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Jan 2013 · 960
A Deadly Game
Secret Garden Jan 2013
The pain slowly rises up from the toenails of swollen feet, begging to thrive, to not be released... Pulling you in, like an over needy friend, drowning remorse sounds hollow and coarse. 
A master of reality design, she finally began to analyze, who was this boy and what did he want, why was it him that got what he got? 
An advocate for the weak, something only some can understand, she never had any idea that he was nothing like most men... He was purely a design, a fragment of her mind, a poorly put together story that rhymed, so alone is where she cries, trying again to analyze. 
She finds a poem to recite 
A voice if she might
Fight this new found stage fright
So many times, they stood at the end of the stage, silently filling her heart with rage. 

She ran
She ran as far away from home as she could with that man,
With packs too heavy and without an open hand, together they ran. 
Him from his choices, her from those voices 
They kept screaming she would fail. 

She wanted to run far enough away that by the time she was home they wouldn't know what to say.. But she came home and had to stay.

Reanalyze the pain. 

See again what she had left in shame. 

The pain. 

Please God be with her, please help her pray, please come down to her, and take her pain away

He held her down and blindfolded her, whispered in her ear that she was flying, and then blew wind in her hair as she was crying, calling it Ocean Air. Salty. 

How dare me.
Jul 2012 · 1.7k
Happy Birthday, Friend.
Secret Garden Jul 2012
I opened this card, to write to you, a birthday wish or two
but my pen touched the paper, and there wasn't anything I could do...
I felt the need to try and tell you,
about all of the things you do...
about your rolls at home,
or the streets you've roamed,
or the way you don't have the slightest clue
(although soon I am reminded, indeed you actually do...)
I wanted you to know,
I admire your mundane, unobtrusive, unforgiving glow
I admire your leadership, in an unbiased, newborn, kind of way.
I tell you Thanks, for more, than when you hold open the door...
Which you would probably do... Without anyone asking you...

I used to write stories about what everyone was doing wrong...
Then I would talk to you and write a poem,
and it was more like a textbook, written with life...
and in life, the reality of death, and all that death meant.

there was a calming sensation that I finally kept...

from all that I know, and from all that I've seen,
       which is my only tangible reality...
I have come to the conclusion that you are a man from their dreams...

The Gods, and the Goddesses, that mythologically once sat around a table and hand picked each perfect little atom into what would one day become the likes, of you and me.

Inspiring beyond comprehension the only thing I can do is let the pen lend...a few words... or phrases... heavier than mentioned my heart races with tension when I try and envision that dimension and remember that lesson, about doing good with the time we're given...

I stop, and I smile. And I say thank you again, because you're the most refreshing of men. You are touching lives, and I want you to know, I am blessed, and speechless, and full of pride to stand here telling you Happy Birthday, tonight.

If ever I gave someone the feeling you give me,  my only hope is that their pen becomes just as heavy, and  they write about what it meant to them, to have a new place, for a life long friend.
May 2012 · 1.2k
Are You Here?
Secret Garden May 2012
The way the thunder rolls through every nerve in every tip of every finger
as she types words she did not know she had inside her,
she is confronted with a passion that looks similar to desire
she is tempted, and she plays with fire

With a firecness not yet like the lion
she allows fears to conspire
and while she is longing for attention
he put himself in detention
refusing to break through
allowing fears to consume
she didn't have even the slightest clue....

I found happiness inside of me
the way life had designed me
I am a pawn and I have yet to be played
forget me not, in my fits of rage
for I see life different but the same..

Thank God he forced me to become more awake
in a way I had never found more mistakes
but an innocence that whispered it would all be okay...
for in the depth of emotion do we find the words we call potions

Froget me not, you Charming Prince,
forget me not, in a blissful kiss,
forgive me my dear,
and forget your fears
forget your worries and be with me,
here.

You saw yourself writing dreams,
while my plans began looking a little naive
and as I find me,
you are forced to find you,
but I pray that we find each other soon

I am me, and you are you, and if we end up together,
its through the storms that we have weathered
May 2012 · 638
thebreakupsong
Secret Garden May 2012
Not too sure which card to play,
Not too sure which words to say,
Finding it harder every day,
To be the person who asks you to stay,
     Make the pain fade,
              Make the song play,
                                 Make this sadness go away,
                                         Just tell me after everything
                                              *It will all be okay...
May 2012 · 1.9k
A Writer Will Never Die
Secret Garden May 2012
Let your soul bleed
let the words that are your everything
be heard by a thousand enemies
put down change for them to read
explain how you are not so different,
or better yet,
explain to them how different you are

Let your soul bleed
let every piece of every microscope thing
be felt inside the core of every humans being...

Let the words pour through you,
like never before
let the fire from your most passionate desires
be heard by a thousand minds you have inspired


Let your soul bleed....

Let your heart scream....

Let your self have everything you need...


Breathe


Because a writer, never dies..
through their fingertips they have an instant copyright
and with love as the only motive they accept life is passing by
but if they write their words in blood they live an eternal life
because she replied how forever was at least worth a try..

You will never die....

Your soul is something that can always stay alive...

You may loose your body, but not your essence of life...


scream


No one ever lied. No one ever said it would be easy ..
they all said it would be hard, and whispered confusing
but they gave you the tools, that some day you would use
now its your job to tighten any screws coming loose

**Happiness is a way of life...you choose...
Secret Garden May 2012
There was once an angel with one broken wing,
that had a vision of regrowth at the end of a dream,
woke up one morning and began fixing things

finished mending her method of flight,
again had the freedom to fly through the sky,
however fast, however high, however wrong, however right

And one day she was going about,
saw a spark of light amidst a very dark cloud,
she spoke to him and asked his name,
with no reply he only slowly grinned,
with the flash of a smile,
she was consumed by him

She stayed in captivity for a while unseen,
until again she awoke from a lucid dream,
determined to change everything
insisted she knew exactly how to break free

So she fought and she fought to knock the walls down,
but eventually found she had an easy way out,
slipped right though that crack and swore she'd never look back

As she flew she began to grow cold,
and it seemed she had forgotten where it was she had to go,
she flew in circles hoping no one would know,
but soon enough her secret was exposed

She asked for a hug,
to be reminded of love,
the way the maker had intended...
Wanting more she took out a loan
on a garden she was determined to grow

As the flowers bloomed she was again consumed
by the power of the spark,
as light shined through, her keeper knew,
she was ready again for what only he could do

She was surprised by the spark, his eyes pure blue,
his voice of reason so fresh, so new,
a past more broken, held together with glue
than the one she was fighting,
with a blindfold and noose

She made it through a great depression,
or so her mind had made her think,
but she was still young, and so very naive
this was a plan she could never foresee
So she went along, with the bigger plan,
learning how to let things happen,
discovering life, in a completely new light
making sense of the unimagined

She spent a day in silence,
tuning the entire atmosphere out,
and when she waited for the voice to come,
she was able to hear the sound

A voice so calm and steady,
familiar sweet and heavy,
telling her she's ready,
for the test she would be getting

It told her to stop, and slow it all down,
look at things a little differently now,
eliminate hate, and jealousy,
replace it with positivity

That loving yourself is the key to it all,
the only way to be sure you can handle the fall,
the right way to get through it even if you have to crawl,
the best way to ensure, the engines wont stall

As she began to understand this,
she no longer ignored pain,
she accepted these things for just what they were,
and started living again

And on a little journey,
she took with his spark today,
she found that he had found himself,
along the broken way

Again she was consumed,
but in a positive sort of way,
never again would she look
at any spark the same

The angel and that spark,
sit now on a different level,
holding hands tight like handles,
passion burning like candles,
caught up in the blaze
            her plans went up in shambles

And maybe its the shambles,
that builds the stories end,
of a love that will never be lost,
and the finding of a friend

Forgive me while I sit here,
without too much to say,
but I find I become speechless,
when our souls begin to play

Push me, pull me, love me, hold me.
May 2012 · 806
A Different State of Mind
Secret Garden May 2012
I thought it was a disease,
The way it had it's hold on me
But I was the one who was sick you see
I wanted to run, this time only physically
I let my mind rest, and suddenly it hit me

I was the rock kissing the dirt on the ground
Waiting to be forgotten or kicked around
So I asked for help and help was found

No longer waiting to be picked from the crowd
Standing my ground on the other side of town
I took a step back and came back wondering how

How did I waste, so many nights?
Looking for the answer, I was trying to hide
Reminding myself, I had to remember it right

When I asked for an angel, she sent me a few,
Gave me the tools, and a new book or two
Told me to read, and to write it all down,
Told me not to worry about the weight of the crown

She some how managed to show me,
I couldn't even stay in count
And the greatest gift I'd ever gotten,
Was learning how to slow it all down
Listening to the rhythm
A simple monotonous beat
A rather tedious feat
If you do ask me...

... I realized how much potential, waited in those keys...

The lessons were simple,
But simply never stated
But even in the afterlife,
She is trying to relay it

How thankful I am for the gift of her hand
Patiently teaching patience to me

So sing with me, just one more song,
The way no body's ever heard before...
Sing with me, and they'll come along,
Leaving worries not anywhere close to my door

Sing to me, until I fall asleep,
About those wooden ships, and lucid dreams
Sing to me, until I fall asleep, til my ears bleed and I begin to weep
Sing to me, until I no longer breathe and we make them see
living in song is all we can be

So sing that simple song to me..
May 2012 · 623
Too Tired
Secret Garden May 2012
Trying to juggle daydreams and night schemes,
Staying clean and flying free,
No one ever told her there wasn't ever a key
To the city they talked about under the sea
Where the buildings made of gold replaced liter in the streets
And happy was the saddest emotion you could ever be
Children were born knowing they could sing
And walking wasn't as impossible as some make it seem
No one ever told her there wasn't ever a key

How far will you go questioning if ends met means,
When did you know you would give up your dreams
I refuse to be the one that trampled your needs
If we can't walk together we can't walk as a team

I am begging you please, please, wait for me...
I'll catch up soon but I was being held back,
By the emotions you're teaching me
And the compassion you lack
How is it our lives found the same track?
When will reality be coming back?
Is this a fairy tale or a proven fact?

I'm tired too but not holding back
"I'm tired," doesn't mean I won't hear you
I may be tired but I live to be near you
We all get tired but I will stay up
So I can be the one you wake to
Apr 2012 · 812
With Two Black Eyes
Secret Garden Apr 2012
With two black eyes she refused to cry
She held it inside until thoughts of him had finally died
When she finally was free from anger and pride
She danced for the moon as her soul found the light

She graciously tip-toed in a gown made of lace
Thanking God above for helping her hold on to her faith

Remembering a song she heard some time before
She was ready and waiting, with the chains that she wore

When that day came, and the battle began
She was not the one with the gun in her hand
Instead she was waiting, accepting her fate
Until the gun didn't fire, and the realization was made

When the bullet of reality had finally hit her
She looked at his poor soul and saw what he had always been after
So she left that fight with her head held high
Because today was not her day to die

She called for help from around the block
Armed and dangerous was the message they felt
When they arrived and he pulled out his knife
The officer felt in fear of his life

With two black eyes she refused to cry
She held it inside until the day that he died
When she was finally free from anger and pride
*She danced for the moon as her soul found the light.
Apr 2012 · 1.0k
The Happy Little Writer
Secret Garden Apr 2012
I knew a girl named Sally,
Her mom bought her a new pen,
Told her it was a magic wand,
Full of stories she had to tell them

Her mom bought a journal,
With the phrase,
"Your words can change the world"
Written in script on every page

She carried her journal with pride,
By day and by night,
She began understanding
She had the power to write

As her work progressed,
Her stories soon played out
She found the voice she never knew she possessed
Was heard when she wrote it down

So she began telling stories,
Of how people made her feel,
How Johnny gave her butterflies,
But didn't know that she was real

She told a long tale
About a friend she used to have,
Cindy from across the street
Who taught her how to sing

She wrote a lengthy novel,
About Martha Ann Gustavo
Who could play the Grand Piano
Better then Mr. Oswaldo

She colored a few pictures,
With her magic fun filled pen,
To illustrate the points she made
And to give more life to them

Its funny how your mind works,
When you let yourself find out,
You're capable of so much more
When you don't fill your head with doubts
Mar 2012 · 795
Believe
Secret Garden Mar 2012
As the snowflakes touch her tear glazed face
Their grip gets tighter as they hit the brakes
On the life they found when they quit running in place,
Or walking, in his case....

The way you could feel it in the way that they moved
Or hear it in their soft sung blues
Or taste it in the drinks they brewed
While seeing it in their efflorescent views

And all at once they were walking in pace,
She kept his pattern without want or haste
But evanescent it was when it came to change
They were thrown a curve ball in a dangerous game

Suddenly their lives encumbered so much more,
They began seeing the light inside each open door,
And the incipient love that they created in war,  
Took a new form that seemed to effortlessly soar

100,000 miles wouldn't keep them apart
They would fight to the death for this serendipitous art
No matter where she was it was never too far,
Without saying a word, he spoke straight to her heart

Road blocks were detoured and hurdles were jumped,
We maintained a hold on our love and refused to get stuck,
Devote time to each other,
And never give up

If you haven't found what you're looking for,
Close your eyes, and look down at the floor
Spin in a circle, five or six times,
Let yourself get lost in your altered mind

Remember the best things,
Aren't things that you find...
They find you,
At an undeclared time

Quit putting your effort
Into finding "The One"
And allow yourself
To have some fun...

I understand your need to run,
But I've found walking brought out the sun
And my empty hand was filled it seemed
The second I allowed myself to breathe

All you have to do,
is simply *believe
Mar 2012 · 1.9k
The Problem with Today
Secret Garden Mar 2012
What our generation really needs
Is to open their eyes and see
That we are capable of so much more,
Than Facebook and MTV,
That we are in control
of the media we see,
That we listen to the songs,
with the same simple boring beats,
"I'm ****, and I know it,"
is a pathetic waste of a could-be poet
16 and Pregnant, has children trying to do it,
Like,

"I can raise a baby, if whats her face did fine,
You don't have to use protection,
just promise you'll always be mine"


When the birth control she swore she took at four
Doesn't always work,
He promises to help,
And her mom doesn't even yell,
But her mom was happy for Herself...

She thinks about it every night,
With no one that understands,
How happy she was,
When he said "Don't give it up"

If only their future went as planned..

...When every other weekend,
Never comes around,
She becomes a single mother,
With inexperience and doubts...

Now I'm not saying this is directed,
To any one I'll meet,
But it still should be a lesson,
The teachers try and teach..

The message isn't getting through,
And these children will one day be
The presidents and doctors,
That this society will always need

Its time to take control,
Of the lack of common care,
They should put inside the syllabus,
"You must know its rude to stare"
Or maybe fund a field trip,
To a nursing home close by,
I think the children of today,
Have lost the concept of time

I bet if you asked a stranger,
They would be happy to sit and read
From the pages of their memories,
Still clear enough to see

The Berlin Wall come crashing down,
Or a television turn on..
The way nothing went to movement,
And then movement turned to sound,
And black and whites every Friday night
became the agenda for the town

The little country store,
on the corner of 5th and main
would have everything you could ever need,
because they lived in a time of simplicity

Before cell phones, and Instagram
Before laptops were littered with spam,
Before 8 tracks and video tapes
Before Call of Duty and Myspace

Everyone wants to tell you,
Whether they admit they do or not,
But too many people aren't questioned,
Before the memories all stop

I don't want any story
To ever go untold,
Because no one ever asked them,
If they'd simply played a sport
Or if they had been to a circus,
Or on a private plane,
Or in any kind of service,
Or if they had ever hopped a train
Or had been to a concert, or their views on Fate..
Try, "How would you sum up an entire decade?"

Everyone has a voice,
And everyone wants to be heard,
Everyone is capable,
Of looking up the words,
Ignorance is over,
It is time to see the light,
We are the ones who will prohibit those guns,
We are the ones who will fight
We are the ones who will be forced to be heard,
No suit and tie can silence our cries

If we all stand together,
Refusing to believe the lies,
We can escape this future together,
But we have to actually try
Mar 2012 · 962
Empty Out The Excess
Secret Garden Mar 2012
Everything isn't so complicated..
If we just remembered how to breathe
Took the good with the bad
The bad with the ugly
There are just some things in life
That we all have to see

Everyone has a story,
They'd probably tell you honestly
But will yours be one worth telling,
When your the Grandma across the street?

Let your thoughts speak, feel free to jump in at any time
and give me a piece of your pondering mind


Too often we are caught up in the possibilities
That we forget to see when things are happening
And when they're happening is when they matter
Because when they're not they don't exist..

Too often we fill our minds,
Like her over flowing carry on
With extras, and don't-needs,
Your travel-size scrabble game
And a book you'll never read..

Empty out that baggage you store,
Replace it with something you'll use a lot more,
A pen and a paper..in case something pops in your head...
A camera, to capture the moment your in..
A daily log, of all your to-do's
And just in case, travel size tissues

Getting rid of excess,
Makes you really analyze whats left,
And you might be surprised to find,
You are happier with less

I think if we took the time and tried,
To throw the useless stuff away,
We could fill up the empty spaces
With tools we use all day
And maybe our generation,
Could finally make a change

So take your pen and paper,
And write what makes you laugh,
Then turn that full page over,
And write what makes you sad,
And when you are finished,
With these lists that you just made,
It might look a little bit clearer,
That you held a lot of extra weight..

It doesn't have to be fancy,
Your phone works all the same,
But a time line of your moments,
Looks pretty good in frames

Make a list, from the top of your head,
In a way you can understand,
Make your self accountable
And follow through with them,
And if you just can't make it,
Be nice enough to call,
Just hope that the next guy who does it to you,
will be polite enough, to at least try and get through

My grandma always had tricks,
Shoved way up her sleeve,
Never ceasing to amaze me,
What prepared really means,
When the moment cannot wait,
and your shirts not allowed,
they aren't much to pack around

Its amazing what you could do,
With those few little things,
Once you give up,
what is stopping you
And make a mental change
Mar 2012 · 912
Devour My Passion
Secret Garden Mar 2012
Its amazing how much I chose to expose
Put our lives center stage on a spot-light pedestal
Read allowed every stanza that I'd never really heard
Understood the real message,
Not just a mixture of words

As every line flowed right back through me,
I realized your words have more of a meaning
In the time line of my life,
no matter how fleeting,
The thought of you is as easy as unconsciously breathing
Forever's just word with an ever changing meaning
And after everything is said and done,
I'm still stuck here singing...
    
Write me a song,
Sing it louder then before
Devour my passion
Then show yourself the door

It never was enough,
no matter how much baggage I tried to give up
You were starting battles while I was ending wars
But do not confuse a warm welcome, for an always open door

I have spent a lot time where I am,
whether you know I have or not,
I wasn't willing to give up my land
I was refusing to sell my lot,
But the lot that I was trapped in,
Was borrowed from the start
So when they took it from me,
I found a home inside my heart
I worked hard for the family
that I would die for today,
"We can't pick ones we started with,"
but we can pick the ones who stay

Write me a song,
Sing it louder then before,
Devour my passion
Then show yourself the door
Complications have me lost in a mental whirl-wind
Never have I felt more lost,
Then when you've felt more certain
I'm curious to know my love,
If you've thought about it much,
Did you ever stop to question,
Have you always pictured us?

I've read what you have written,
About everyone else it seems,
I wonder if you still like to write
Anything about me

Write me a song
Sing it louder then before
Devour my passion
Then show yourself the door

— The End —