It burns in the back of your mind
And feels like you swallowed
A bag of stones
And now they're weighing down
On your insides.

Th meditation doesn't help,
Neither does the medication
The music feels empty
And the days seem darker.

Today seems bleak,
Tomorrow seems even bleaker.

I jaywalk,
Hoping a car will hit me.

I take one extra painkiller,
Hoping to overdose.

I shave my legs a little too hard,
Hoping to get cut.

I sit in the front seat,
Hoping to be the victim of a car crash.

I wish for city riots,
Hoping to get shot.

I try getting sick,
Hoping to end up in the hospital.

I use electrical appliances with wet hands,
Hoping to get electrocuted.

I pray for an earthquake,
Hoping to get caught under the rubble.

I want to get dumped,
Hoping to die of heartbreak.

I hope for all of this,
So when I say it was an accident,
I won't be lying.

And if you're in love then you're the lucky one,
Cause most of us are bitter over someone.
Setting fire to our insides for fun
To distract our hearts from ever missing them;
But I'm forever missing him...

I love her*
I love the way she makes me feel like my life is a slow motion movie.
Whenever I'm with her I feel like there should be a theme song in the background.
I love the way her smile makes me feel like everything is almost okay.
I love her.
I love the way her messy hair makes me feel like a child.
I love how she always knows the wrong thing to say.
I love her imperfections. I love every flaw she hates.
I know the way she talks, walks; I know the rhythm of the breaths she takes.
She makes me feel whole.
She takes out every impurity from my life and makes me a better person.
She might not know I love her,
Or she might just not care.
But her existence has given me something to live for,
She's larger than life.
She doesn't understand me.
She's a mess.
She's a beautiful person,
And I just want to save her.

They started off in love,
But if it seems too good to be true,
It probably is.

                     They continued fighting,
                     They said they only fought because they were in love,
                     Everyone knew they were breaking apart.

         They went on to falling out of love,
         They blamed each other,
         But they both were hurting.

    His heart was broken into pieces,
               Her heart was simply broken.

Always in the room across from me
I never thought this is the way it would be
You lying there so peacefully
Me wishing I could see you quickly.

Always in the room across from me
You were a brother to me
We fought and laughed and played and cared
Never a dull moment with you there.

But now I see the empty room
Where have you gone, leaving us with this emotional doom
So many people think of you
Praying everyday for you.

Every night before I sleep
I think of all the memories I keep
Saved deep in my heart
You truly were a work of art.

Nobody realizes how important someone's presence is
Till the physical body is nothing but nostalgic bliss
You will always be
In the room across from me.

If I showed you my body bare
Through the shock, would you even care
That I stripped down layer by layer
Just to show you my innermost scares.

First is the very top layer
The girl with the messy dyed brown hair
The smiles and the laughter
Hiding all the pain that comes out after.

Second is the life of the party
Loud laughs, happy and hearty
Nothing to worry her pretty little mind
An empty, intoxicated mind.

Third is the loving pet-o-phile
That wants to travel from Paris to the Nile
Passionate shopper, day dreamer
But when she's angry, never meaner.

Fourth is the girl not many know
Called horrible things like a ***** and ***
She does not care about what they say
Waits all year for the two months after May.

Fifth is the bottle of open pills
And all she wants to do to herself is ****
The trust in life no longer there
The girl with the messy dyed brown hair.