I think what scares me about love the most is falling.
The moment of looking deep into his eyes as we both accept each others grin of approval. He'll then take me by the hand and begin to walk with me in complete silence, which will only hand me off to the next one.
Falling.
The moment he tells me I'm everything that he's been looking for because he's never reeled someone in. But I caught on and I thought that the bait would last forever, but it would never be enough for me, which would only hand me off to the next one.
Falling.
The moment I know I want to be serious with him and I forcibly try to make things work. Thinking that if we both dictate each others lives that we could finally live happily ever after. But, the end. This would only hand me off to the next one.
Falling.
The moment we tell each other we're perfect for each other and we want to be together forever. Because we're soulmates. But, you took my soul and we both overstayed our time together. Though the sweetest love, a bitter end. Which would only hand me off to the next one.
Falling.
This shall be continued when I fall again.

I hate to say this, but I'm sorry for leaving you behind.
You say it's easy to love someone through the good, but when challenged, the bad will show you if you'll stay.
And I didn't stay. I knew I had to leave.
I hate to say this, but I'm better without you.
They say not to jump from the boiling *** into the frying pan, but I didn't listen and I leaped in headfirst.
I found someone new. He's the best that's ever happened.
I hate to say this, but I'm moving forward with my life.
I say that when given a new chapter, write it as wild, and with the experience of loving you, I can give him something new.
I am giving him something new. It's time to bury our love, let it go. Let it grow and if it needs tending to, maybe I'll come back in the future when things are better. When things are right.
I'll take a shovel and dig at our dirt to find what was once our treasure of gold.
But for now, let it sink. Let it soak. Move on. Like I did.

You tell me I'm beautiful and I don't believe it. The last person that told that to me made me believe that for once I was worth something; that I was someone's sweet rose with thorns disappearing. It was a mistake to let my guard down and think how beautiful I could be when every word was a lie and in the end, I was bitter and created into a **** wanting to be pulled out of this wretched grown and tossed into a bin full of lost words and other weeds like me.  

But when you told me, I believed it because I thought you would never lie; you were kind and innocent and I believed everything you said. I grew the confidence of an angel and the glow of the sun. The next thing I knew, my halo was broken and my star faded into nothingness.

You told me they were prettier with their curves as smooth as froth on the beach and their skin as radiant as the northern lights. I'll admit too I was mesmerized, but I started to treat myself like a deserted island that no one wanted to set sail to. I did so much for you and the others didn't.

Will their beauty let you rest easy in their hardworking hands and calm you like the distressed cyclops inside you? Would their lips move mountains or their wings carry you higher than you wanted to be? The answer is no.

Their beautiful is different than mine. See, I am capable of saving you from being lonely and the heal you from the brokenness that was of your childhood. I am eligible to keep secrets about your past and guide you to a mesmerizing destination, which is your future.

My beautiful is different; persuasive in seconds and luring like Afrodite. I know I am beautiful, but you will never truly speak of it.

And what scares me is that
you knew how to do everything
you were happy with the small things
and I don't know how to do anything
my mind wanders to dark places.

How am I supposed to teach myself
the things that you were supposed to?
I feel like I'm always writing until I
reach a cliff and have nothing to say.

Will you answer me?

The fog is carried away and no more mist and dew drops on the flowers, but showers on my face.
A year ago I had everything in life and I was saying goodbye to school and hello to funerals.
How could you be gone when you're face was alive in my mind and your voice still created the same cackle it does.
When I opened the casket I saw the only thing that was alive was your memory, and how much we loved you.
They rolled you away and burned you into beautiful, delicate ashes just as gentle as the fog
Boxed in and wasn't going to be let out until you gave me that sign. One last gift.
Instead of holding you like a gift I didn't want to let go, I needed to unwrap you and spill you out.
You are free and vast as the ocean now. You will always be in my mind.
Like when I got the phone call and dew drops turned into waterfalls and bird chirps turned into screams of anxiousness.
I couldn't hold back. I couldn't let you go.
Just like May showers, you were here and you're gone.
Now the grass is less green, the flowers yearn for you to come back, and I can't forget you. I just need you to come back.

I can't teach you to love again
that's something you learn on your own.
But one thing I can teach you about it is
that you see, feel, and face love.

It's in that phone call to mom; talking about anything and everything.
It's when a stranger opens the door for you or
you for them; it's that 2-second gap to
say thank you or you're welcome.

It's making sure not to call him or her because that's love for yourself;
knowing when enough is enough.
It's through that cold splash of water in the morning
and seeing your towel in the mirror wiping the ugly
of the night before off your face.

It's buying a new dress and twirling around in it; like a colored, swirl lollipop.
It's knowing you are good enough for yourself; the one and only being that's been with you from day one.

You. You are good enough for yourself
live life to all you can imagine
and believe. achieve. act
you are your one and only, wisdom holder