If only our words came from our hearts and not our minds
Not twisted by our tongues
And lack of empathy
Then maybe our livelihood would matter
And feeling the sting of your cold sheets, again, alone in your bed
Would actually be comforting
Instead of a constant reminder of how hollow they left you

If only we could show each other how we actually felt
Whether it was mutual or not
Instead of making puppets out of one another
Pulling strings for self validation
Lifeless and cold

If only forever was real
And didn't have to start with once upon a time to have a happy ending
Wedding bands and the family dog are over seen and under appreciated
Values are long gone and family time now revolves around KFC and your laptop

If only we could become what we want to see in the world
Instead of constantly pushing buttons or sitting in silence
Love is no longer a feeling but an verb
Describing a trait that died with our grandparents
Now a task instead of a privilege

If only we could learn to see the bigger picture
And realize all those moments we  capture on our cameras won't mean anything
When we couldn't appreciate who we spent it with

Watching from the side lines, like always
Funny how everyone puts me here
I wonder if its the way I talk, or my lack of personal space

Fading into the background now
Silently seeping into the dark
You didn't even notice

Three words could change our lives for good
And ironically, they're not 'I love you'
Even though I meant that too

Always second, never first
Take me by the throat to see
That I cried your name and bled your sorrows
All without a purpose

Breaking down the walls
Putting faith in your scars and mine
Only to end up right back where I started

Typical girl with a typical dream
Can't seem to shake it, or grasp it if I wanted to
Tried to find a way inside your mind
Ended up in your bed instead

Stupid girl with a stupid dream
You said it like you meant it
I believed you, I really did
But heavens too good for me

If time can't heal us the whisky will
Stuck between being numb and learning how to feel
After all was said and done, you fed me to the dogs
Now every time I try with someone new I feel at a loss
Drifting without a cause
If I could only press pause
Or rewind to see where this **** went wrong
Tracing back my steps to where I found you
What's ****** is I dont even remember..
But I recall exactly when you left
The sunshine turned to rain and I've been drowning in it since
What's left?
Nothing with any substance
Empty bottles and getting high is my only constant
Life is
More than I recall last time I checked
Less pillow talk this time around, my heads a ******* wreck
With the inability to change
I shouldn't expect anything better
Been coasting on this road too long
Just following the weather
With guilt being the glue that hold these bones together
My favorite lie you told me was that you'd be here forever

Complicated, tedious
Needs more tending to than your garden
Passionate but with lesson
Always watching but never does the work
Sacrifice instilled in its veins
It bleeds with every lie
Felt by most but not understood by many
Our greatest time sake and for most, just a memory
We give ourselves to the wolves in hopes we find it
When in all reality
Its likely already in front of us