I look down and I see
My body lying there,
Cold, Dead.
There is no noise
But I see the flashing lights.
I see all the people gathered,
Like a party,
Thrown just for me.
I notice my parents,
Their eyes filled with tears,
But not of joy,
I wonder why?
Then I feel a tug,
Like a rope around my waist
Pulling me up,
I’m not ready so I fight it
I sink closer to my body
I hear a voice telling me its time.
“time for what?”
I reply
Time to go.
The tugging begins again.
I’m not ready,
So I fight it again.
I fall closer to my body.
I feel a pull.
My vision goes dark.
I open my eyes
And see my mom.
I take my first breath
And taste the smoke in the air
My first thought?
I have just left the
Perfect, Blissful
Heaven,
And re-entered the
Pain and Despair
We call life
And I couldn’t be happier.
It wasn’t my time.
Only I can decide.

These songs are my words.
of Sorrow. of Joy. of Pain.
They keep the numbness
from my brain.
They tell me how
the sun beats down,
of its warmth and happiness.
And even though it’s dark and grey
Their attempts never sway.
These songs are my words
of Desperation. of Bliss. of Fear.
They tell me what I need to hear,
that I am beautiful with some quirks.
They keep me safe and warm;
never in the way of harm.
These songs are my words
when I don’t know what to say.
Please,
Don’t take them away.