My mind is a boiling sea.
It scratches me,
Tells me that I'm nothing.
How I feel isn't always how I say.
I keep a smile to hide the hurt.
To scare off people from knowing the real me.
The decayed me.
The me that hates me.
The me that destroyed me.

One minute
I find comfort in solitude,
solace in silence,
and the next.
I need someone
To laugh with,
cry with,
love.
And be loved in return.

I love you, don't you ever forget that
But I can't go in this cycle forever
I have to let go of the pain, the hurt
Erase you from my heart.
I can ease into it, only to slip and fall into the pattern
Or let you go forever, end it cold turkey

From the start I have loved you.
Running from the feelings,
All emotions blending into one,
Never-ending thoughts of "will we be together?"
Can I escape these thoughts.
I have tried and failed many times.
Seeing you, holding you makes it harder
Can't shake the urge to ask, "Give me a chance?"
Only I already know the answer, "No."

Friendzone
Teenage Purgatory
Like a mirage of an oasis
In a sweltering desert
When they're happy
It brightens the world
When they're sad
Your world erodes
When you look at them
You see utter brilliance
Magnificence
Perfectness
But when they see you
They only see one thing:
Friend