take heart.

be strong.

be still.


hold on to

that spark

they call hope


hold on

and

never.

let.

go.


familiarize your eyes

with freedom.


make your heart known

to all that is pleasing and pure


be strong and courageous.

it's not over yet.


take heart.


it's

not.

over.

yet.

Slippery,

Delicate,

Wanting.


These were the words that came out of your mouth.


Full of desire,

Hushed whispers,

Strange, yet

Familiar

Were your words.


Confused,

Comforted,

Naive.


That was me.


That was me.


Before I realized exactly who

Was planting those words so deceiving

Into my mind that was wandering far.


But then, you lost.

For He spoke Words into me, too.


Words that brought life.

Words that healed.

Words that promised.


Words

Unlike

Your words.


I scoff at you, coward.

At you and your poisoned, polished lies.

At you and your twisted symphonies.

At you and the empty oaths that once held me, fast.


I scoff at you.

words.


stringed up letters

carefully sewn

together.


powerful things.

they dance

on the tip of my tongue


words.


****

and

revive.


overflowing from

what's hidden

inside.


words.


build up

and tear

d

    o

        w

            n


sweet and stinging,

deadly and inviting.


words.


be careful, dear,

when forming these

on your lips.


watch out, dear,

for their unexpected

yet expected

effects.


choose them wisely, dear.


words.


choose them well, i say.

Have I lost
Myself?

Are these
Lies?
Or are they
Just
The ugly truth?

Have I lost myself?

These names
These labels
These choking
Judgments they have cast on me

They must be true.

Liar.
Idiot.
Thief.
Coward.
Traitor.
*****.

These names
Are my names.
My labels.
Me.

They define me.
They make me who I am.
These names.
They
Are
Me.

They tell me.
All day long
Without fail
That
I
Am

Worthless.
Friendless.
Hopeless.

Unloved.
Impure.

They tell me
That I cannot do
Anything.

That I’m worth nothing.
That everything is impossible
Because
Just because
I’m me.


They must be right.
These words
Ring in my ears
Constantly.

Each syllable
Beats in my head
Like a never
Ending
Drum.

I remember when
I was so alive.

I remember----

Wait.

No.

No.

No.

No.

I was made for so much more.

These names may have defined me.
These names may have hurt me.
These names may have brought me down.
These names may have crushed me.

But He will

Redefine

Me.

Allow me
To redefine
Me.

I am

Priceless.
Fearless.

I am

A new creation.
The new has come.
Those names will not define me.
They cannot
Define me.

I am

Chosen.
Loved.
Pure.

Made new
In an image so amazing
With a fire in my spirit ever blazing

None can compare.

Watch me
Spread my wings
And escape the clutches
Of the dominion of darkness

Watch me
Do things
You  thought
And told me I’d never be able to do

Watch me rise up again
Watch me transform
Watch me defeat the enemy
Watch me prove
Watch me prove.
You.
Wrong.

I have a new spirit.
A new heart.
Which was once stone,
Has melted into flesh.

For I will no longer
Conform to the pattern

My past cannot hold me
In its dark chambers anymore

For I will look ahead
Above the skyline
Beyond the horizon
And reach a place
That is unimaginable

I now lay down
The things
I thought
Defined me

And allow those things
To be
Thrown
As far as the east is from the west

Gone is condemnation.
Gone is the past.
Gone are the old wineskins.
Gone are those names.
The lies.
The words of the people
Who want to steal
****
And
Destroy
Me.

I know that
I’ve fallen short of the glory,
But

I have been remade.
I have been reborn.
I have been redeemed.

I have entered the Kingdom.

I have been

Redefined.

i wished upon a star,

and every night, i flew

to the second star to the right.


i spent my time,

looking for the house of the seven dwarves.

i painted with the colors of the wind,

and discovered the enchanted, glass-covered rose.


i went the distance,

lived in the hundred-acre wood,

and wore my glass slippers everyday.


i fought dragons,

found thingamabobs,

and lived a million happily ever afters.


the gown always snug,

the tiara always fit,

and i never forgot my gloves.


then, something dreadful happened.

i grew up,

and

reality hit me hard in the face.


the stars lost their shine,

and i lost my way

to the second star on the right.


the seven dwarves' house seemed even farther away now,

the wind lost its colors,

and the last petal fell.


the roads were blocked,

the dark wood showed its true colors,

and i lost the other pair

of my beautiful glass slippers.


the dragons defeated me,

the thingamabobs were lost to the sea.


i outgrew the gown,

the tiara lost its sparkle,

and my gloves were thrown into the trash.


and i found out,

that in real life,

there are no happily ever-afters.


but, i refuse to let this be so.

one day,

when all this is over,

i will find it.

my castle in the clouds.

and i'll be able to smile again,

and whisper,

"dreams do come true."

the ripe, red fruit he used to pick

from the tree in,

the garden he loved.



i remember.



his eyes.

still.

appearing lost

but

always watching me

from the distance.



i remember.



his smile.

no words.

just

the constant flashing of

a row of not-quite white teeth.

like unpolished pearls.

but pearls all the same.



i remember.



his old chess board.

and,

the way.

he

moved.

each.

piece.



i remember.



his hearty laugh,

when a joke was told,

or

when he just wanted

me to feel

loved.



i remember.



the way his body

looked.

before he turned into

ashes.



i remember.



when he was still breathing,

when he was still walking,

ever so slowly.



i remember.



the tears i shed,

my heart that bled,

when she told me he

had gone away,

never.

to.

come back.

again.



i remember.

in the shadow of your wings,

there i sing.

in the mighty palm of your hand,

there i dance.

under the gaze of your loving eyes,

there i stand.

in the comfort of your strong arms,

there i am relieved.

standing beside you,

forever holding your hand,

there i am.