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lemon Aug 2017
Im feeling manic
and Im gonna be honest for a second
I dont know how to write poetry
I dont think Im any good at it
I dont know for sure why anyone likes the things that I smash onto this web page when Im feeling emotions that I can only comprehend through words like these
But when I get even one notification
When I am informed that just one person liked something that I wrote
It makes me feel seen. Known.
It makes everything I feel a little less heavy
Because maybe someone understood or cared or felt a little okay about themselves too
I dont know how to write poetry or think im good at it
But it means a lot to me to be able to put words on the internet and have people read and respond to the things I say
Thank you
lemon Aug 2017
Why would i choose to stand
to fight
when im sure that the weight
that will not stop tugging at my sleeve
the weight of existing
would feel so much better
if i let it drag me to the ground
and pull me beneath the earth
let me be heavy
let me give up
let me end
lemon Jun 2017
Chain Smoking
Heavily and Deeply
Until You Dissociate
And Forget Why
You Were Stressed
In The First Place
lemon Jun 2017
You can plan a suicide
down to the seconds
I have
But in the end
I'll probably end up
Stabbing myself with a kitchen knife
and calling it a day,
a life
lemon Jun 2017
***
It's getting harder
to be alive
.
Maybe I should go
lemon Feb 2017
I don't know
If my words will be strong enough
to describe how much
I want you
lemon Feb 2017
I am throwing up
and i do not know
if its because
i am sick or
because you made me this way
jealousy retches from my body
but
my diseased mind
will not leave me
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