oh mygod,ohmy god
stop ******* talking about your martyr complex
some of us arent enjoying this
(THE STATE OF BEING INFERIOR)
(it's okay, dont worry about that weird taste in your mouth
it goes away after a few hours)

My brain is filled with static


I feel like I'm not here

I feel no pain
I feel no pleasure

How can I tell if I exist...


All I can hear is white noise
runningthroughmyhead
softsoftfuzzfuzz

All I can see is blurs of color
greenandwhitesandbrowns
ohmy

All I can smell is nonexistant
airrushesthroughholes
nothinghappens

All I can feel is without reaction
dryhandscoldteeth
don'tcaredon'tcare

All I can taste is tasteless
coatofliquidonmytongue
pleasantunpleasantneutral




Ma­ybe this is what it's like to be. Or not be.

And ohmy
your lips are so
sweet and smooth and wet and soft and
gentle.
And I'm considering the possibility that maybe
you're all I need.
Ever,
forever.
That maybe,
no definitely,
you are my smile when I wake up in the morning,
you are my sigh before I fall asleep.
And you make me so happy that I
scream
and
do happy dances
and
wonder how I ever lived without you.
You give me that sort of choking happy feeling in my throat
and it feels like the joy is about to come bursting out.
And I love falling asleep with
the faint smell of your cologne in my hair
and
the taste of your lips still on mine.
And when you laugh and lean in for a kiss,
I still sometimes marvel.