You thought it was just a phase
To you, it's meaningless
And something I choose for attention
But you can't understand
How it feels to feel this way
All of the time
You can't escape it and
It becomes very real
You're trapped in your mind,
Madness and sadness
Nothing can really help because
The brainwashing is only temporary
And you're back to your normal
Depressed self

I am not complaining
I am depressed.
I do not mean the garden variety
Typical misnomering
Ignorant word use.

I am actually depressed
Things have happened
That caused me to be depressed
Things happen
That make it worse.

But do not take my words
In the wrong manner
Because I know the difference
Between sad
and depressed.

I am depressed
There is no
Sugar coating to be had
I accept it
But it hurts.

Depression is when
you don't feel anything around you
even a single laugh

or a single touch
or a single smell
or a single taste
or a single feel

it seems like you're in another world
where innocence strikes back at you
That's when it's Depression
When you're at your worst

You don't care anymore about anything or anyone
all you think about is how ridiculous everything is and why do
I even want to be in this unfriendly world
I'm sorry to be so depressed
and out of control about everything

But you have to understand that's just the way I am
Don't worry, I'll get there
It just takes time, Be patient.
Thank You.

"you're depressed"
they say.
"you won't go to class
you won't eat
all you do
is sleep
you're depressed"
they say.
"i'm surrounded by failures"
he says.
dad, it's not my fault
i don't want to go
"i'll have to think about this all day"
he says.
me too
dad.
"i have psychological stuff wrong with me
from trying to deal
with all of this
the least you could do
is go to school"
he says.
i can feel the slam of the door
in my ears
"you're disrespecting me"
he says.
i told my bestfriend
that i'm not eating
not sleeping
or maybe sleeping too much
i told her
i blacked out
lost all sense
of hearing
seeing
feeling
fell down
"you're depressed"
they say.

Melancholy midnight drones
circuits short fuse
dawn for the sleepless
residual caffeine headaches corporate spoil
masochistic colonies marching on
titanic glass and steel infrastructures
devoid soul
wasted
is there time for tomorrow?

Because I’m never enough
for anybody,
which of course
isn’t true
But they tell me
that it is
and I trick myself
into believing them
I must be
the worst kind
of *******.