I don’t know, I just feel so sad so suddenly. I miss the way I’d be able to count on you for loving me. For being the only person in the entire world who would drop what they were doing and come be with me, even if that meant lying to your parents and my parents. I believed in a future with you, and I could reach out and feel it at any given moment. Life with you was so tangible, so beautiful, the very idea of it embraced me as you had so many times before, holding me closer and closer to you until we’d mend into one person. I love you so ******* much, but it’s not enough. It will never be enough, because I can’t bring myself to give it all away. But I hope you feel it when I fall too close. I hope you feel it as my car drives down your street, exactly where it shouldn’t be. I hope that when you walk through the sea of fallen leaves at the park, you are drawn to the picnic table where we always sat at. And I hope that when you sit down, you’ll see it, my message to you, engraved in the wood with everything of mine.