I have been an avid reader of you for two years
sticking with you through every fat melting, curve creating, ‘scientifically tested,’ filling, plumping, thinning… lie
Dear Mr Magazine
I was there through every fad, every phase, every diet…
and now, it is now, it is only now, that I realise.
Dear Mr Magazine
I realise that even though I was there for you, you were never there for me
wrapping me up in your pages
I thought you were a blanket of warmth and solidarity in a world that only lied…
but you were the liar
Dear Mr Magazine you lied to me and I trusted you
I wrapped up my heart in your pages to absorb what would make me beautiful
because I could never really be beautiful, could I Mr Magazine?
Dear Mr Magazine
you gifted us with a free makeup brush and a trip to the psych ward
you gifted us with ‘TOP 10 TIPS TO PLEASE YOUR MAN!’ and an eating disorder
you gifted us with diet shake recipes and bottles of green happy pills
Dear Mr Magazine
I was an avid reader of you for two years
sticking with you even though you never stuck by me
I wrapped my trust up in your pages and you swallowed it with smiling white teeth
Dear Mr Magazine
you tear away little girls self esteem like I am tearing you now
the rip of your pages slowly pumps belief back through my heart
I cannot believe I let you control me for so long!
Dear Mr Magazine
I just want to thank you
thank your shreds lying on my bedroom floor
I just want to thank you
for showing me what it’s like to live
as a ghost of myself

Outside my door
There's a magazine

I can't step outside my door
There's a magazine

I can't sleep
There's a magazine

I can't eat
There's a magazine

I can't breathe
There's a magazine

What happens when I open my door?
Will the magazine **** me?
Will it tear our my eyes?
Eat my flesh?
Drink my blood?

What will it do?
Well
I'm not willing to find out.

I can't live.
There's a magazine.