i really thought this would be
( f o r e v e r )
so why are we
f
a
l
l
i
n
g
apart?

no, dear, it wasn't you. it was
me. it's always me and my selfish,
no-good heart that's only full of
desires for every single thing i can't
have.

i love every single thing about you;
the way your:
smile melted away the pain in my chest,
eyes spoke every word you couldn't say,
voice chased away every fear that held me down.
flaws and imperfections didn't turn me away,
but they drew me into the beautiful wreck
that you were/are/will always be.

"if all you ever wanted was love,"
you whisper in three-twenty-two
morning darkness, "then why are
you pushing it away?"

(i don't know) i wish i didn't know,
and i wish i didn't have to tear
myself apart so viciously just to
find an answer to give you - one that
won't break your heart and ruin
the only good thing i've ever known.

"why are we falling apart?"
it's not you, love.
it's me.

i like the way you feel
beneath, on, above, near me,
anywhere that you are close enough
that the breath of us two
becomes one

you:
a body of water, calm,
mostly still but surface trembling,
you capture the beauty around you
and shine

me:
the flame of a candle burning,
watching, learning the way you move,
i am reflected in you and
upon your surface i dance

us:
the other day i was thinking,
trying to decide if we were
the calm before the storm,
the storm,
or the storm’s aftermath
today i decided that there
is nothing wrong with us
being all three

in my mind i touch you and it’s magic.
you are nothing short of a work
of art.

but in reality,
i glance at you from the corner
of my tired eyes,
i don’t know if you know
when i look at you like this,
but i kind of hope you do,
because it would be easier
for you to find out that way
than for me to tell you
with worn-out words
how i (think) i (might) feel
and how i should(n’t) feel
this way.

years will come and go
and i will wait here,
in the place where logic
runs headfirst into
the ocean called love
and drowns.

i love you like the
moon loves the north
star

like the rain loves
the storm

like a fire loves
the forest, the fire
that burns on your
fingertips and scars
across my dove-feathered
skin;

the way the robins
and the crows love
the bittersweet burn
of the morning sun.

i love you like it's
the first time i've
loved, like every kiss
is the first one,

the way butterflies
erupt into my chest
every time your eyes
meet mine,

the way a cloud can
only hold a tornado
for so long, i love
you in so many

uncontrollable ways.

i love you like the
last and only time i've
loved, like the only
hope for me is you,

like the way it's
darkest just before
dawn.

i love you because
i know i shouldn't.