Sometimes I think about
Your lips on mine
Brown eyes gently closed
Nose to nose

I drag them out
Breath and time
Curious about your taste
Lips locked, interlaced

You need to know
The kind of power you wielded against me
And how you had me at your mercy
Like a lion and a deer
I had a raw, animal magnetism to you
But also a stunning fear
Everything you did had me in your control
And you didn’t even realize
You didn’t even see the reactions
You invited with your lust and your greed
And a need for my skin
You didn’t understand how much you
Made me feel, like art in my soul
And blood on my hands
I want you, need you to know this
Because I want you to feel the pain I did
Understand the power you had over me
The power you abused.
And maybe it’ll scare you from ever doing it again.

Feelings explode from my chest
Like honey, hot and sticky
Set off by hours of smoke

Finally realized in the fade
My hard edges fraying
In the fire of curling greens
Expectations only rising when I do

High on the idea of you
On the feeling and taste of you
Lips tattooed on my skin

I just want to run my fingers through your hair
Lay my head on your chest
Feel your heartbeat pound
Speak softly of my care
And slowly
Slowly
Fall asleep
With you

Everything I do
Is for attention
But it is only you
That I want the attention
From
And somehow
In this toxic cycle
I hurt me and you
More than love is
Worth

He says, you need
To look at yourself
Your pain and flaws
Address those things
Before coming to me
Because I don’t want
To be
Your other half
You need to be whole
On your own.

Why do I crave
Your attention
This late at night
All I need
Is your breath
In mine
To stay alive