There was one a seed inside of me,
it was abstract and flimsy at first.
It is now the size of your left nut,
I can feel it protruding through my gut.
The maid is in the bathroom,
cleaning up my remains from ralphing earlier.
The ******* was thick,
chunky from the omelet I'd eaten earlier.
I thought I'd stored my brain chemicals away better than that.
That, that once was a lousy piece of seed inside my cumbersome belly due to the ashes you left in my mouth yesterday.
Chewing on fiberglass,
glad we're passed that.
Not too long ago I always felt like the elephant in the room.
I was the octopus squirting slippery blue...
liquid from my eyes,
my laugh and words contorted
to form my broken leg feeling of dangled care out the window.
The wind blew my hysterical scene away,
that,
time,
and the suppliers of the missing balance in the chemistry of my mind.

My feelings towards these events are slowly unravelling themselves and soaring away like the lost feathers in my metallic bore smelling place of sleep.

I like to poison myself. It gives me health. Sheds strength onto my day. Makes the long boring times flutter away. I'll flutter away, into thin space. In my head, I begin again, waking for the evening. Hungry, foolish, eventful. Full of ***** and surprise. Dizzy, dainty, laughing, tourists go by, blinking their eyes into the distance. Do you ever zone so deep into your thoughts; fear you might get lost? Losing yourself into the day break. All costs for namesake. If I shall die, tell everyone goodbye for me. I've never truly hated anyone. I've been lost, I lose my socks, dreamed of making love on a boat-dock. We'll evolve into something greater, see to it that it goes as planned. Build yourself, create your world, environment is a whirlwind of emotion, challenge, and occasionally suicidal games of the awkward, outcast, *******. Fatherless is quite a strange sort of happiness, no one there to guide me, sister's fail almost entirely. Didn't help much, putting forth the wrong effort into focusing on all the wrong things, tragedies, thrills, scares, chills. Seems unreal. Looking back, wishing I'd been more tactful, nonetheless I love who I am, without those dreadful thoughts, situations, spot of no control and memorizing rebellious on my part, wasn't sure where to start. I have a heavy, dense, intricate heart. Complications make yourself. Take them, make them, break them, start from scratch, scratch your eye patch. Successful endeavors beat you, overcome them. You win again with that awful sly grin.

Soft and dainty as a rose petal. Dew drops on my forehead. Kisses from the sky. Blooming sweetness, growing past my eyes. Prickly thorns to my surprise are beautiful, poisonous and splintery to the touch. Blood drips down the stem. I smile because I like the color red. The sun's beaming down my back, I continue smiling trying not to crack. Repeating thoughts, crowded, lost into my mind. I peak into your soul. Torn, worn, and black holes. Vessels, bitter sweet kisses fall unto your lips. Leading down my core. Your fingers trickle over the notches in my spine. I shudder at the thought of your non-existence here. The chills you spread across my neck, tip-toeing to my head. My hair stands now. I'm submissive to your defeat. My adoration for you is overwhelming, keeping me in heat. I crave more. They say every rose has it's thorn. I'm curious as hell what your catch is, what it possibly may be. You are genuine perfection to me.