I wish
The oxygen I breathe
Was shared with you.
Every breath intermingling,
Like God simply intended for us.

I find you
In every little thing I do,
In every song I sing,
Every word I write.

If I was any weaker,
I think I'd run far away from you,
Not out of hatred,
But out of fear
Because you're so perfect,
And I'm so damaged.
I don't want to ruin you.

For the past year, I've been searching for an answer to this question.
That's what I always do; search.
I don't really do a lot of finding.
Last year, I left you behind, But I think you took me with you.

I search for summer,
For early July and cicadas,
Happiness and the cure to boredom,
I look in the mirror, and do some more searching.
I pick the reflection apart.
And then search for something else.

Anyways, please bring me back, and close the door behind you when you leave. It's spring, and there are bugs outside.

(p.s, i left the key under the welcome mat.)

Oh, why are you so quiet?
What are you thinking?
I will pick you apart,
Piece by piece,
Until there is nothing left,
Until I'm sure you hate me.

"California girls,
Are unforgettable,
Daisy dukes,
Bikinis on top!"

Oh.

I am cursed.
Handed down to me by my mother,
Gently,
Softly,
Whispered,
I am cursed.

"This feeling is a blessing!
To know what the soul knows,
To feel the weight of a sigh,
To know the hurt behind a tense laugh--
This feeling means you are good."

This feeling is a curse.
To bear the unknown,
To hold sharp ends of knives,
To carry the weight on my shoulders--
This feeling means I can never be just good.

Disguised as a blessing, this curse runs deep.
You feel it in your heart now, don't you?
Every creak in the forest,
Every cry,
Every sound that was not made.

It runs until you can't hide from it,
It's light so blinding you believe it to be God.
It puts it's hands on your eyes,
And cradles your face so gently.
You would be a fool to not trust it.

And it tells you to do just that--
Trust it.
It's so warm and inviting,
So you do.