I close my eyes not for good but only just a moment to rest my eyes and clear my thoughts. I open my eyes and I strangely grow mad, I wish they were closed for good. As I walk through the high school doors I realize I still have 1 more long year of this torture. my emotions grow stronger as I drag the silver across my wrist and my outer thigh, I see the liquid drip out and I can taste the bitter sweet taste of blood dance across my tongue.

no one understands how much pain im in, how badly I want to end my life and just ****** give up. I understand ive ****** up and made many mistakes with my life... (drugs, drinking, sneaking out, ext.) however im sick of the bashing and hateful things. im old enough to know better but young enough not to give a **** so stop!

no one ever believes me. I tell everyone im broken and hurt, but all you ever say is your being dramatic or your such a attention seeker but will you believe me when Im dead? when I hang myself from the bedroom light? or when you come home and find the snow to be stained red cause I cut my wrists so deep while making fallen snow angels that I bled out? when will you believe me?

theres a girl in the corner with tear stains in eyes from the places wondered and the secrets she hides. she says how did I get here im not who I once was. so she trys to get better then shes to weak to try. she doesn't know who she is anymore. shes tired shes worn her heart is heavy from the work it takes to continue to live everyday.

she  cigarette with bundles of tears racing down her cheeks and after her lips some how found the strength to smile I thought to myself, "sometimes when chaos burns like a wildfire around us; we cant help but love its warmth."