sweaty fat slapped
the dim lit bedroom smelled of foot
awkwardly fumbling, distorted zippers
faces pressed in smashed disarray
falling up the stairs
through the stoop
small talk left at the bar
tiny stool engulfed in a sea of ***
get this fine lady a drink
the scrawny hook-tender waltzed in
after 37 years of disappointment
tonight was gonna be his night
Charlie looked himself in the mirror
was it all worth it?–

steady battle of wills
mine against the culture
society at large
waiting for the return
of an imaginary friend –
visions of the Christ-head
waking Christians with a start
yet the image they see
is a white hippy
long flowing locks
and washboard abs
blue eyed devil
was what the natives called that image –
if Jesus were real
and the gospel, truth
then woolen hair
bronze skinned
north African
negros
would be visiting people nightly
giving them images of peace
and transcendence –
yet the visions these Christians are having
is of the rapture
is the end of days
of themselves being covered in joy
and carried away
by the loving god of old…
but it is the blue eyed devil
sending these signals –
I spent two years
in full research mode
then, 25 years of revisiting
so I could effectively combat
the religious intolerance I see around me
learning the scripture
not for love of Jesus
but for contempt of his hypocrite followers
now, I watch in awe
awestricken
as it is in fact an awesome thing
to think that a group of individuals
could persecute their brethren
based on race, ***, gender,
class, tattoos, piercings, abortions,
differing ideology, ice cream flavor,
car style, bank of choice, haircut,
military service, church participation,
education, geographic birth place…
I could go on
and on
and on…
……………………..
the larger point
is that the sermon on the mount
accepts everyone as blessed
the message of Jesus is one of acceptance
and tolerance
of love, and of heaven everlasting
for those who follow that message…..
sorry American Christian
with your prophetic visions
brought to you by a
blue eyed devil,
you picked the wrong horse –

gentle, but constant, warmth
encouraged the delicate petals
to unfurl,
extend and expose inner veins
and release fragrant wisps
wafting slowly
the length of the shoot laden meadow –
protruding with diligent
single-mindedness
they burst forth and dotted the landscape
with fresh and pale greenery
trading the stark, barren, winter wasteland
into a valley of rebirth
extension
and colorful beauty
destined for fawn frolic
and sparrow dancing –
sitting cross-legged
surrounded by the sounds of spring
the nonstop low ****** buzz
chirping and squawking  of the scrub jay
effortlessly hoping from branch to twig
twice on the ground
and back up into the treetops…
far off in the distance
carried only by a meandering breeze
the long slow shrill whistle
of a bull Roosevelt
brought my mind to the present
forcing my to consider my surroundings
with a different air –
without warning I was left
with only my heartbeat
and the steady in and out
of a mammal breathing, bated
a slight yet tangible fear began to grow within
and I felt an urge to flee screaming into the forest
for what seemed a lifetime
I gathered strength and courage
as a new and foreign warmth played across
my ***** and trembling neck hair
coiled muscled began to twist
as I slowly turned to see what I was sharing the meadow with
this fine and sunny day…..
sweat dripped as I forced myself  to make a full rotation
and cast my eyes upon the intruder
barley a slit of sunlight crept between tightly pressed lids
first a little of the left
then some of the right
slowly adjusting
to both the brightness of daylight
but also to the contrast presented
the large dark swaying body
outlined but the new delicate shoots
I could feel the sweat rise on my forehead
and travel slowly
along my hard cheek line and down my neck
weave through the chest hair
and circumnavigate my belly button
finally soaking into the edge of my blue jeans
slightly discoloring the material…
I felt a swelling of bravery as I gave the monster
my direct gaze –
large brown eyes momentarily caught my own
as the massive black bear offered a loud grunt
and rambled back into the dense and darkened thicket
slowly the songs of birds returned
and I saw a bee flash by…
I picked myself up, shaky,  but stoic  
offering a silent prayer to the universe
……thank you for no cubs –