i picked up a new book
to find myself writing along
tapping to the beat of someone else's life

if only i could travel to the far west
where the mystery lived
to sing the songs of ancestors passing

i woke up in my dark bedroom
my thirst satisfied, my soul refreshed
the joys of reading.

I feel consumed by the thought
of dark colors rising up in my veins
like the woman lost in the yellow wallpaper
I lack the effort to lose my mind
until i go totally mad.

She chain smoked
of course, it was the 80s.
She hated herself
of course, the girl is fat
She felt her face sting the entire night
of course, he had a very long day.
She believed in herself
of course, she was foolish

and she continued on,
letting everybody make excuses
so she chain smoked.

I just wanted the world to see me
but I dont, because even I can't see myself
I look into the crystal glass
and couldn't see a future
just bursted dreams and a wicked fortune teller
she tells me things so horrible
they can only be lies

and so I lie alone on the stone pedestal
my skin bronzing under the sun
my bones toughening up with rain

I just wanted the world to see

I put the CD in the CD player
a sunset in every fall leaves
they make me think of you
of the colors that burst inside of me
my tea sat alone on the balcony
while I write letters with flowery cursive
my dearest, I said
the Paris light shines bright
grab my hand and dance.

Just her sun bleached hair
dancing on the shoreline in the dark
her toes tapping against the cold ocean water
extra gentle now
her tan skin smelled like cotton candy
her eyes looked so inspired
Something made her smell the summer salt
she would want to remember this--this 17.
She will never feel this way again
the ocean calls to her
she hears, but knocked down by waves.

There isn't a reason to do this'
He almost said.
but he didn't
and when the pen touched the paper
they were divorced
like a person who faces death
he saw his happiness flash before his eyes