I suppose she saw her fading youth
Like steam from a shower on the mirror
Slowly-little by little
But all at once covering your image
Time hasn’t touched her skin yet
But she could feel it in her eyes
When she gazed upon a young set
She saw the little enthusiasm she somehow lost
Laying slumped on her bedroom floor
She couldn’t even find tears
Empty pupils, unable to find her image again.

Oh you’re beautiful
The way you tailor your love
fitting me like a glove
The way you pull up my sleeves
Expose my scars, and kissed them.
Brown eyes honey
Soothing a ever lasting storm.

You are not your mother
marriages dont always end in broke glasses and yelling
You are not your father
children don't always hold you back and ruin your life
You are not your brother
love isn't always a game that tears you apart
You are not your best friend
people can be kind and good in nature; in fact, they mostly are.
You are not anyone else except yourself
and you only
decides how your world will be like.
Evils can be found everywhere, but so can kindness.

I used to write poems for you
like a hopelessly romantic, poor, scholar.
With such fluffy words i described you
the colors, the beauty, the pedestal i held you on
but colors turn dull, beauty fades, and the marbles that once
sculped the pedestal
turned into dust
Now i read my poems
and i scoff
my ink will never run dry
and so i wrote another one for you.

Do not worry
about money- or how old youre turning
while your body still can
GO! Travel!
Sleep on ****** motel floors if you must
walk to the bus stop if you have to
Rent a tired old rusty motorcycle
Hilk that path
DO IT!
The world is yours
don't be stuck on a single page- dont be stuck in a room
GO!
SEE what the vast universe have for you!
And when you sleep-
I hope you dream of more things than what you're used to.

Naked as we came
tangled on the sheets-the sunlight nearly peaked
your skin on mine, a femine smooth and masuline rough
your chest hair did always tickle my cheeks
the smell of sweet sweet sweat in the air
"want some eggs?"
"yes please."

It wasn't personal
That's who i am
a holly golightly
terrified- of cages, of commitment, of things that held up a mirror
things that reminded me how ugly i can be
Holly Golightly had her tiffanys
me? I had my 3:00am coffee and the 7 o clock train-
steams, rails, and I'm gone.

I try not to walk that path again
Our hands tangled
For you it meant as much as pebbles did to a river
I knew that
Still, I let myself sank.
And one day- i became stale in your eyes
On that day-I can no longer walk that path again.

Like little marbles in a child's toy box
rolling around in forgotten shimmers.
A little glory that meant nothing-
that was our first kiss.
It's a perilously thin line
being in lust and being in love.

I watch you grew from nothing
to everything.
My little bean's first step
the steady heart beat that grew into marching shoes
I watched my bean put on his uniform
a little picture of me he carried in his pocket
The tiny hands that once reached for me
Are now holding onto a barrel, squeezing a trigger
I used to sit by the window
watching my bean hop off that yellow bus
shiny shoes and sun burnt cheeks
Now i sit by the window
men in uniforms holding your belongings
My little bean's face flashed in my mind like a thousand films
Those childish eyes and chubby cheeks are now for god to see
My bean will never come home to me.

Today, i found a picture of you
I cried
you were holding me as a baby
my mother standing behind you
the only complete family photo ive ever been in
you look just like me
the crooked smile, flat nose, hooded eyes
I will never know you
But i dont need to
Ive never wished heaven was real more than this moment
if any chance it is and youre smiling down
I want you to konw
mom has never said an ill word about you
thank you for being my father for a brief moment
I'm doing fine
and oh
i will never complain about my nose again
Its not ugly at all
it looks like yours.

32,400 minutes
I spent awkwardly behind a desk
stealing little glances at you.

540 hours
you never did notice me
but i know every curve of your face.

360 days
that's all i had
little glances, unfocused lessons, and that golden hair

2 souls
never colliding, frozen in small glances
one in an ignorant bliss; another drying her tears.

The feelings of new sheets
and freshly shaven legs
The smell of the ocean
in a toasty summer air
The grin of someone you passed by
a shared joy among strangers
Find those little things
that make you happy
until it becomes a habit

45 seconds of peace
I opened my eyes
my hair afloat, and my toes kicking through the water
the ocean consumes me.
45 seconds of waves
crashing on my vessel
I am cleansed
I am new

girl with moonshine in  her eyes
she danced around wildly
letting the wind catch her feet

She kissed him softly
whispering sweet nothing
in his ears, courage from alcohol

she got out of his car
drunkenly happy
no there were no promise made

she walked into her room
crying her make up off
on her desk, an unopened bottle of moonshine.

I hold your hand
from birth to death
pretty poems are often about heartaches
the day I lose you,
will be the day I write the most beautiful poem.

Goodness,
you look happy
I can see your happiness.
And boy,
she is pretty.

Her brown hair is shorter than mine,
curlier too.
Oh! She wears glasses!
How confidently she wore them.
Yes, light eyes does look good with everything.

I see you cherishing her
holding her in your palm
like a tiny pearl

I am happy for you,
if i wasnt I'd be selfish.
But that was the day,
happiness became more than a word.
It became my nightmare.

I would have thought vomits
Stroking your face
Telling you I love you
Kissing the arch of your nose
The smile that I know so familiar
You called me a silly drunk
And under the street light I laughed
Oh my friend
I was never drunk.