Dear God. i hope You’re listening, i need to get close. im steady running in the same position.
i can’t get close.
my fingers hurt because i’ve been trying to pen down a letter to her & me & You for me.
im trying to be good.

these past few days i’ve been trying to get my thoughts in unison. working on harmonizing my processes & prioritizing my priorities.

im going to be raw.
i wrote letters to her but every single time i think of sending them to her, i remember that i won’t get much weight with my actions. so i throw them away.

im steady running in the same position.
she’s been thugging lately, in a good way.

i won’t even try to make sense tonight, i’ll let words flow.
****** of the youthful mind, hold me.

play softly, the strings at the back of my mind. be attentive, this tune will catch you.
she’s stroking my medulla oblongata, painting vivid images of passion.
steady running in the same position.

ever looked at someone and feel a conversation going on between your souls? no verbal action, just distance & the space between the two of you.

im steady running from nymphos of the youthful mind.
Father, hope You’re listening. help me to not bend Your will.
i’ve been good. dry cleaned my suit, im ready to walk with You.
i need to get close. but i can’t get close to You.
but im steady running in the same position.

****** of the youthful mind, tell me what do you want me to do to help you, help me, help you. she’s been straight thugging.

ever been so close to a beautiful conversation yet words halt at the opening and you’re left stuck with regret? days later, you remake the scenario and polish on what you could’ve said.

i wrote a letter to her & me & you for me. but i threw it away. wouldn’t have made a significant change anyway.

****** of the youthful mind, i need to get close.
but im steady running in the same position.

she’s been thugging. hat low, sweatpants low, afro hair, smooth skin, smooth **** dancing under the moonlight.
scorpion eyes, deadly eyes. i need to get close.

****** of the youthful mind, my gangster, i need you to stroke my medulla and play a thousand songs at the back of my mind.

im not trying to make sense, i was just trying to let thoughts flow.
Dear Father, can i run away? i want to run away with her, to a place nobody knows. us.
but please help me not to bend Your will.
send me to a golden forest, to the Garden of Eden, so she & i can be Adam & Eve.
we will be good. before then, i need to get close.

******, sing. sing me to sleep, sing away my troubles. i will run away with you.

Father, hope You’re listening. i need to get close, help me not to bend Your will. but i can’t get close. to You.
open the gates for me, im outside.

i need to take control of me and pour out vibes so hard the universe capsizes. ****** of the youthful mind, run away with me.

i wrote a letter to her & i & you for me. but then i threw it away.
don’t even try and make sense of the words i wrote.
don’t ask me how im feeling, just keep your eye on the poetry.

TeddyBearTribe.

she put my heart in a jar.
wait here until i return, she said.
i waited two forevers for her to open it, my heart was suffocating.

i was drowning in her memories, her eyes danced like fireflies in the moonlight. timeless passion. she is my flower child.

flawless. my heart is in a cage, solitude sedates me. i recall memories we never had or maybe it was visions of a future we will have?

i sit down with a notepad and admire your movement. i pen down my studies, and try to understand your complexity. your face glows, your waist flows. like the beautiful Victoria Falls, African queen.

i digress, you still have my heart in a jar. open a few holes, my heart is suffocating.

hair like Rapunzel, fine spun gold, only love knows our connection. time is but a teardrop in our moments.

on my notepad, is stories of what i think you could be, yet my imagination is far from your real being.

your shadow is unique. i can see it dancing under the stars, it tells its own stories. faded, i am.

im loving, your heart. keep moving, beauty. i love you. stop arguing with your mind, you’re beautiful. every man knows.

o, to be young and feel love’s keen sting.

beauty.

je t’aime. belle âme, mon coeur appartient à vous.

don’t you worry child, don’t you worry child. God has a plan for you.

even though pieces of your life are scattered, shattered, don’t you worry child. the little dark corner in your room is your place of peace at night when arguments get loud and hearts break.

your big-eyed brown bear soothes your mind when no-one wants to listen to you. when tears run down your painful cheeks your brown bear listens to you.

every night your ears are hurt by words exchanged by your mother & father. your ears are pinched by emotions of hate.

don’t you worry child. child, don’t worry. God has a plan for you. never let your hope die down, child.

your eyes are sore from pain. actions a young child should never see. dark thoughts that leave you knee-deep in pain. you only hope for rain, because the rain calms your pain.

all that runs in your mind is fantasies of a happy family. all you ever wanted was a happy ending. all you ever wanted was to blend in. all you ever wanted was for the world to move with you.

don’t you worry child. don’t you worry child. God has a plan for you. love yourself.

that little notebook understands your very essence. it understands your mind, your words. every letter you write on a page is understood by your notebook.

agony drips heavily down your lips. torture & strain conceive the life you live.

you find comfort in words, you find comfort in letters, you find comfort in sentences. your escape from a life of discomfort.

don’t you worry child. God has a plan for you.

*God always has a plan for you. don’t you worry.
cultivate love

can you see Pride’s face?
can you see the pride in Pride’s face?
boastful & frivolous.
Pride’s intentions are not of good will.

Pride just destroyed a home.
Pride just stabbed a friend in the back.
Pride ended a life-long friendship.
Pride just ended a simple argument.

he is a disease. humans are afraid of him.

can you see the pride in pride’s face? can you see the bad he creates?
can you see all the lives he took?

Pride is a crook. he breaks into the windows of your spirit and steals all the gold. that gold is your happiness.

Pride is a weapon. anything in his way is destroyed. Pride doesn’t have emotions. Pride can make you insane.

but Pride has an enemy. Pride has a cure. Humility.

Humility is Pride’s balance.

Humility can heal wounds. he is spirited & can bring people together. Humility is a weapon, a weapon of peace.

he is a conqueror. Humility is Pride’s balance.

can you see Humility’s face?
can you feel Humility’s embrace?
when are we starting to be humble?
when are gon’ respect each other?
can you see the pride in Pride’s face?

Pride cares about no one but himself. Humility cares for everyone & himself.

Teddy Bear Tribe.

saw this on tumblr, had to share

I learned in school that war is what happens

when nations disagree, but the textbooks never told me

that war is also what happens when parents disagree,

and when children throw insults harder than they hit baseballs

and when I cannot force myself out of bed in the morning

because there is a voice in my head that tells me

I might win the battle, but I will not win the —

War is what happens when teachers call on students

who don’t have the answers and they are left

fighting their father once he sees their report card.

War is what happens when it rains so hard

blades of grass bend over defeated.

War is what happens over telephone wires when a son

tells his mother he is gay and her white flag

of surrender is the phone going dead.

I have seen war burst into being the moment girls think

they’re too old to hold hands and again some years later when

they’re too young to do more than that, but charge forwards regardless

only to end up with ***** exploding inside them like shrapnel.

I have seen war across some people’s wrists.

I have seen it in bones trying to revolt from the flesh.

I have seen it in eyes like double whiskey shots

that are drunk off self-hatred.

I was taught that war was loud. It was supposed to be

bombs and a dictator’s speech and the sound of an entire race

being crossed off one by one, like the days of a calendar.

And I can agree that this is war, but war can also be quiet.

War can be as quiet as a miscarriage.

Or the therapy sessions afterwards, which is quieter even.

It can be as silent as a gas leak.

They asked me in sixth grade what war meant to me

and I told them about the Holocaust, I told them about the Jews.

I didn’t tell them about the boy across the road from me

whose father used his forearms as ashtrays and whose eyes

were the American flag: star-spangled.

I didn’t tell them about women that have their bodies claimed

like new worlds, or men who punch walls and wear their bruised knuckles

like honor badges for all the tears they haven’t cried because

they were raised to be soldiers

and soldiers do not cry.

I didn’t mention any of these things because I was taught

that war was big. It was something that happened between countries

and it happened with armies and guns and nuclear weapons.

But if they asked me now—if they asked me now

what war meant to me, I would tell them that war is what happens

inside people, and I would show them this poem as my evidence.

you gave me much attention, i acted like i didn't see it. i didn't mean it.
i was mean.
at first when you threw the hints, my eyes aint believe it.
now that you're in another man's arms, my heart is over here not believing.

i tried to eye contact you and tell you that i dreamt you, but for some reason our cable connection was cut off.
i didn't act like that for no reason, i was just waiting for the right ti(me).

and hear me out, im going to get to you someday.
and i'll keep waiting as i always have, i'll grafitti poems on my soul until i touch your hands.

listen, at 2am when i converse with the wind, i usually tell him to tell you that i love you 'cause my lips can't.

i was just waiting for the right ti(me). and i'll keep waiting.
'cause you can do the right thing with the right person. at the wrong time. then everything gets twisted.

somebody say timing.

"there’s no easy way to say this, so i’ll just say it – i met someone. it was an accident, i wasn’t looking for it. it was a perfect storm, she said one thing, i said another. next thing i knew i wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.”

you’ve tried everything, but you wont give up.
your feelings are crushed hard by love.
love, don’t give up.

you gave enough, but every time you get slapped by disappointments hand.
you’re stuck between calling him a stranger or another girl’s man.

i was told never to mess with broken hearts.

your young heart is tired of late night fights and holding onto tight ropes just to survive. your young heart doesn’t feel alive. its weighed down by words of regret. and heavy tears that run down from your bed to the cold floor.

an ocean of hate surrounds you. dark clouds of emotion hold you. just hold on to my heart.

you’ve tried everything, and you still don’t feel loved. he left you with scars, and tears on your pillow.

i’ve tried everything, just to get back your happiness. you’ve tried everything for love, i’ve tried everything for love.

what won’t we do for love?

your eyes say a lot. your personality shows a lot. your words explain everything.

& you’re tired of morning notes.
and you already know, that you have to leave it all behind. its time to go.

you couldn’t stomach the thought of him with another. but he is with another.
thoughts of a coward come up when you think that he wasn’t man enough
to tell you he wants to break up.

i’ve always loved you.
here’s a little note:

remember the first time we met.
soulmates we called each other.
you were my forever.
i hope one day love decides to get us back together.
i was your forever. you were my forever.
i hope love remembers our times together.

we were suckers for love. what won’t we do for love?

do for love. you’ve tried everything, but you don’t give up.

**credit goes to Tupac. this was Shakur inspired.