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Oct 2010 · 1.6k
Thankful For The Pain
Shayla Oct 2010
I have had my heart broken,
I’ve hurt and I’ve cried,
I’ve been used and abused,
Built up and pushed to the side.
I have seen the darkness,
Searched for the light,
Been through so much wrong,
Wondered if I’d ever know right.
I’ve been let down and cheated,
Felt alone and afraid,
Been with guys who would break,
Every promise they made.
I’ve dated the cool guy,
The **** and the clown,
But every guy managed,
To turn my smile to a frown.
When I thought hope was lost,
That I’d never find love,
You came into my life,
Like you were sent from above.
Though I’ve been through the worst,
The clouds and the rain,
I can now say I’m thankful,
For all of the pain.
For the past is what got me,
Where I am today,
With you by my side,
In a love here to stay.
Aug 2010 · 13.5k
Goodbye, I'll miss you
Shayla Aug 2010
Life is never easy
But we never stop to think
How fast the time goes by
What can change in just a blink
We take people for granted
Thinking they are here to stay
We always think goodbye
Is very far away
I wish that I could stop time
And keep you here with me
But I know that change is constant
And I must set you free
I'm thankful for our story
Though I wish it wouldn't end
I am grateful for your presence
In my life as my best friend
I know I'll never tell you
Because we said this was just fun
I'll never say 'I love you'
It would only make you run
Please don't think I'm bitter
Because that isn't how I feel
I just wish we had a chance
To take a shot at something real
Here is where I walk away
Before I start to cry
Because even though you say it's not
I know this is goodbye
You'll forever hold a special place
Deep inside my heart
I'll always hold you close
Even if we are apart
I know you'll find success
In whatever you do
I hope you find what you're looking for
Goodbye, I will miss you
May 2010 · 1.4k
Cigarette
Shayla May 2010
She brings it to her mouth
And slowly lights the tip
As she thinks about her life
On which she's quickly losing grip
You see her life is full of memories
That grow more painful every day
She expels smoke from her lips
And with it floats away
With each puff it turns to ash
That falls unnoticed to the ground
The same as when she screams inside
But no one seems to hear a sound
This was inspired by a homeless girl I saw in NYC sitting on the corner smoking a cigarette.
May 2010 · 844
When Did You Know
Shayla May 2010
Did you know it from the start
That I was not the one
Was all of this a game to you
Were you only having fun
Did you know when you said the words
That made me melt inside
That this would amount to nothing more
Than a roller coaster ride
Did you know in the dead of night
When you'd whisper in my ear
That the words you spoke were only
Things that I wanted to hear
How could you make me feel so much
I don't understand it yet
How can you walk away feeling nothing
When I'm still trying to catch my breath
Every time you held me close
Did you know you'd set me free
When did you know it wasn't love
When did you know it wasn't me
May 2010 · 674
Instead of You
Shayla May 2010
It's been a year since you've been gone
By now you'd think that I'd moved on
But I'm still not ready for goodbye.
I still dream of it at night
Of screeching tires and bright headlights
But I still have yet to cry.
You know I see you everywhere
Anywhere I go, I feel you there
I just keep asking myself why.
Why, instead of touching your face
Am I tracing letters on a stone?
Why, even though I was with you
Did you have to die alone?
And even though you're in a better place
Why can't I see your face?
How can this nightmare be true?
Why wasn't it me instead of you?
Feb 2010 · 2.6k
The Best I Ever Had
Shayla Feb 2010
Pictures of the past year
Slowly flood my mind
Pictures of the memories
Of things we left behind.
I've learned so much through growing up
That I didn't know before
I've learned that love can hurt you
But leave you coming back for more.
I've learned that you'll lose people
You thought you'd always know
And sometimes you should hide your feelings
Instead of letting them show.
If you don't expect things
You never get let down
I've learned that you can scream inside
Without making a sound.
I've learned pictures don't replace memories
You'll still wish you were there
And the one who said they always would
May suddenly just not care.
Among all of the bad things
I've learned that there's good too
And at every story's end
Is the start of something new.
So here's to all our yesterdays
And whatever tomorrow brings
Here's to all you've done for me
For giving me my wings.
You've changed my life in countless ways
You taught me how to fly
Now I'll do something for you
I'll turn and say goodbye.
I wish you luck in finding
Everything you're looking for
You're the strongest person I've ever met
My friend, my love and so much more.
I was blessed to have you in my life
Even if only for a while
Promise me that no matter what
You're always going to smile.
Know no matter what you do
You're always in my heart
That I'm only a phone call away
No matter how far we are apart.
Maybe someday we'll find each other
And start this love again
If not know I'll always love you
No matter how this ends.
Now it's time for us to smile
There's no reason to be sad
I'll always be grateful for you
You were the best I ever had.
Jan 2010 · 1.1k
Two Girls
Shayla Jan 2010
Two girls, both fifteen
To one life is kind, to the other life is mean
The first is an average girl, going out and having fun
The second girl is pregnant, learning to raise a little one.
One goes shopping, she can't wait for the dance
The other cries herself to sleep, praying for a second chance.
The first girl is a size zero and has a beautiful smile
The second doesn't feel pretty, she shops in the maternity
aisle.
One gets dressed up, it's finally prom night
The other heads to the hospital to put up a fight.
The first girl has fun, she dances night till day
The second makes a decision, she'll give her baby girl away.
One girl goes to bed after talking on the phone
The other won't sleep until Lacey has a good home.
Seasons change and years go by,
It's amazing how fast the time can fly.
One girl raises a family and directs the kindergarten play
One thinks about her baby and wonders, "Where is she?
Is she okay?"
The first girl has all she ever dreamed of and lives with no
regrets
The second's past still haunts her, she tries but can't
forget.
Inspired by a family member's experience
Jan 2010 · 1.3k
The Fence
Shayla Jan 2010
Walking by the school yard,
No children out to play
I remember when it looked alive,
But it looks dead to me today.
I run my fingers along the fence,
And feel the start to numb
I wish the rest of me would too,
Wish i could escape who I've become.
I feel an empty hole inside,
Where my innocence used to be
I don't know why, but lately,
It's been difficult to just believe.
I wish I could go back,
To days of make-believe and pretend
Before "Remembers" and "Maybes",
Left me with wounds to mend...
Jan 2010 · 867
Tiny Dancer
Shayla Jan 2010
Be careful with your heart boy,
Tiny Dancer's coming through.
She'll show you a good time,
But she won't fall in love with you.
She'll dance right through your life,
As if she's dancing to a song.
Don't attach - when summer ends,
Your Tiny Dancer will be gone.
Because her dance is one of freedom,
Always ending with a bow.
Don't ask her to stay or love you,
Tiny Dancers don't know how.
Jan 2010 · 1.5k
I Wish You Stayed
Shayla Jan 2010
I want you to tell me
Where it is that I went wrong
Why I feel like such a stranger
Where I used to belong
It has gotten hard to see you
'Cause I don't know you anymore
And I long for things to be
The way they were before
Because before it felt so good
To always have you there
Before I stopped being good enough
And you decided not to care
I know I lost you before
But it didn't hurt this way
Call me a wishful thinker
But this time I thought you'd stay
I don't think I'll ever stop missing
The way you made me feel
Others have told me I'm beautiful
But only you made it seem real
You didn't have to make promises
You knew you couldn't keep
They play over in my head
As I try to fall asleep
Why did you come back to me
If you knew that you would leave
Why did you tell me lies
That you knew I would believe
Were you lying when you told me
That I'd always be the best
Because you left me here feeling
Like I'm no better than the rest
If I was just another girl to you
I wish you'd just left me alone
Because the feeling I'm not good enough
Is one I've already known

— The End —