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Apr 2020 · 126
I sold my last breath
Jessica Apr 2020
Ounces of it crawled out of my mouth
drawing in new life until the next climaxes out

I hold it,
a small pain dawns on me
as such a tiny thing
its quite scary

A machine beeps and brings me back to reality
to a muzzle linked to my life, my face, my reality

Inclined to fear what I cannot remember
I see only masked people five steps apart
contorted faces becoming their masks

Until the dream rippled to
only a murky beeping sound
which soon enough was drowned out too
leaving a quiet room of silent saviours.
Remember to stay safe and stay at home
Mar 2020 · 126
Hair of Blushing Dawn
Jessica Mar 2020
THIS HAS SOME SERIOUS SUBJECTS - suicide

Rushing through a forest,
of dashing bright colours escalating down from above,
glazing me in a warm hug.

My feet,
exposed and free from self control,
threaded through vines of ancient trees and trodden upon moss that glistened in the light that began to blush for the beginning of a sunset...or I thought it was the light.

Instead, a red line waved on a branch near the moss and with a ghostly glow,
it captivated me.

Its beauty taunted my feet,
so much so that I ran,
and in less than a second I stood taller than the branch, and evidently, the thin piece of red..hair?

I held it softly,
watching the small creature curiously, whipping around desperately against the cool breeze,
and I just got more and more curious.

I looked away, for a second scouting for another piece of delight, when I looked back the only delight I found was the sun light, reflecting of a ghostly grey line, in my pale hand.

I unfurled my fist,
and felt my heart sinking as I watched the slow sad descend of the old grey hair until I couldn't see it anymore,
and started to trod away, until that is, another ****** red hair started to blush.

However this time I,
Did not run
Did not walk fast
and Did not touch.

Instead I,
Swallowed my pride
Searched around
and Saw a long line of them on branches,
like soldiers ready to be inspected.

It was enchanting, the way the colour seemed to glow as I walked past each bunch of red hair that increased in size as I got closer to the end, ...  but at the end of the path is why I never admired the colour red again.

Strangled, dangling from a tree, red marks scraped so hard against her neck she bleeds and her hair...
her hair coming out in knots at her feet.

and i realised why her hair was so red...
it was covered in blood,
contorting to hide the grey oily twigs of  elders hair that was whisked away in the wind, to the blushing sunset I never want to see again.
I just wanted to write this, I want to help people with these problems and there people out there who laugh at this problem so it just annoyed me.
May 2019 · 168
Bare Branches
Jessica May 2019
The bare branches braced,
for the hurricane that came with the winter wind and rain

The tree shivered in the sharp outburst of wind
that cut playfully into its vulnerable twig like limbs
snapping their bony foundations,
reducing them to limply hang from a stringy piece of flesh.

The branches swayed treacherously now,
a few, battered strings acted like a lifeline,
yet the barrage of attacks made by the season never halted.

The tree quivered at the site of where its limbs might go,
pulled under by the pouncing waves and splinted by the dark jaggerdy rocks,
which would both giggle in a chorus so loud,
it drowned out even the winds howling sound.
Dec 2018 · 286
Bleeding Sanity
Jessica Dec 2018
The wound you left me,
cut deep within me,
no bandages of a new love will cure me,
but as I watch you leave my eyes,
Sanity crept out of my mind...
Dec 2018 · 127
The Last Letter
Jessica Dec 2018
eager...
excited...
bundling up inside me..
for a small token from a very special person
to come through that stretched box in the door to be ripped open.

1 day...
2 days...
3 and 4...
where has my butterflies gone,
my tummy empty of excitement which fuels.

finally,
metal clanks;
SNAP
and paper wades down the red oak door
to the ignorantly tranquil floor. and as it flutters down,
it resembles the last fleeting heartbeats of an old women
who I once called grandma.
Dec 2018 · 139
The magic of the land
Jessica Dec 2018
From the shivering trees of winter,
to sunlight's brew,
the world is magical to me and possibly, you.

You hear the birds song and the crickets noises,
creating a symphony of spells,
contrasted to the gunshots of humans who just echo until they ****.
May 2018 · 213
The Weeping Willow
Jessica May 2018
Weep,
poor willow drunken,
from the water you lay your roots on.

Weep,
for your drooping leaves ,
dance in the wind and upon the great expanse of the water underneath.

Weep, for the final time,
for my axe! brings down your drooping vines.
May 2018 · 195
The Method To a Poem
Jessica May 2018
Can I have some paper,
to be danced upon by my quill,
to pave a way for my thoughts to form and bind them to my soul
Apr 2018 · 363
The Silver Sun
Jessica Apr 2018
Fiery rays of white
awaken the dark soundless night.
  They trickle,
   They dance,
    They make the night seem blissful,
      and parade down in a line of melting silver,
        sending a shiver into the dark nights colour.
Apr 2018 · 144
Untitled
Jessica Apr 2018
from the moment we live
to the moment we die
we are apart of life
but when you end that time,
you get a choice
of running as beast, chained by humanity,
or be the earth that watches silently.
Mar 2018 · 238
Find a way
Jessica Mar 2018
Through the clouds of grey
a sky awaits.
And even though it can't penetrate the floor
the grey makes,
it will find a way for the sun to shine
Tomorrow or the next day
Feb 2018 · 186
The Compulsive Gambler
Jessica Feb 2018
Its an addiction.
Its a disease.
And once you get caught, your soul will never be free.

Some gamblers want money, others fun
but the worst kind of gambler is the compulsive one.

They play for pleasure, that come from risks,
even if its not just money they gamble in.
Feb 2018 · 122
The Crying Statue
Jessica Feb 2018
From where I stand,
on this concrete piece of land,
rain spills down,
like tears of man,
which flows in river of black liquor and whatever man decides to have.

But humans aren't the only ones who cry,
as this statue is also just sad,
watching death after centuries of its rise,
and wants to cower but is more stone than man alive.
Feb 2018 · 133
Desired Dreams
Jessica Feb 2018
Untamed,
Randomly chosen,
Dreams are not to be decided by your desires,
but are chosen by your unconscious mind,
so secret, but still very much alive.
Feb 2018 · 180
A Tomb for Lost Souls
Jessica Feb 2018
In hunger, they sleep,
waiting for someone, something.

And when it comes, they will hunt,
until they eat,
and more souls become lost,
in the paradise of loneliness.

Corpses become soulless,
and in turn,
are turned,
to become mummies,
guarding the lost until found,
by a lover or a sinner.
Feb 2018 · 217
Can I have a Pen
Feb 2018 · 217
Read Between The Lines!
Jessica Feb 2018
I don't know how people see,
What's on the surface
But not what's underneath.

How are you meant to know,
People as an individual.
There are secrets people hide,
So you have to
Read Between The Lines.
Feb 2018 · 214
The Executioners Blade
Jessica Feb 2018
The cold metal guides the sun,
To the eyes of the man,
Covered in black.

Cloaked in a haunting shadow,
He sharpens his blade,
And cleans his tool,
With a rag, so red,
It's ominous in his hand.

Cleaning his blade,
Silently keeping all the blood hidden,
Is his purpose as well as killing.

His last victom, wept and cried,
The screams still there,
In the deep red depths of his eyes.

Knowone can really clean a sinned blade,
And likewise,
The executioner cannot become a clean slate.
Jan 2018 · 280
The conscientious objectors
Jessica Jan 2018
Through our conscience,
we perceive, how life is meant to be.

Cowards,
they may have been called, through out the first world war,
but I believe, they were brave,
as they stood up with words,
not swords a blaze.

It is sad to say,
that they became a nuisance in society rule,
the white feather they endured.
Alienated from their place,
their neighbourhood,
their way.

The isolation was put in place,
to break them,
to propaganda their way.
Don't forget the brave, advertised as afraid, who save the world from obedience and pain.
Jan 2018 · 194
What poems we write.
Jessica Jan 2018
These poems we express,
through our minds that sometimes we suppress,
are delivered through these pages,
in deep, controversial verses.

These lines,
the imitation of life,
single highhandedly,
lets our minds,
saw free from the chains that bind,
to the open expanse of the sky.

I leave you with this message,
hopefully it will guide your passage,
to be free from the masses, that restrain your mind,
in a ball of yarn,
that a creature guards, to keep you inside.
Hope you like the new poem ;)
Dec 2017 · 184
Dieting
Jessica Dec 2017
I've never dieted before,
I thought I never would,
until, my boyfriend told me I should.
This may sound mean, but peoples opinions conceal everyone's mind,
even in their darkest time.

So go ahead, believe I am following someone else’s choice,
but that's how the world works,
cause everyone follows someone even when they don't realize,
that laws are the same as this,
they get made and you have to obey,
maybe one day people will have the guts,
to do what they want, but
believe me when that happens,
they aren't human any more, they are an individual.
Starting a new diet, so I thought about writing about it, and also what makes humans possible, a community to thrive on.
Dec 2017 · 194
A new day
Jessica Dec 2017
The curtains tear, open, because of my hands,
which manipulate its material to open for the mornings welcoming glance.
A shower of light, gushes in the dark, sleeping, bedroom,
which spreads like a wildfire, into the gloom.

The room, now new and bright,
has now been set alight, for a new day to arrive.
My eyes, have now adjusted to the blinding spell,
which the sun casts on our world.
My legs, had now moved,
to the door, on the other side of the room,
where my first step will begin, for this new day,
which like any other day is unique and beautiful.
I hate mornings, way to bright, like a fire wants to eat me alive. ;(
Dec 2017 · 186
Conscience in dreams
Jessica Dec 2017
Drifting,
oh so ever slowly through conscienceness.
Through the fires of my turmoil,
which roar in agony, to real.
To the calm breeze, of my sleep, which surrounds me, and conceals me.
From the ripples of water that act as memories,
which leads to the play in my dreams,
made and constructed by all these things,
that I have been over the years.

My dreams have been made by feelings I had,
like the fires I spoke of but more serene and sad.
Horrors of losing the people who are close,
are made true in my dreams,
where my monsters come close.
These dreams make me sad and cold inside,
even though I wake up, sweaty and alive.

I sleep again,
my calming beat, reminds me.
I'm in a field this time, the wind, unusually warm and welcoming,
its calm relaxes me as i conscientiously sleep.

My last dream,
before I have to re awake, to start my day,
is one of memory warm and sweet, as I eat and chew something chocolaty new.
A birthday I think, this memory is,
as the food, I scarf down my throat,
is something as great as a chocolate cake.
This memory I realized, has been lost in the junk of my mind,
and I hope one day,
I'll remember these memories,
outside of sleep and outside of my time.
Dreams are strange things, they use memories that you can't remember to construct such intricate dreams, sometimes lovely, sometimes ugly.
Dec 2017 · 194
The power to believe
Jessica Dec 2017
In the place the tree leaves dance,
their one shall find flames,
the fires shadow will illuminate the village,
and once again,
the trees leaves will bud anew.
From an anime, its an amazing poem about a village. I hope u enjoy
Dec 2017 · 193
The brightly lit room
Jessica Dec 2017
So bright yet so tight,
this room confines me.
Its candles flicker in the bright light that produces its surroundings,
that are so bright they pierce my eyes with stabbing agony.

A window, I just want,
filled with the darkness of the night,
and the only light that should shine into this room,
is the majestic light of the full moon.
I have had enough of light, even though we need it to see, people just can't see in the darkness, so they run away to where they can see. :(
Jessica Dec 2017
From hazel brown, to light jade green,
each color intrigues me.
I float around this afterlife, deciding on my eyes,
that will come to pass in my further life.

People float beside me,
each bored without question,
and just float up to the color of their random selection.

I wondered to myself,
"Is there a combination,
of these colors I must pick,
or is my choice not a mixture of things."

Then I see it, a curtain I think, hanging, from somewhere above me.
I walk through it, unnoticed, unstopped, and see colors of a different sort.
On these eyes, held a soul of different forms.

One had a glint of blue flowing through green like a trespasser in a sea.
Another had gold,
tainting its blue,
so it looked like a diamond ring had been carved into.
Another, quite intriguing,
was two souls intermingling.
One of the eyes was a beautiful shade of blue, which contrasted too,
the tainted green, that was the color of emerald, strong and serene.

This pair drew me in,
its difference, quite startling,
and although in my next life, I'll have two different colored eyes,
I'll enjoy the presence of them, with every glittering smile.
Dec 2017 · 292
My condition
Jessica Dec 2017
My condition, a simple scene,
discissed by reality.
A hidden background lurks beneath me,
as I smile complacently,
but even though I twist my face into something that maybe...
maybe they'll remember, even without my Ora.

Buut..I doubt because they always forget,
the girl who doesn't stay longer to say she's no longer their friend.
All because shes lost in this dream, can U name this dream.
a nightmare, or something smoother to release all the anger.
None, as I tell you, because she's not a sleep, but is in reality,
where dreams float as clouds, through peoples sound, until they are needed in its deep sleep where the girl cries and weeps.
Dec 2017 · 374
My clipped wings
Jessica Dec 2017
This is not about an angel,
as some might assume,
from fantasies in books once used.
But I dare say, angels could be in this story,
but metaphorically.

From the shells in the sea,
to small, buzzing bees,
each has a place to sleep,
either in the sea, or under the protection of a queen bee.
You could say, he and I,
were similar to these different rhymes.

Of course, I mean by that he is the shell,
small but significant in the raging waters of hell.

But me a bee, so different,
but with my queens permission,
I can lasso onto that shells rhythm.
I tell you this because I love him,
even if I'm "above him".
My family exclaims this thing, so casually,
trying to haul my "foolish" forbidden love back to hell,
the opposite of heaven.
This was not my best poem but I hope you enjoy it anyway.
Dec 2017 · 326
Revenge: Stage 2
Jessica Dec 2017
Drowned in my own tears,
for a few days, I think.
All that time, I cried and cried,
scared I'd never blink.

You would think,
devoting a life, to someone so hideous inside
would get that devotion burned,
but  instead of burning my own life away,
I stood and decided to be a tornado today.

Fires can burn brightly, I know,
like the guy who broke me so,
but tornadoes can rip the land,
and still reach the star struck galaxy of black.

So go on then,
my lost, loved X,
I'll be higher,
not a star, but a brilliant, bright lightning bolt sent from a much greater fire, that has more passion then the world,
could ever begin to acquire.
Episode 2 :)
Dec 2017 · 169
Revenge: stage 1
Jessica Dec 2017
That man shattered me,
as you would see from my personality.
                                  But
As this poem is not about love or any other sappy thing,
its about how I got dumped by someone,
I devoted something so precious as my entire being.

He dreamed big,
as everyone does,
but I knew he would make his reality,
one with everything.
All that time,
I worked for him,
shopped and made him,
but in that time,
I cared for him so,
he gave up on me ages ago.

Now a star,
Me, still a tree,
lost in the evergreen of words that hurt me.
First episode of an animé called skip beat. absolutely hilarious series :)
Jessica Dec 2017
One bullet.
Two bullet.
Three.
Each one stabbing at me.
My legs scarping against the floor as I walk,
my arms droop like a puppet that lost its strings,
but you know what,
this creature in human form,
that's come to my school,
trying to ****** children so small, who haven't lived at all.
Who punched me so hard, I flew backwards what felt like 20 feet,
and who laughed in my face, as I fell beneath.

But it does not matter,
even though it should,
as my body scraped against hard wood.
All my body raged with pain,
but I stood up anyway,
because all the sorrow and bullying I have endured,
its wrong to let this creature rule.

So I stand, my body wilted and crinkled, under the weight of my wounds that have been sprinkled.
I cannot give up, I will not.
I started the sombre walk,
hearing
Pop
Pop
Pop

And just as I reached his gainly figure,
I quivered,
the flicker of my soul, starting to waver in the face of danger.
But I ignored it,
because of the other more brighter flickers of new lives.
So instead of blowing my candle,
I looked right into the eyes of the devil.
I hope you enjoyed this strange poem about standing up for other people, even if you are in pain and your life will disintegrate. Inspiration from anime. ;)
Dec 2017 · 226
Last time I saw him
Jessica Dec 2017
I saw him at the theatre,
an act he gave,
consisting of a mouse at a mascaraed.

I saw him at the amusement park,
playing at the arcade,
I saw his smile grow as he won the game.

I knew that smile,
way back when,
he smiled at people he knew,
and those he didn't; he did the same too.

Lost in his smile, I always had,
a deep connection with that man,
but his eyes are where the real soul stands,
and without it he was bland.

Last time I saw him,
I never had a chance,
lost in his own eyes,
he waited for her to come.
Just something I thought of :/
Dec 2017 · 257
Where is my mistletoe
Jessica Dec 2017
Cold nights have no sunlight,
as its Christmas eve,
but each second it takes that you stop outsider  my door:

                                      I breath.
Because just like mistletoe, you made me love the,
without an action you made me; me.

I love the way you look tonight,
black hair so dark,
it silhouettes my Christmas lights.

And your rare green eyes, has a Christmas tree sparkle, dancing in the twilight of this Christmas eve night.
Your face ,
pickled plum pink,
with a scarf that steals your neck,
to a coat so big and perfect,
your way of running here, is so sweet and precious,
I think I'll kiss you under the mistletoe.
Never had a relationship like this yet, but still young and waiting for something
Dec 2017 · 283
Cry myself to sleep.
Jessica Dec 2017
The phone beeps after our call, that is laced with sadness, that we can never be together at all.
My feelings are shattered between his fingers,
he's playing a game between them.

So sweet, yet so bitter, with every partner comes a tear, that turns to licker in an instant quicker.

And my face is drowned with tears so driven down my face,
I swallow and taste the bitter-sweet taste.

In the end, he doesan't matter as I dream about a future with the greatest husband
Dec 2017 · 175
Why...what
Jessica Dec 2017
From flowers to weeds its just our view,
on how life would be living without me or you.
Searching for life's answers can cause even more,
so why do we try,
why do we bother,
to find out life,
as a whole.
Lol. Thought of this one day.
Dec 2017 · 491
I am a Otaku
Jessica Dec 2017
Otakus are shy yet so amazing,
try to find out what they are saying,
but be warned,
cause every word they say,
every sentence they phrase,
could be a trap into the world of animé.
Don't know what animé is go search and be encased in its magnificence.
                                                      ;)
Dec 2017 · 195
The Hideous Building:
Jessica Dec 2017
From this poem,
you will see,
ugliness cannot just be seen.
This is not about the buildings features, but its about the lives its weeped for.

When the night shuts it down,
and no humans are around,
demons like cockroaches, scurry around,
hoping for flesh that they can feast on.

From this night,
once a week,
lost in souls,
this hospital weeps.

Each patient it has lost,
caged in this horror show,
from children to adults to elderly even,
darkness creeps in, looking for weakness.

I now finish this weeping story,
with a flourish that you now know my horror knowledge.
Enjoy my spooky story.
Dec 2017 · 499
The shiver of trees:
Jessica Dec 2017
Through the whistling winds,
they target and flow,
like a river without a bank,
to contain their woe.

From the sound that shakes the trees,
and makes them shiver beside the sea,
from the wind that lifts them high,
from the ground to the sky. These leaves that are shaven off, by the forceful winds,
that contain a wrath.

The shiver of trees is a symphony,
of something so invisible,
  but something so unique.
Hope you like the new poems about trees in winter ;)
Dec 2017 · 450
Dust and Gold
Jessica Dec 2017
This may be a song,
but because of its contrast,
its in this poem to try to show its power.

Dust and Gold, two different things, one we price for a diamond ring.
The other, we step on each and every day, dumping ash from a litter tray.

Dust, so Gray and light with little significance in this life. Is ignored by living things, whether it used to be a vampire or some other thing.
It is carried by the wind, but not like a bird who has survival instincts.  Like a butterfly stuck in a web, can't do anything but be dragged until dead. Until one day, its potential is shown, it'll wait until its wings grow.

Gold, an ore so special, so significant and different from any other metal. People wear it and show it off, expensive as it is, only for people who have
                                                           IT.
It could be anything, from  money to talent, from operas and musicals comes the banquet. Actors get rich from all these plays and the banquet is the gold paradise that everyone praise.
Very different and yet so intriguing, please listen in as I tell you something:
Every step you take,
Every breath you make,
Every word you phrase,
Something so significant can be deflated by your touch.
Remember my words, as you run down the hall, because I have been made fun of, because of my tolerance to not care at all, of creature so small.
Dec 2017 · 225
Am I not normal
Jessica Dec 2017
I listen too my class mates screams,
hoping for their expertise; of how to enjoy child hood
in the normal way I should.

The teachers shout over their arouse,
hoping for some child to speak out.
All I do, is sit there and listen,
to all the rowdy kids and the teachers anxious rhythm.
Lost in my mind, I try to think :
when will I,
be able to see,
why the world is so annoying to me.

An introvert I am today,
I hope tomorrow will be another day.
I am not rowdy and have 2 friends, each of them is the best, but when I look at myself in the mirror, I hope one day I will be more driven.
Dec 2017 · 238
The sinful animal
Jessica Dec 2017
Its golden eyes start to sparkle,
like dandelions turned to diamonds,
a wild animal turned to a house loll
sleeping through winters toll.

Of breath it takes, loud and clear
slicing through the silent ear

Lightly tapping on the floor,
for more love for a long time more.

Silky fur caressed my skin,
sitting there hoping for gin or some other sin.
About my cats. Love them too much = had to write about them ;}
Dec 2017 · 235
Centuries of change
Jessica Dec 2017
Twist of fate let God create
the world as we know it,
but let the world be our portrait,
something interesting will happen,
I know it.
;) one short poem off the mind, another will arrive.

— The End —