That night — That one fateful night
The one where I slipped back into the world
Which I had fought so hard to come out of

That feeling — that liberating free feeling
Before my descent, I felt so alive!
I felt like for the first time, I was finally part
Of all that was going on

We all had fun — We had so much fun!
We talked, and we laughed,
And we listened to music in the bedroom
And watched the darkness slowly fade away

Then came the morning — A beautiful new day
That night was gone forever, but not from our minds
That night — That one fateful night

Oh — That girl.

She's such a strange one.

Such a strange girl

She doesn't cry — She bleeds

She can't talk

As hard as she tries

Can't find the words

That very strange girl.

She'll never fit in

Not even with her own family

Or even others who also don't fit in.

Pfft — just leave her be

*She'll go away eventually.

I know this must seem strange to you,
As I’d bet a lot of things about me do.
There’s just so much I want you to know,
And so much I want to know about you.

First, let me start by sharing something,
You are always in my heart, my thoughts, and my dreams.
Not a moment goes by without you in my mind,
For you I wish only the best of everything

What kinds of things make you very happy?
What kinds of things make you sad?
What kinds of things scare you and why?
And what kinds of things make you angry or mad?

You see, these are all things that a mother should know
Because she’s there every day watching her child grow
She doesn’t have to ask these questions like I do
But I ask, because I too need to know

I often wonder what you must think about me,
And why I’m not the mom I know I should be.
Then I get so sad and so scared inside
And I cry because if I were you I know I’d be mad at me.

There’s something else that I really must say,
And you need to know this, because this is what I pray;
Every time I talk to God I give thanks that
You were blessed with such a great dad in every kind of way.

Son, I love you and I’m so very proud of you,
And of the person you are, and the things that you do
I haven’t been there nearly as much as I should
And that’s my fault, it’s not because of you.

Sometimes when I think of you, it’s very late at night
I think, “What’s my baby dreaming of and was his day alright?”
I wonder what you had for dinner, and if you remembered to brush your teeth
And  then I wish you were here so I could kiss you goodnight.

So tell me my son, what makes you happy,
And what sorts of things make you sad?
What kinds of things scare you and why?
And what kinds of things make you angry or mad?

There are no doors on the seventeenth floor,
For the seventeenth floor is mine.
I've awakened here every morn
Since nineteen-seventy-nine

I wear no clothes, and I have no shoes
I've bid farewell to lust,
Because here I live on the seventeenth floor
With nothing but bugs and dust

My family now disowns me
And I have no friends these days
For their sights are keen, and they have seen
That I have set my ways

My head shrink says I'm crazy
He said that’s why I'm in this place
And on a whim, I agreed with him
It's a crazy even pills can't erase

I take my meds every morning
And then again at noon
I've been taking these pills daily in good faith
And still I'm loony as a toon!

When at first they locked me up here
Before they totally gave up on me
They said that if I would be as good as I could
That someday I might even go free

 Then one fine day they brought me a gift
Said it was a jacket made specially for me
They helped put it on, (wait! The sleeves are too long!)
And they ran away laughing as they threw away the key

Days into weeks, and weeks became months
The months eventually turned into years
It's been so long since I've seen any one
Do they even remember I'm here?!!?

There are no doors on the seventeenth floor
For the seventeenth floor is all mine
To be perfectly clear, I've been locked up here
Since July of nineteen seventy-nine

Sailing through the tunnels
In the morning by yourself
There's a very special feeling
It's the sensation all is well

If you stand and reach your arms out wide
Close your eyes and try to fly
It's all just an illusion
A truth from which you can not hide

There's no indication of
What we were meant to be
given up to strangers
begging, yearning to be free

You knew all the answers
And you shouted them like anthems
Anxious and suspicious
That God knew how much we cheated

And now you've spent your life
Waiting for this moment
And when you saw it come
*It passed you by and left you so defeated