my darling,
you were my heaven -
hallowed be thy veins.
thy kingdom come, my affection won.
your love, though a hellfire, was heaven.
give me a chance to clear my head.
forgive me, for not recognizing
your voice among the masses,
as i forgive those who break my trust.
lead me not into isolation
but deliver me from myself.
for thine is the space
here in my ribcage
forever & ever.
amen.

- m.f.

I feel him through my bones like the way the whiskey made me feel okay again

slowly, then all at once.


I could see his hands on the ******* of another woman and his eyes wanting her like the way I cried and yelled his name alone on my bed

passionately, and undiluted


I saw his face smiling at my stories and jokes like the way the words "I love you" fell out of his mouth

forced, and heartbreakingly austere


I stopped crying over him like the way I finished the painting on my easel

I never did.

Choices are demanding.
They either benefit both parties, either one, or neither.  A constant give and take, a prosperous economy.  Never yielding, never waiting, ever lurking, ever close.
You can't control the choices you will have to make, nor can you control the outcome.  You cannot choose your consequence, and you cannot choose your reward.
It is either meant to be, or it isn't.  It is predestined.  This was written.
You are doomed with the certainty of fate.