he starves himself
watching the weight drop
clawing at his skin
he screams
he wants to tell them
but he hates to speak
so he shouts and yells
but everyone turns away
so he smiles and plays along
he laughs and jokes
but alone in his room he cracks


but you wont see me cry

I'm in love with
His smile his laugh
His passion
The way he brightens up a room
But he isnt ready so I'm waiting
His chocolate brown eyes
And his soft hands when he grabs mine
But he isnt ready so I'm waiting
He is my best friend
And I'm in love with everything about him
So I'm Waiting

Im loving him
His stretch marks  
His thick thighs
His chubby cheeks
I'm loving him,
Maybe not always but I'm learning
.
.
.
To love my self

I've relapsed again
i guess we all do now and then
but I'm lying here
my sheets a gentle cold
my body is a violent warmth
my pillow holds me closer than you ever did
but it's my fault isn't it
why this beautiful silence caresses me
shattered like the glass on the floor
and broken like my mirror
but its my fault isn't it
i gave you my innocence
my body
my heart
but it wasnt enough
you just continued to tear through me
leaving all the good parts behind
but its my fault isnt it
so im lying here trying to fix it
maybe if i disappear so will everything burning inside me
maybe youll see it wasnt me
can you try and talk me down
cause im getting higher
and im not scared to fall
cause im lying here
holding on to my tears
" dont cry he isnt worth it"
so im lying here
crying dying and never smiling
im beyond repair my friend
but you couldnt care less huh?







ive relapsed again
but i guess we all do now and then