you and i should just
run away and
live in a castle
wed be like two fairy tail characters
with a happy ending
you could be a prince
and ill be your princess
(king and queen is for old people)
no onell know where we went
but theyd notice
our grand ouse
one the side of a hill
itd be on the beach so we could
look out our stained glass windows
the sunsets could be purple and green
the two of us could explore
new chambers every day
we wouldnt need servants
because wed be happy to help each other
unlike bickering couples
because wed have a castle

the other day
a though popped into my head:
how much of our lives we spend
thinking about things
that have already happend.

what the hell is love anyway? why is there this supposed special connection to someone. And why do we fret so much when it goes away? what makes it different than a friendship? is it the extra doses of horomones you get from kissing? (wich, lets face it, is oly a trigger to the brain to think of ****** contact) why must humans search and find this ONE person the propose impossible promises to? Most animals just let their ****** need envelope them when they choose and dont think too much on the subject. But doses of religion and morals of society prohibit us from doing that. Are those morals the things telling us to seek out this unreasonable aspect of love? are those morals the secret to these pain-inflicting circumstances? becasue, all feelings are are certain levels and mixtures of horomones in the brain, so love is nothing more than a science. The thing that seperates the link between enjoing someone as a friend and as a suitor is ***. and the eason people get heartbroken and cry over losers who hurt them are merely the fault of morals

Today i was sitting under the shower
and thinking
thinking about all the teenage woes i have
and how the stupidest things can
consume my attention
in the midst of this i had a
moment when my mind
cleared and
just
stopped
thinking.
.
.
.
i focused on the little drops of watter
massaging my skin
this sensation sent a shiver up my spine.
for some reason the widest grin
appeared on my face
i felt as happy as a five year old
i closed my eyes and tilted my head
towards the water source.
the warmth ran down my face.
as the water seeped into my my nose and
between my lips i felt
alsmost as if i were
drowning.
....
when i realised i was being waistful,
i turned the faucet off and became
hypnotized by the steady dripping
id like the believe this event was significant
but i think it only further proves my insanity

have you ever been in
a situation where
you see someone
wearing something BIZZARE
and...you cant help
but stare?
you eventualy find the words
"i really like that"
coming from your lips.
i have also been on the
other side of this scenario
where i wear something
thats a fashion risk and
get compliments from
random people.
while i smile and exept it
i want to correct them with
"no, you mean, you like the fact
i had the ***** to wear it
and somewhat pull it off".

I love the way you make me feel
its as if time stops
it seems so surreal
i cant wait for the night
i can sleep by your side
if all be able to with
your heartbeat against mine.

when you played your guitar
it caught me by suprise
i laughed to myself
and then realized
i have the perfect guy
that all the girls dream of
and getting you
was not even rough

when you get upset
theres no need to apologize
or even analyze
ways you can compromise
just tell me you love me

i was always told
to second guess people
see things from different views
because they are evil
but when it comes to you
i know its unessesary
this dating buisness seemed hard
but now its preliminary

i never got to tell you how i soaked
up every word that was wispered from your lips.
I was sure you were true
so i locked your promises in my mind,
unknowing the toll they would take on me.
Now im spending my time,
squirming on my bed,
grasping my head
and trying to shake your words from my memory
considering they are of no use
except taking up space
im lucky that a few get blurred by my rare tears.
when they drip d0wn my cheeks
i can feel their suprising warmth
and it reminds me of you
how warm it was lying next to you
feeling your arms safely around me
the only thoughts running through my mind
where how i could never loose you
you told me i was the only thing you needed
i was yours forever and always
i had no clue my forever would end that friday
now im only left facing
and empty void