I´m so ****** up
I think already
I have no solving.

I'm the person
that always is a trouble
wherever it is.

I'm the sick person
that all families have.

I'm the person
that everybody try to
help, but nobody care about.

I'm the person
that nobody love,
because I'm a *******
freak.

I'm the person
that the only thing that
wants is silence,
because I want to shout my fears
to the wind and hope that
somebody take them.

I´m so ****** up
I think already
I have no solving.

I'm sitting in my bed
looking at the rain.

I remembered
our first kiss.
It was 2 years ago,
and it was raining...
like today.

I remembered they way
you held my face, and
how you caressed my neck.

I was happy and
I think you were too.

Almost inmediately,
I realized I was in love with you,
probably I already knew that.

A kiss under the rain,
such a cliché.
You've always hated clichés,
I don't know what I was thinking
when I supposed
that I was able
to make you enjoy clichés...
like watching romantic movies,
texting until 2 am,
missing each other,
talking about everything...
but I was wrong,
people don't change.

The sky is almost dark,
the sun is hidden,
you are gone
and I'm crying,
because I've no one to kiss
under this heavy rain.

I like to watch the sky,
I love the way it
connects everybody.

Specially at night,
when a millions of
little lights shine
around me.

I watch everything
and a thousands of questions
come to my mind.

I'm so lucky
to be alive.

The sky connect
the whole world.

We can be watching the
same star,
even though we are miles
away from each other.

Sometimes
I can't believe how much
I love to be alive, to be able
to do the things I want to do.

When I'm sad,
I look the sky and
I don't feel alone,
I feel that
all these little lights
involve me and give me
peace.

The sky is that place
when I can rest my mind.

Because when I look the sky,
I feel infinite.

The first time I saw you,
you were drinking a coffee
and smoking,
maybe that was a signal
that we would never work...
I hate cigarettes.

You had that smile
for which I would have given my life,
those kaleidoscope eyes
that used to carry me to another galaxy...
our galaxy.

I never thought
that I would write of you
because I always write about
things that hurt me...
and I'd never thought that
your love would end in a heartbreak.
I didn't want you to be a scar in my soul
I wanted you to be some kind of magic cream
that would take away oll of the pain.

I thought that our love would be eternal,
that we would be a "happily forever after"
but, darling, I was so ******* wrong,
we were just two stupid kids
who didn't know anything about love.

I always thought that cry for a boy
was such a stupid thing,
but I cried for over three months
and I still cry sometimes.
Because You left me alone
in the middle of the dark,
you took all my light away.

I know that it can sound stupid,
but I feel broken
like if You had punched me
really hard in the chest,
I cannot breath deeply
because it hurts...
it really hurts.

You are probably having fun
with a blonde girl you met a bar,
or travelling around the country
as you always wanted...
and here I am,
writing about you,
a boy who didn´t love me back anymore,
who left me away and moved on.

But I don't hate you
as I used to do,
I really hope that you find someone
who can love you with the passion I did,
that cares you and protects you from the world.

People say that
if you fall for a person who writes,
you will always live in their writings
and I like to think
that a part of you, of  our love,
will always be alive in my soul
so I can write about them.

Only God knows
how much I loved you
and how much I still do,
but I have to move on
and this is my goodbye.

I've been lying
in my bed for
like 20 minutes.

I 'm not thinking
about anything
but at the same time
I'm thinking
about everything.

I'm thinking
about death.

Is it true
that you see
the light
at the end of the tunnel?

Do you have pain
while you're dying?

Do you die like
you have lived?

Do you look
for death?

Or the death
looks for you?

Everything in this live
is so strange,
but the death is stranger.

What does it taste?

Is it true
that all your life
go through your eyes
while you're dying?

Do suicides go
to Heaven?

Is there anything
after death?

What is death?

Sometimes I feel
I can do anything,
and nothing hurts me.

I feel sick.

I've been lying
in my bed for
like 30 minutes.

I keep thinking
in death.

Sometimes I would like
to die, but
sometimes I feel so alive
that I can fly.

I have so much questions
about death.

But I have no answers.

*Sometimes I think,
that I'm already dead.

My heart is like an unmade bed,
it may look a bit messy
but I swear it's a
safe place to stay.

Have you ever wondered
which hurts the most:
saying something and
wishing you had not,
or saying nothing,
and wishing you had?

I'm not
the most romantic person
in the world.

I don't want the sky
or shooting stars.

I don't want
gems or gold.

Someday
I'll get all of that.

I want a steady hand,
a noble soul.

I want to sleep and wake up
knowing that my heart is safe.

I want to love and be loved.

Sometimes I feel like I'm deaf,
I don't hear anything.

I feel like
I'm floating.

Sometimes I don't see
bad things.
I only see
what makes me happy.

I see my dog
wagging his tail,
I see my brothers
laughing as if the world ended
and I laugh too because their laugh
make me feel special,
I see my parents drinking coffee
asking each other how was their day,
I see my grandfathers and all the stories
they told me,
I see my cats playing and running
around house.
I see all the things that I 've been doing
and I feel happy.

I have this feel
in my chest
that tells me that all my problems
have solutions.

Sometimes I don't see
bad things.
I only see
what makes me happy.

I feel  hope.
And that makes me happy.

like the moon
I have a dark side
that neither the stars
can shine,
and a cold side
that neither the sun
can burn.

I can't unlove you.
And I don't want to.

People like me,
sit in the darkness
watching the others
making their dreams come true
and being happy.

We cheer
because we are
happy for them,
and in the deep of
our heart,
we wish that things like that
happen to us too,
when we know that it's impossible,
because we all know
that we were born in the darkness.

She was a great story.
He was the best reader.

As much as being
broken up hearts,
being alone is
way worse.

Some people smokes,
others drink, and others fall in love,
each one dies from a different way.

When It rains,
look for rainbows.

When It's dark,
look for stars.