I've never felt as safe as i do
when I'm talking to you

Sleeping off your depression is not an effective treatment
-
-
-
you will try it anyway

some days i get so sad you don't love me
that i can't even look at you
some days i ignore that you don't love me
and i can't look away

I need someone to touch me
I want hands on face
arms around my waist
a hand to hold
someone i love to love me back for once

You hover over the send button
and think about all the people who don't want you anymore
and how they're one of those people

When I'm sad about you
I talk to you
Because you're also one of the only things that makes me happy

I love being with him and spending time with him and smooching him and breathing the ******* same air as him and just. Everything.
He is so ******* good to me and I did absolutely nothing to deserve this man.
That's my soulmate right there.
We have always been connected and we're ******* time wizards.
And that means we have always loved eachother and will always love eachother.
Because, when time isn't real for you, you make the good parts of your life last forever.
I'm not scared at all, I'm just soaked in love.

Im feeling manic
and Im gonna be honest for a second
I dont know how to write poetry
I dont think Im any good at it
I dont know for sure why anyone likes the things that I smash onto this web page when Im feeling emotions that I can only comprehend through words like these
But when I get even one notification
When I am informed that just one person liked something that I wrote
It makes me feel seen. Known.
It makes everything I feel a little less heavy
Because maybe someone understood or cared or felt a little okay about themselves too
I dont know how to write poetry or think im good at it
But it means a lot to me to be able to put words on the internet and have people read and respond to the things I say
Thank you

I shut my eyes to my loneliness
pretending not to see how it hollows me
I shield my eyes from the embraces of others
as not to let them touch me so violently

We've only been touching and tasting eachother for a few months now
But
It feels like we've been loving one another for ages
Every minute feels like an hour when I'm in your arms
And I wouldn't have it any other way
But
It's the same when you're away
Days become months without you
I become a mess I don't recognize
Desperate for just a touch more of you
To help me through
These weeks that are years without you
But all the same
I wouldn't have it any other way

You always prepare for the hurt
Keeping it to yourself isn't difficult
But it's the constant upkeep
Of a cheery exterior
That is hard to maintain
When all you can think about
Is how much this is going to hurt
When it ends

I keep telling myself that I can't write poetry for you
But I've been writing poem upon poem
And calling them love letters
Locking them away
For safe keeping

There's something so intimate
Knowing that no one has seen
The sweet words that fall off my tongue
As I whisper these love letters onto page
Into life