresh as morning dew
and my heart has always been gold,
though it may seem freeze dried and stone,
i'm used to this feeling of alone,
your arms should've always been my home,
your words are all hogwash, and all of my heart left is blue.

i remember the day that i knew,
hey you began exercise, ***** you can't run from the truth.
Alabama slammers need slow vermouth,
through all of the drugs we've consumed,
and all of the stunts with your crew,
i can't feel for another there's no other woman but you.
Josh and i go hunting for cheek,
see a foxy lady and yell, 'juice'
can't help but think of brownies and knowing Kristen Stewart was doomed,
my heart it only beats for you, i know it sounds sad but its true.

to all of the hearts that i've harmed,
i never lied and said i was in love,
though thats what i wanted and i'm so, so sorry,
i can not forget her, brown eyes are all similar,
i should hide my poetry, words sometimes come to me,
without any sympathy yours cut right into me,
like that of a guillotine, intent for a head off of me,
i never thought harm to you, might of lost my temper for that i am sorry,
dried all of my tears on tees from salvation army,
hey you seem to blame just me, but did you watch the tapes on the TV screen?
im not sure but maybe that might be why i still love her,
no you're not ready to be a mother, we could have been family,
just leaning, waiting for you to come back to me,
god ******, lower cased, your crooked lower teeth,
i want my tongue inside of your cheeks,
but you'll never know until you read, all these things i've wrote since you left me,
this all sounds so self-centered, that was never me,
anything i did wrong was not make you happy
cause that's always what i want to see, maybe when i'm the man i am supposed to be,
cooking, tennis, teaching anarchy, your words are all hogwash,
my eyes are all that you need.